Operation Ostrava: Month 14, Week, 4, Day 2.

This past week in Syria the United Nations Support Mission In Syria (UNSMIS) has been boosted by the appointment of the Norwegian Major General Robert Mood as the mission commander. The number of UNSMIS observers has also increased to 30 and is expected to rise to 60 over the coming days. Despite this sporadic fighting has continued between Syrian and Saudi Irregular Army (SIA) fighters in Douma, Hama, Damascus, Homs and Aleppo. On Wednesday (25/4/12) a SIA bomb factory exploded in a civilian apartment complex in Hama destroying the buidling and killing 16. Today (30/4/12) two bombs exploded at Syrian military barracks in Idlib killing 20. The most worrying development though occurred on Friday (27/4/12) when a suicide bomber killed 11 as they prayed at the Zein al-Abidin Mosque in Damascus. This is alarming because up until now SIA bombings have been so-called rational attacks in which the bombers try to get as far away as possible from their bombs before they explode. The move towards suicide bombings suggests the involvement of Al Qaeda linked groups and indeed (30/4/12) a Jihadist group called the al-Nusra Front have claimed responsibility for Friday's attack.

Despite the fact that the overwhelming majority of recent violence has been carried out by the SIA against Syrian targets both the Arab League and the French foreign minister have called for a Chapter 7 United Nations Security Council (UNSC) resolution on Syria. A Chapter 7 resolution would allow for Libya-style military intervention against Syria but there is little chance of the UNSC passing such a resolution.

The big development in Syria this week has actually come from the United Nations Special Court on Sierra Leone which on Thursday (26/4/12) convicted Charles Taylor on 11 counts of war crimes and crimes against humanity. While the court (whose preliminary verdict can be read here; www.sc-sl.org) did not find convincing evidence that Charles Taylor had effective command and control over Revolutionary United Front (RUF) fighters it held that he was legally responsible for their actions because he had supplied them with non-lethal equipment including communications equipment (paragraphs 77-80) along with food, body armour, other clothing and medical supplies (paragraphs 83&84). In short Charles Taylor was supplying the RUF with exactly what members of the Syria Contact Group including Britain and the United States are proudly supplying to the SIA. Although every case should be tried on it's individual merits members of the Syria Contact Group will now have to come up with a very good excuse to explain why they are not legally responsible for the actions of the SIA.

While it is still debatable whether or not the SIA's bombing campaign constitutes a crime against humanity namely inflicting terror their mere presence constitutes a war crime contrary to Article 4(2) of the third Geneva Convention - the use of unlawful combatants. In order to be declared a lawful combatant the SIA must fulfil all four of the criteria laid out in the relevant part of the convention namely;

(a) "be commanded by a person responsible for his subordinates." That is to say that there must be a fixed command structure and a disciplinary procedure for violations. At present the SIA operate in small groups doing what they like when they like and most certainly don't fulfil this criteria.

(b) "have a fixed distinctive sign recognisable at a distance." That is to say that they must have a recognisable symbol, flag or colour that marks them out from both the opposition and the civilian population. At present the SIA operate in civilian clothes and fly the old Syrian flag which has three stars rather then two. That is simply not good enough to count as "distinctive."

(c) "openly carry their arms." This is more then simply having their fighter carrying their rifles when they're out and about. They must store all their arms including heavy weapons and ammunition in clearly marked military positions that are distinct from the civilian population. At present the SIA hide their weapons and fighters in civilian homes, hospitals and Mosques leaving their opponents with no option other then to attack those civilian homes, hospitals and Mosques.

(d) "conduct operations in accordance with the laws and customs of war." That is to say they must comply with all other parts of the Geneva Conventions and international conventions. For example they are not allowed to hide amongst civilian crowds in order to attack military positions nor fire into civilian crowds in order to generate black propaganda.

To my mind this fourth criteria is the most important criteria and creates a strong moral argument why no mercy should be shown to unlawful combatants. If people understand that if they break the laws of war then no-one will come to their aid and there is no limit to what can be done to them as punishment fewer people will be prepared to break those laws and we can avoid truly horrific scenes like the ones we've seen in places like Sierra Leone.

Operation Ostrava: Month 14, Week 4, Day 1.

I've come to the conclusion that I'm not going to get the time to post what will be a very long and technical update on Syria today (29/4/12) so I'm bumping it until tomorrow. It is fair to assume though that Britain's announcement that it intends to put anti-aircraft missiles atop of apartment buildings in London to protect the Olympic games is an attempt to promote discussion about the acceptability of the Saudi Irregular Army (SIA) using apartment buildings as bomb factories.

Ukraine Bomb Blasts.

I know I said I'd be taking the day off but this is going to annoy me otherwise.

Yesterday (27/4/12) four bomb blasts ripped through the city of Dnipropetrovsk in eastern Ukraine injuring 29. Along with Poland Ukraine will host the finals of the 2012 European Football Championships. Hosting a sporting of that scale always puts the host nation and it's government in the spotlight. Ukraine's recent political history has been very controversial. In 2004 the Pro-Russian elected President Viktor Yanukoyvch was ousted by Pro-western Viktor Yushchenko during the "Orange Revolution" one of many western backed colour themed revolutions that swept through eastern Europe at the time. In 2010 Viktor Yushchenko made way as Presidental candidate for another leader of the Orange Revolution Yulia Tymoshenko who was promptly defeated in the 2010 election by Viktor Yanukoyvch. Tymoshenko was then sent to prison for abusing her position while serving as the countries Prime Minister.

In the run-up to Euro2012 Tymoshenko has been a very noisy prisoner going on hunger strike and claiming to have been beaten by prisoner guards although the bruises she's shown to prove her point look more like hepatitis. She is receiving western backing in this effort most notably from Germany. Therefore it is possible that Yanukoyvch's government carried out yesterday's bombings to distract from all the publicity surrounding the Tymoshenko case. However it's equally possible the Tymoshenko's western backers carried out the bombings to smear the Yanukoyvich government. If it's the latter then I don't really know enough to point the finger at a suspect but Britain are certainly developing a reputation for this sort of thing. For them it also has the added advantage of putting pressure on Russia over Syria by making it look like Russia either carried out the bombings or supported them in order to raise the fact within Syria the Saudi Irregular Army (SIA) appear to be switching towards this type of terrorist bombing campaign.

Do Not Mention the Spot.

It's around 09:40GMT on 28/4/12 my home Internet connection is working and I've been up for about half an hour. As it's a Saturday - a day of rest in most cultures I'm thinking junk food and trash TV. I might even catch up on my reading and if I'm feeling very energetic I might update my archive at 100badones.com. One thing certainly won't be doing though is going near the high street because Crystal Palace are hosting Cardiff City.

Actually I might not go out at all because I'm feeling increasingly self-conscious about a massive spot on my forehead. Actually what happened is that I got a small spot just above my right eyebrow and decided to pick it leaving me with a largish cut. I know that was stupid but I get so many ingrowing hairs when I get an actual genuine spot I tend to get over excited.

I Think We Can All Agree...

...That was a lot of porn. Turns out my usual source isn't doing video anymore.This forced me out into what I remember of the wilder parts of the Internet even though I don't think that was a good idea in my present state. Anyway at around 01:20 on 28/4/12 it's really time for me to got to bed.

Hmmm Somky.

At around 23:40 on 27/4/12 I would like to tell you a long story about how I've got the back door open to clear out all the smoke that gathered during the cheese on toast incident. However let's be honest it's Friday night so I'm just going to look at a lot of porn instead.

But before we do that quick question; In the UK is it actually illegal to keep a Fox as a pet? It's just I'm hit with this sudden urge to give the local her flea medicine. You know - two quick drops to the back of the head. That's all it'll take. Britain's Channel 4 are doing a special on it on I believe Monday (30/4/12) so I'll try and get it all explained by then.

Hot, Hot Hot!

Good news I have made cheese on toast without setting fire to the house. In other news at around 23:20 on 27/4/12 the Chilean wine (35^ South) has given me Jewish purgatory. I don't know where's a sommelier when you need one?

Nope at around 23:25 spellcheck can't cope with sommelier either. I believe it may be French but at leas the cheese on toast has cooled down.

Man I am So Wasted.

So wasted in fact that I've just decided that I really, really need a toasted tuna melt. Although thinking about it maybe cheese on toast would be safer. Anyway the point is at around 22:55 on 27/4/12 if you here the fire alarm try not to panic it's only the grill.

So anyway the point is that the United Nations Security Council (UNSC) did meet today in New York but they were discussing South Sudan Vs Sudan. It turns out there's been some problems around the Helig oil fields but I feel there's definitely a "D" missing there somewhere because it's pronounced more Hedge-lig.

More importantly then that though the Charles Taylor verdict can be downloaded from http://www.sc-sl.org. I actually listened to the full verdict being read out on 26/4/12 but it went on for over two hours so I had a nap in the middle. Then I looked at the abridged version on the website and got confused so I went to bed. So now (23:00) I'm going to have to download it so I can read it in full on Saturday (28/4/12).

You really should take the time to read it too because even in the sanitised language of an official court judgement it begins to convey some of the horror involved in the conflict. My particular favourite is when they disemboweled the guy in the town square and then stretched his intestines across the road to form a vehicle checkpoint.

Anyway at around 23:05 I'm sure we're well passed the watershed now.

The Coffee is Brewed.

So at around 19:35 can we formally confirm or deny that the United Nations Security Council (UNSC) is meeting on the issue of Syria. I mean they meet every day but assuming that this isn't going to turn into a three day binge on Sunday (29/4/12) may need to fall back on the issue.

So while the verdict in the Charles Taylor trial available on http://www.sc-sl.org is only preliminary and his very slick British barrister still has the right to appeal I believe he'll be dying in HMP Belmarsh.

Anyway 19:40 and I'm attempting to publish.

Nope the Title Failed.

My previous post should have been entitled; "Would I Lie To You."

Anyway now that show's started at around 19:30 on 27/4/12. The coffee is brewing so I'll be stay with BBC1 all the way until "The Mentalist."

Followed by Have I got News for You and Not Going Out.

Well at around 19:25 can I just say that the BBC certainly knocked it out of the park tonight! Unfortunately my father has been sucked into some nonsense abou the world's biggest, hardset engineering machines on Channel 5. So I'm going to make coffee and test that my home Internet connection is working at around 19:30 27/4/12. After all the title was giving me problems.

Actually It'd be Better if my Home Internet didn't work.

Because at around 18:20GMT/19:20BST on 27/4/12 I could give you a cryptic Twitter like;

"The (Chilean) Wine Has Been Opened" 18:20 27/4/12."

However as it is working I should tell you that I got the Cottage Pie in the Oven about 16:10. Even though this included the old Bristol Swede I didn't cut my fingers off. Actually thinking about it if I had the time I  could have wrapped in pastry rather then mashed potatoes.

But anyway after watching the Loius Theorox thing on Dementia on BBC2 last night (20:00 26/4/12) my father was all keen to go visit my grandmother in her nursing home. When he arrived (approx 10:00) he found two staff from every floor standing out in the rain because they'd had a fire alarm test. According to the local gossip this might have something to do with the Queen of England's "Jubilee Tour" which apparently took her to some Welsh mining town in the 1960's.

So at around 18:30 while we wait for "Homelands" Damien Lewis on Have I Got News For You shall we paly the game of guess which US TV Show gave the Brits the idea about "Claire Squires"?

The Siege is Over. I have a Newspaper.

Yeah the Tottenham Court Road siege ended at around 13:30GMT. Apparently it was some White/EDL/Rangers/Chav giving it the large to his ex-missus about how he's brought a bomb into her workplace. So the Met police over-reacting and turned it into a scene from the French terrorist shooter guy. More importantly then that though at around 14:45 on 27/4/12 I have returned from the corner shop with a copy of "The Sun" newspaper and four Budweiser Tallboys. This little diversion almost prevented me from telling you about the best pub in the world;

This best pub in the world is officially "The Black Lion" in my back garden. I mean you can do anything there, you can go to the gym, you can drink beer and you can even smoke in there. One thing you cannot do though is watch the TV news in there. As a result I know next to nothing about today's bombing in Ukraine. This is a shame because given the choice I'd rather been doing the security run through for the Euro 2012 Finals rather then the Olympics. Actually thinking about it there's a good chance Britain's hooligans could make the Euro 2012 Finals the first round of the "Security" event at the Olympics. So in summary; Russian bomb to make a point see also Syria after the - I'm not going to call him Joesph Kony, I'm not going to call him Joesph Kony, I'm not going to call him Joesph Kony - trial at the Hague.

Bugger. At around 14:55 I'm just realised I've got to make Cottage Pie which might actually kill me. If not I'll see you at about 19:00 in the bleachers.

Witches Sale: Four for a pound!

Sorry but at around 13:30GMT  on 27/4/12 I'm beginning to think I might have overdone it at Friday prayers.

Anyway yesterday (26/4/12) an Inspector in London's Metropolitan (Met) Police was arrested for racially abusing a black man in north London. This is just the latest in a series of similar stories recently. So much so they sort of blur into one.

Anyway the reason for this is that although London's (Met) police improved dramatically in terms of race relations following  the Stephan Lawerence murder/McPhearson report - especially in terms of recruiting more officers from ethnic minorities - a large part of the institutional racism was simply driven underground. However when the Labour government was replaced in 2010 with the current Conservative government a lot of the racists in the Met felt the ban had been lifted and they could get away with whatever they wanted. Then the August 2011 riots happened and senior figures in the State/Met/Government realised that although the Crown the Judiciary and Parliament would let them get away with it there would still be consequences. Sending out this message so loudly and clearing feels to me like the State/Met/Government giving positive re-enforcement to the rioters. Also yesterday the Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) released video of the moments after the shooting by police of Mark Duggan in Tottenham that sparked the August 2011 riots.

Today (27/4/12) we've got some sort of siege going on on Tottenham Court Road in Central London. So actually thinking about it maybe this is me being put on trial. In which case it's nice to be informed in advance.

Anyway at around 13:40 I think that's earned a pint.

Operation Oil Theft: Month 15, Week, 3, Day 3.

Since my last post on the subject there has thankfully been very little violence in Libya. On April 10th (10/4/12) a home made bomb was thrown at a convoy of United Nations Support Mission In Libya (UNSMIL) vehicles but no injuries were reported. Kidnappings continue in the east of the country close the border with Tunisia. These include two Tunisians who were kidnapped inside Tunisia on April 8th (8/4/12) and the kidnapping of the head of the Darj town council on April 21st (21/4/12). That kidnapping is believed to have been carried out by the Zintan Brigade militia in retaliation for Darj's desire to be included in the Ghadames electoral district rather then the Zintan electoral district.

The Zintan Brigade's unconventional approach to political debate aside the rest of Libya has been preparing for June's election. On April 24th (24/4/12) the National Transitional Council (NTC) announced that it's meetings will be open to to the press and public bringing it in line with Parliaments and Senates in democratic, first world nations. The Higher National Electoral Commission (HNEC) is in the process of drawing up a national register of voters. Due to differences in methodologies the HNEC will disregarded local lists and start again from scratch meaning that everyone will have to re-register to vote using only the family book as proof of identity. Also the HNEC will not be allowing Libyans living abroad to take part in the June 19th (19/6/12) vote. This is simply because it will take far too long to register all the Libyan exiles and their children and provide them with ballot papers and polling stations in their country of residence. The HNEC has also announced that political parties who receive foreign funding or represent a regional, tribal or religious ideology will be banned from taking part. Although the bar on foreign funding is perfectly reasonable and in line with most democratic nations the ban on regional, tribal or religious ideology is likely to be controversial. It could prevent the Muslim Brotherhood linked Justice and Construction Party from taking part and will definitely prevent the National Federal Bloc (NFB) who want autonomy for the Cyrenaica region. Depending on how much support the NFB have this could lead to a boycott of the election fuelling accusations that the elected government does not represent the east of the country increasing calls for regional autonomy.

Apart from election preparations the other big aspect of Libyan life is post-war reconstruction. Between April 17th (17/4/12) and April 19th (19/4/12) British Lord Trefgarne led a trade delegation of British construction, engineering and telecommunications companies under the banner of the Libyan British Business Council (LBBC) and on May 20th (20/5/12) Tripoli will host the Libya Building and Construction Conference which is expected to host trade delegations from across the globe. This level of international involvement has led to various Libyan groups including the Architectural Company for Aluminium And Glass Works (ACAGW) complaining that all the business is going to foreign companies which operate illegally and pay bribes and this is causing unemployment. Normally I'm opposed to this sort of protectionism especially when it's practised by developed nations. However due to the war and the transition towards democracy it is clear that Libya is an exceptional case. Therefore they should avoid - as far as possible - awarding any long term contracts until they've elected a transparent and accountable government to award those contracts fairly. They should also introduce a "Buy Libyan" policy that - provided they're up to the job - would see priority given to Libyan companies over foreign competitors.

The issue of what happens to Libya's most famous prisoner - Saif al-Islam Qaddafi - is still outstanding. On April 10th (10/4/12) the NTC unveiled the court in a former military academy in Tripoli in which they intend to try Saif al-Islam once the Zintan Brigade militia surrender him to the NTC's custody. That the trial is to be held in Libya appears to be a condition of the Zintan Brigade handing control of Tripoli's international airport to the NTC. That handover was completed on April 20th (20/4/12) but Saif al-Islam remains a prisoner of the Zintan Brigade. On April 18th the Chief Prosecutor of the International Criminal Court (ICC) Luis Moreno-Ocampo visited Libya to discuss the case. He said that the ICC has requested written submissions from the NTC and will consider them before deciding whether or not to give Libya permission to try Saif al-Islam. Two things that are not helping Libya's claim that they are in a position to give Saif al-Islam a fair trial is that the judicial authority (the NTC) have yet to take custody of the prisoner some five months after his arrest. Also the NTC say they expect to reach a final verdict in the case before the June 19th (19/6/12) election which is some seven weeks away. To put that in perspective the much simpler trial of Anders Behring Breivik in Norway is expected to last for ten weeks. The fact the NTC seem to think they can reach a verdict in such a short time suggests that they've already decided what that verdict is going to be meaning that it most certainly won't be a fair trial.

Charles Taylor's Been Convicted.

Today (26/4/12) at the Hague former Liberian President Charles Taylor has been convicted of aiding and abetting crimes against humanity at an International Criminal Court (ICC)/United Nations Special Tribunal hybrid. The 11 offences including rape, sexual slavery, slavery, mutilation and the use of child soldiers relate to the 11 year civil war in Sierra Leone.The verdict is important because it marks possibly the first time that a head of state has been convicted by an international court and certainly the first time that one has been convicted by an ICC/UN court. Therefore it marks a landmark in the advancement of international justice and the fight against war crimes and crimes against humanity. Something that members of the Syria Contact Group should be well aware of.

Unfortunately very few people here in Britain will be aware that it has happened because we're still going with blanket coverage of the second day of Rupert Murdoch giving evidence to the Leveson Inquiry into media ethics. I wouldn't mind so much but one of the key things that made the trial possible was former British Prime Minister Tony Blair's decision to send British troops into Sierra Leone in 2000. Also now that he has been convicted Taylor is expected to serve at least part of his sentence here in the UK.

There's Your Double Dip.

The UK economic growth figures for the first quarter of 2012 have just been released. They show that in January, February and March the UK economy shrank by 0.2%. Added to the 0.3% shrinkage in the final quarter of 2011 this means the British economy is technically back in recession - the first double-dip recession since the 1970's apparently.

Later today (25/4/12) the Chancellor of the Exchequer (Head Finance Minister), George Osborne is going to give a statement to the House of Commons in order to explain himself. The opposition Labour Party will leap on an element of the figures that show a shrinking in the construction industry brought about by cuts to government spending. This of course will re-ignite the Europe-wide debate over austerity. However I would much rather hear from the Labour Party's former Prime Minister Gordon Brown and former Chancellor Alistair Darling. After all it is their "Save the banks. Save the world!" nonsense that has got us into this situation.

Back in 2008 the credit crunch hit when some banks that had made bad investments were brought to the brink of collapse. Rather then simply letting these banks collapse Brown and Darling somehow talked national governments across the world into borrowing heavily in order to bail the banks out. Now in 2012 we're in the situation where the national governments that borrowed heavily to invest in the bad banks are being brought to the brink of collapse. So in short if we'd just let the bad banks collapse in 2008 this would all be over by now but thanks to Brown and Darling it looks like we're going to stretching it out until 2015 at the earliest.

Anyway at around 09:35 on 25/4/12 I'm awake, my home Internet connection is working, Rupert Murdoch is on the stand at the Leveson Inquiry and it's raining heavily. So it might just be easier for me to go back to bed. I won't though, I'll have breakfast, go to the gym and generally try to muddle through.

The Moving Song.

No matter what the wasp says that is the track I'm dedicating to the 17 Hippies living at #50.

Anyway at around 23:05 on 24/4/12 I'm either going to bed or the floor is going to rise up and bash me on the chin. Either way I hope I'm up time to see Old Uncle Rupert take the stand around 09:00 on 25/4/12 because I'm just that sort of working class hero.

My Clipper Has Failed Me.

So at around 22:35 on 24/4/12 I've come back inside to find a light to finish my joint because it turns out they're still playing the song.

Oh For the Wings of a Dove.

At around 22:00 on 24/4/12 I would select a new radio station. However as it seems all I've got is angry wasps and Protestant war hymns I'll be off to the Black Lion for a while

Born of a Broken Man.

At around 21:30 on 24/4/12 that is both the answer to the question; "What RATM song have I been listening to?" and my response to the BBCNews that Britain is going to attempt to re-open the "Madeline McCann" judgement with the Portuguese.

Anyway did any one see Mrs Perry answering questions before Keith Vaz MP at the Home Affairs select committee? I only mention it because when I was at a South London Comprehensive Keith Vaz's Private Secretary came down to teach us science. He turned up looking like Lawrence Fishburne form "CSI" all waistcoat and glasses. Due to his Asian race he even looked a bit like Penfold off of "Dangermouse" I think we even made him cry.

Anyway I'm off again to the Black Lion for a "smoke." Actually thinking about it I've got a bit of morphine upstairs. It might make tomorrow better but it'll certainly make Thursday and Friday worse. After all it is so moorish.

Your Airport's Ugly! Your Bus Stations Ugly!

Your Train Station's Ugly! Your Women are Ugly! Your treatment of Ranger's fans is appalling but on the plus side your ceveza's much stronger so I'll see you next year.

Anyway at around 21:10 on 24/4/12 I've got no strong feelings about the football either way. I'm just happy to listen to RATM on the old iPod.

The Ginger Fox Sleeps...

...Beneath the Black Lion?

Anyway at around 20:55 I'm back in for a beer. Does anyone know the football score because if Barcelona lost I've got a whole list of reasons about why I hate Spain.

Great Bowden I'm Home!

I kid you not "Great Bowden" is the Leicestershire town where London Marathon death - Claire Squires - lived with her boyfriend "Simon"

So at around 19:10GMT on 24/4/12 it's still 0-0 and I Simon Bowden am pleased to announced that I'm back from the pub. More words will appear here just as soon as I've opened a Budweiser Tallboy.

Edited at around 19:20 on 24/4/12 to add;

Anyway. After we'd entered the pub my father - L.T. Bowden proceeded to annoy the two deaf guys speaking in sign language before pointing out the regular wearing what we presume to be a stolen London Marathon participants medal. He went on to sit me down to discuss his plans to buy a smartphone. In part this is driven by his desire to have access to the Internet when the home Internet connection is down and in part it is driven by a desire for me to finally pay for my cellphone. So I gave him some flannel about the Windows Vs Android debate Vs my gay little brother's membership of the Apple cult and my need to repair my credit rating. It was at this point the Euro/mental/lesbian who's been stalking me for about a week decided to leave. Then for the rest of the meal we sat in silence while he played with his peas and I drank my beer. I only had the burger because I had a Cornish Pasty when we got back from the supermarket at around 15:00.

It was when I got back from the supermarket and noticed Britain's other magicians assistant of the day - the Gareth Williams Inquest - I decided that counter-intuitive as it seems the best way for me to answer this question of whether my house is bugged or not is to film every moment of my existence and then post footage up on the Internet. All I need is a sponsor to pay for all the CCTV cameras.

Anyway does anyone known the Spanish for;

I'm going to sit in the garden.

Because it's going to be a long one. I mean I've been trying to get into the "Dutch" mindset since about 10:00.

As for the Taffy Williams Inquest I refer you to my earlier statement; The tightly wound maths genius who graduated from university aged 17 years killed himself. Then his friends/mates/buds from MI6/SIS staged the crime scene in case the Brits ever needed to drag us all down into some nonsense story.

A Marathon is a Really Long Race.

In fact every year at least person makes a point of not finishing the London Marathon until about a week after it started. I think this year it's a woman trying to highlight the advancements made by cybernetics in the treatment of spinal injuries which is very Terminator-esque.

So you'll excuse me for going on about it but at  around 15:10GMT on 24/4/12 the Justgiving.com website for the woman who died during the race - Claire Squires - has raised around £400,000(USD640,000) for the Samaritans charity and the total's growing at a rate of around £16,000(USD26,000) per hour. While I can't really think of a better charity to donate money to if you are in a giving mood there are other charities to give money to because I think the Samaritans have met their entire annual operating budget from this alone.

While I suppose they would be classed as a mental health charity the Samaritans are basically and anti-suicide hotline. They operate a toll free telephone number that is promoted around suicide hotspots like Beachy Head in Eastborne and the Clifton Suspension Bridge in Bristol. The idea is that if someone is seriously contemplating suicide they ring the number and speak to a trained volunteer who will talk them out of it. However I wouldn't really describe the Samaritans as a mental health charity because although they want to kill themselves most of the people who use their services don't have a recognised mental health condition. Instead they've just found themselves in an exceptionally stressful situation because of financial worries, the end of a relationship or a bereavement. So all they need is someone to calm them down while the situation naturally improves and they get on with their lives.

Against the back drop of the global recession and the austerity measures this type of suicide has become a hot issue especially in Europe. While I haven't seen the figures I suspect the suicide rate in Britain has increased significantly and in Greece in most certainly has with a recent gruesome incident where a pensioner shot himself in the head outside the Parliament building. So by drawing attention to the Samaritans Britain appears to be focusing on this very tragic human consequence of austerity in order to energise anti-austerity movements across the Eurozone while Britain itself sorts it's economy out by pushing ahead with austerity measures. Gert Wilders in the Netherlands appears to be helping them by effectively vetoing the Dutch Budget.

However having said that I seemed to have talked myself into actually reading the Dutch Budget. Not tonight though, it's Tuesday so I'll shortly be going to the pub and becoming incoherent by around 18:20GMT.


Edited at around 17:05GMT on 24/4/12 to add:

Of course today my father and I have been to the supermarket which gave me a break from Jame Murdoch's 6 hour testimony to the Leveson Inquiry into press standards - an event where I am undeniably the elephant in the room. Unfortunately it wasn't enough a break to avoid leaving me feeling like my head's about to explode. I wouldn't worry too much though. It's either too much caffeine or not enough. Either way I'm sure beer will fix it. Anyway as a result I've not read the Dutch Budget or actually looked Claire Squires' Justgiving.com website so you'll excuse me if I just sort of make this next bit up;

According to at least one under pressure British newspaper I've been reading today the majority of the £400,000(USD640,000) total has been made up by a high volume of small, individual donations of like £10(USD16) or £20(USD32). So the whole thing looks rather like the 2008 campaign fundraising efforts of a one Mr Barack Obama - I believe you may have heard of him.

The Dutch Are Definately up to Something

Even if I'm not quite sure what.

Yesterday (23/4/12) the government of the Netherlands collapsed after right-wing nutcase* Gert Wilders withdraw from the coalition in protest against austerity measures imposed on Eurozone nations as part of the October 27th fiscal compact. The Dutch Royal Family have long been allies of the British Royal Family so coming just days after the International Monetary Fund (IMF) meeting and the start of the French Presidential run-off in which Francois Hollande's opposition to austerity measures will be a major factor this seems too convenient. I hope it's not Britain trying to convince the Eurogroup of countries that austerity measure are unnecessary while Britain itself is imposing even stronger austerity measures.


*Although that sounds rude you'll note I stopped short of calling him a fascist even if he seems to be very keen on this battle of civilisations between the Muslim world and the Christian world.

Marathon Update.

Yep I've spent most of today (23/4/12) trying to catch up on a week worth's of news in a couple of hours. I dread to think what my email inbox is going to look like.

More importantly though more information has emerged about yesterday's (22/4/12) London Marathon. Firstly event organisers have apologised for making the personal details (name/address etc) of all participants available online. As a marathon race is an Olympic event this obviously Britain trying to promote discussion about protecting the details of the Olympic participants including all the spies especially from the email/phone hacking media who are still in trouble at the Leveson Inquiry. Even more importantly the 30 year old woman who died in yesterday's event has been named as Claire Squire from Leicestershire and since then her Justgiving.com page has raised £120,000 (USD190,000) for The Samaritans charity. Although I'm sure that most of this is just the generosity of the British public it does make her death look more suspicious.

While her death was undoubtedly from natural causes you can't just run the London Marathon. Assuming that you're not a professional marathon runner represented by a national athletics association you have to apply for one of the charitable places which are massively over-subscribed. If you are lucky enough to win one of the those places you then have to raise a minimum amount of money (I think £3000/USD4800) in order to compete. Therefore it wouldn't be too difficult for someone with the right sort of access to manipulate the selection process to make sure a person who wasn't physically quite up to running 26.2 miles got a place especially if that person had previously been involved in the Royal Air Force (RAF) Association. Having the amount of donations suddenly spike draws attention to a death that occurred on a very busy news day and promotes discussion about the changes to the UK tax laws on charitable donations. You see the objective is not to totally remove the charitable sector of civil society but to make it more dependent on the Crown. For example many of the charities I've dealt with like Mind in Croydon and Croydon Voluntary Action are registered with the Charity Commission and fulfil the legal framework for a Charity. However their fund raising activities are limited to simply cashing government cheques. After the proposed reforms these sort of Charities will be fine but it is arguable that they are part of the state sector rather then civil society

An example of a country where civil society has been co-opted into the state in this way would Mubarak's Egypt where the food subsidy system meant that rather then having farmers selling wheat and bakers buying flour through private enterprise you simply had the government providing bread. Apart from providing me with a good example of the importance of civil society it also reminds me that I need to get on with Egypt's upcoming Presidential election and the trials over the Port Said football tragedy. For example I'm not sure suspending the football league is the best idea. After all if people are going to be rioting surely it's better they do it in a stadium where they have to opt in by buying a ticket and travelling to the game rather then doing it in the middle of the capital city where they'll get in everyone's way and scare off the tourists.

And don't even get me started on how Britain is trying to castrate the House of Lords by turning it into an ineffective elected body just as impotent as the House of Commons.

If You're Looking For a Defanition of the English Expression...

..."Famous last words." It's me saying; "I'll be moving away from these stream of consciousness posts" while knowing full well I'm going to the pub later that evening. See also; "It'll be fine. I'll just pour the petrol from this jerry can into that jug over this lit gas stove." Or to put it another way look at how much good stuff you missed out on by cutting me off last Tuesday (17/4/12).

Anyway today (23/4/12) it's been announced that the US Atlantic Council will be awarding their humanitarian award to British Princes William and Harry for their work with servicemen and women injured in Afghanistan and Iraq. Prince Harry is expected to accept the award at the ceremony. This could be the US' way of admitting that apart from leaving me unable to function Britain's attempts to drive me into insanity was to conduct research on mental health problems to assist servicemen and women returning from Afghanistan and Iraq with mental health problems. By congratulating Britain on it's work the US is also attempting to distance itself from what could well be viewed as an atrocity under international law. Of course though I think we all know that Britain couldn't have thought up something that sophisticated all on their own. Alternatively they could be trying to do something entirely different. After all the Atlantic Council is a right-wing lobby group rather then an actual part of the US government.

Bahrain Free the C4News Team.

As you may have heard over this past weekend the Gulf Kingdom of Bahrain have been hosting the Formula 1 Grand Prix amid protests in the country. While the Bahraini regime were very keen for the international media to come in and film around the race circuit they were much less keen for the international media to report on what is going on in the rest of the country. For example they refused to allow SkyNews into the country and Sky were the network broadcasting the race in the UK. Yesterday (22/4/12) evening the Bahraini authorities arrested a Channel 4 News team who were trying to report the protests. They were released at around 22:00GMT/23:00BST.

Channel 4 is the network that broadcasts the US TV show "Homeland" in the UK and they have an extensive on online community to allow fans of the show to discuss the various plot twists and turns on the Internet. Without giving too much away yesterday's episode seemed to suggest that the government of Saudi Arabia were responsible for plotting Al-Qaeda terror attacks in the United States. Bahrain is highly dependent on Saudi patronage with Saudi Arabia supplying much of the cash, equipment and personnel needed to put down Bahrain's uprising. The Saudis also have a tendency to use Bahrain as their brothel. So I think the real reason why Bahrain seized the Channel 4 News team was to sweat the network out as public reaction to the episode of "Homeland" started to come in.

Marathon Death.

No that's not a reference to Willem Defoe in "Platoon."

Today (22/4/12) 37,000 professional and amateur runners decided to waste their lives by taking part in the London Marathon. It has since been announced that a 30 year old woman collapsed and died during the race. This could be the Brits trying to start a rumour that I'd died or that they were considering me dead to them. It could also have been the Brits trying to start he same sort of rumours about my mythical arch-enemy "Hannah." Alternatively it could just be one of those things. In the absence of more information I'll just stick to trivia.

Did you know that the modern marathon course is 26 miles 385 yards long because that is the exact distance between Windsor Castle and the Royal Box at the old White City Stadium in the UK. When Britain hosted the 1908 Olympic Games they thought it would be a nice idea for some members of the Royal Family to be able to watch the start of the marathon at Windsor Castle and other members to watch the end of the race at White City. So they simply re-arranged the course to fit around the Monarchy.

That brings me neatly back to my last properly written and researched post about there being 100 days until the start of the 2012 Olympics. So it's seems to be a good point to explain that I'll be trying to move towards a lower volume of higher quality posts. After all this going at 100mph one day and doing next to nothing the next is not great especially considering the old bi-polar thing. So at around 22:20 I'll now be making my way to bed warm rather then drunk.

The French Result Are In.

I'm sorry for the delay it's just that at around 19:30GMT on 22/4/12 I've been having dinner and watching a film called "Post Grad" on TV. It's quite a gentle comedy providing you know enough about "Gilmore Girls" to get the one big joke.

Anyway the preliminary exit polls for the first round of the French Presidential election have been released. They suggest that Socialist Party candidate Francois Hollande with 27.5% of the vote will meet incumbent Nicholas Sarkozy of the centre right UMP party with 25.6% of the vote in the second round run-off on May 6th. Under these circumstances I have to say that I'm backing Sarkozy for the simple reason of the economy. Although populist Hollande's policies like a 75% top rate of income tax are simply unworkable given the current economic situation in the Eurozone and the wider global economy. Of course most of my opinion is based on the Economist magazine's controversial analysis. However I have to say that while they're often wrong on social/political issues on purely economic issues they generally know what they're talking about which is more then can be said about Hollande.

Now I've obviously got to go out and do my own research before making my final decision while Sarkozy has got to find a way of turning round a campaign that has to some extent been based on his opposition to me.

The Bahrain Grand Prix is Over.

And I have little idea what happened. In part this is because I don't have SkyTV but mainly because the footage provided by the host nation had this uncanny knack of missing all the important things. This is actually frustratingly common in Formula 1 but on this occasion it seemed appropriate.

Apparently the race was won by Vettel for the Red Bull team and Raikkonen came second giving the Lotus F1 team their first podium finish in the best part of twenty years. Although some protesters did make it into the circuit they were arrested before they were able to do something stupid like throwing themselves in front of a car moving at around 200mph/320kph.

In hosting the race the Bahraini Monarchy were trying to show that life is back to normal in Bahrain. With rioting every night, tear gas, petrol bombs and live ammunition flying around and at least one death I would say they've achieved that because that's pretty much been every day in Bahrain since February 15th 2011.

Operation Ostrava: Month 14, Week 3, Day 1.

As it has been crunch week I have little idea of what has been happening on the ground in Syria this week.

On crunch day itself - Thursday (19/4/12) the Syria Contact Group held it's third meeting in Paris, France. However co-inciding as it did with the International Monetary Fund (IMF) meeting in Washington, the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR) Summit in Brighton, the Indian missile test, the Breivik trial in Norway, preparations for the first round of the French Presidential election and preparations for the Bahrain Formula 1 Grand Prix this received little media attention. That though seems to indicate that very little happened. The Syria Contact Group's main objective is to turn the disparate groups that make up the Saudi Irregular Army (SIA) into a credible alternative to the Syrian government. This is proving to be a difficult task that is going to take quite some time. The other problem presented to the Syria Contact Group is that it is also meant to provide momentum to the SIA. The plan was that the third meeting would do this by expressing outrage at the Syrian governments defiance of the international community by refusing to agree to a ceasefire. As the Syrian government has already agreed to and begun to implement a ceasefire this left the Syria Contact Group without a clear purpose.

On Saturday (21/4/12) the United Nations Security Council unanimously passed resolution 2043(2012). However rather then being something directly affecting the Syrian government this was more for the United Nation's (UN) benefit. It authorises the UN Secretary General to deploy up to 300 unarmed observers and an unspecified number of civilian and political experts to Syria for up to 90 days under the banner of the United Nations Supervision Mission in Syria (UNSMIS) if he sees the need to do so, nations volunteer personnel to the mission and the Syrian government gives it's permission.

The Russian authored text that can be read here; http://www.rusemb.org.uk/foreignpolicy/74 is much more balanced then last Saturday's (14/4/12) resolution 2042(2012). For example the second paragraph of the main body of the text beginning; "Calls on the Syrian government to implement visibly it's commitments" points out that rather then agreeing to implement Annan's six point plan (S/PRST/2012/6) in it's entirety the Syrian government has so far only agreed to implement the first three parts of the second point relating the cessation of troops movements, the use of heavy weapons and a pull back of troops. Therefore it can't be held to parts of the plan that it hasn't agreed to implement. Although 2043(2012) does go on to call on the Syrian government to fully implement S/PRST/2012/6 it also states that this along with the operation of UNSMIS must be done with the agreement of the Syrian government. Therefore the Syrian government has the right not to agree without risk of automatic sanction by the UNSC.

Dutch Train Crash.

Yesterday (21/4/12) 125 people were injured in the Netherlands when two commuter trains collided near Amsterdam. Speaking with minimal information and possibly crashing the end of the Bahrain Grand Prix I would say that this is a response to the Belgian Bus Crash.

For the last five years or so disagreements between the Flemish of "Dutch" speaking parts of Belgium and the French speaking parts of Belgium have left the country without a functioning government. In this time the nations was run by the Monarchy and the civil service who were particularly violent with the Halle train crash in 2010 and the gun and grenade attack in Leige in December 2011. Belgium now has a functioning government so the internal element of the Belgian Bus Crash was to provoke a discussion between the Monarchy and the new government over what is considered acceptable behaviour. The Netherlands train crash appears to be an attempt by the Netherlands to influence the Dutch half of that discussion while the French half is distracted by the first round of the French Presidential election.

It also seems to be a stress response to the recent Pakistan air crash which coming the day after the Indian missile test was a bit random.

Security For the Bahrain GP Must Be Tight.

Because even though I'm some 4000 miles/5000 kilometres away that's the only explanation I can think of why there was a police van parked outside by house this morning (21/4/12)

Anyway reports are beginning to emerge that one protester was killed by the police in Bahrain overnight. If nothing else the fact that one death is considered newsworthy really highlights the difference between the protesters in Bahrain that we're not supporting and the "protesters" in Syria that we are.

Good Morning.

It is currently around 10:50GMT on 20/4/12 and my home Internet connection is working but once again I've woken up late with a massive hangover. Today I really need to get some exercise - probably 30 minutes static cycling - and do boring house hold stuff. As a result I probably won't be writing or publishing a statement on the Formula 1 Bahrain Grand Prix because as I said I've got a massive hangover. However I will say this;

In Libya and Syria the international community was apoplectic with rage that those nations security forces were shooting protesters with live ammunition. Now I am not justifying shooting protesters with live ammunition but generally when it is done it is done to scare and disperse protesters rather then to kill. Not in Bahrain though. There not only do they shoot protesters afterwards they go round the hospitals searching for doctors who have dared to treat wounded protesters. Those doctors are themselves arrested and put to death. However you do not hear the international community being outraged. This might have something to do with the USA's warm water port in the country. That and the fact Bahrain's Sovereign wealth fund owns lots of things including most Formula 1 Grand Prix teams.

No F*ck it I've Had Enough

So at around 23:00 on 19/4/12 I'm going. I wish I could remember what sent that way. But at around 23:05 I would like to thank both the Guns and the Roses for their patience.

And There's the War Pigs.

It turns out that at around 22:45 on 19/4/12 my father has not gone to bed so I'm left choosing between This Week on BBC1 and the Paper Review on Sky News.

Sorry But It's All Gone a Bit Metal.

So at around 22:25GMT I'll show my age by saying I prefered the Busta Rhymes version.

But you know if my feet of lead can carry me to the Black Lion they can certainly drag me upstairs to collect my favourite tie from the Ashes.

Because at around 22:30 Question Time is about to finish and my father still hasn't gone to bed.

What You Really Read This Sh*t?!

Because at around 21:50 on 19/4/12 if the answer is yes then I think I really need to read it too. But you know I've suffered enough having to write it.

Much before that I'd love to tell you the rest of Brian Paddick at the Oval story. Unfortunately I can't remember it. But after we'd got sent down from Paddick I was passed on to this white South African (Safa). I asked him searching questions about what we were searching for and he said; "Bombs. A little plastic box with wires hanging out if it. If it ticks poke it with a sick and if goes bang! its a bomb.

Anyway at around 21:51 my father and I searched the fu*k out of that corner. In fact we set so much of a course record for searching we were awarded a bonus. Sadly the agents stole that bonus but I believe they've since been incorporated into G4S.

So after a successful spellcheck I'm looking for work in the Merc feild but maybe not because at around 21:56 I'm also got a long arsed story about my army cousin and his other career as a fuel tanker driver.

Nope I Meant the Oval.

Not Lords. I mean at around 21;30GMT on 19/4/12 I could go upstairs and check. I mean I've got a memorial tie and everything.

Any Which Way But F*cked.

At around 21:20GMT that is double-y my review of the London Mayoral Debate and Two Broke Girls. Turns out they've got a full series even if the blonde one looks like a Welsh lass I used to know at #10 Grande Parade while the other one is giving it her best Kutcher.

As for the Mayoral debate the sad fact is that at around 21:25 I know more about the Egyptian Presidential. However I like Brian Paddick after all he gave me one of my first job interviews. I'm not saying it was the softest interview I've ever been giving basicall the Real IRA where on a rampage and John Major was on the Blue List so they called ugly f*ckers like me up to Lords.

Quick pause at aroudn 21:26 on 19/4/12 because according to Google some words have disappeared

At Least I'm a Man of My Digital Word.

Because since my last post I've been adding the three previously mentioned songs to my iPod. Turns out when you're away from an Internet connection you've got to insert every last detail yourself. So I got bored and rolled a long one.

Anyway at around 20:25 on 19/4/12 I going out to smoke it but actually thinking about it after spending that much time on a laptop even I could write a program going;

I'm still alive

I'm still alive

I'm still alive

I'm still alive

But where's the fun in that? 20:30.

Look At Me Now.

By the Volcanoes. That along with New Millennium Homes by Rage Against The Machine and New Way New Life by Asian Dub Foundation are definitely going to be added to by iPod because it turns out at least one of them are on there already.

Anyway at around 19:50GMT on 19/4/12 I've just got back from the shop by the park where I brought four Budweiser tallboys - at 500ml they're the new Stella Artios. So it looks like my review of the London Mayrol Debate on Sky News is going to have to wait because it's on like now so ssshhh!

Actually thinking about it at around 19:55 if I had some TNT I could have made that a much shorter walk.

I Think My Gas May Be Faulty.

I mean I stuck the sausage lattice in the oven on gas mark five at around 17:20GMT on 19/4/12. By around 18:00 it was still not done so I gave it and the chips the full beans. The chips were done by about 18:10 but the lattice took until about 18:15. I put the frozen peas on the stove at 18:10 but they weren't done until around 18:25. As a result my father and I didn't sit down to eat until around 18:30. I finished at around 18:40 and now I'm here.

So if the European Court of Human Rights (ECHR) get a few moments in the second day of their Brighton conference tomorrow (20/4/12) can you answer this simple question; Now we've established that I'm number 50's energy supplier does that mean I can enter the property anytime I like to recover a debt? I mean if I were to get the Crown exemption in writing I'll happily end it tonight.

Anyway at around 18:50 I deciding what to watch on TV. There's Watchdog on BBC1, the London Mayoral Debate on Sky News and the Two Broke Girls pilot on E4. All I know is that if I have to go out again it's going to be a long one.

Service!

As we're only having sausage lattice this evening I've also been doing the preperation work for tomorrows dinner. This is a lamb stew of which the main ingredients are; onion, garlic, chilli peppers, carrots, lamb, tomatoes and wine. After a few spliffs and a beer I though this was an achievement that demanded recognition.

Anyway at around 19:05GMT on 19/4/12 I'm off to eat sausage lattice. This is basically pork sausage meat wrapped in pastry baked and then served with chips and peas. I'm not convinced this is a good idea.

The Bathroom is Clean.

And in record time too. I went with Rage Against the Machine because I decided they're in enough trouble already. It was so loud I must have missed the sound of the removal team cleaning out number 50.

Anyway as I result I am still none the wiser about the name of the Brighton's answer to Justin Beiber but I think it's along the lines of Conner Some-Shite-Or-Other. Perhaps the point I was trying to make was that people shouldn't be too concerned about finalising the bracketed phrases.

Anyway it turns out the Eurovision Song Contest is going to be in Azerbaijan this year. Apparently they won it last year by flying the flag of the Libyan Monarch. But seeing as how Britain is taking it seriously now surely it's time to introduce a pop video round.

Now at around 16:35GMT on 19/4/12 I'm thinking that if I'm going have to put out a statement about the Bahrain Formula 1 Grand Prix I'm going to have to carefully draft the language. Or I might just get drunk.

I'm Not Saying My Garden's Big But..

Sometimes I get jet lag walking from one end of it to the other.

As a result it looks like I won't be able to get down to Brighton this weekend. So if it does kick off can someone give that [name] chap a few slaps from me. If you're not aware of who [name] is don't worry he's just what happens when someone looks a Justin Beiber and says; "You know what, I don't think one of those is enough."

Which brings me not so neatly onto the front page of today's (19/4/12) Sun Newspaper. Referring to the TV talent show "Britain's Got Talent" judge Simon Cowell the rival TV show talent show "The Voice UK" judge Jessie J the headline reads "Jessie Gay Simon not Gay" The is Simon Cowell gay? feature has been running all week so it actually a very long set up to take a swipe at Jessie J without her management noticing. If you're not aware of who Jessie J is then your life is a far richer place because she's a blatantly gay British mouthpeice/pop singer whose management have been running a "Is she gay isn't gay" marketing strategy to sell more records. Basically she's a pale imitation of what the Trinidadian/US signer Niki Minaj has been doing much more successfully. Minaj is pronounced "min-arge" but is spelled more "minge-ah." Minge being a slang term for female genitalia so a minge-ah would be one who eats female genitalia.

Anyway it's around 15:30GMT and things are getting that bad this early so I'm seriously considering cleaning the bathroom.

I Went For Soup Rather Then Chocolate.

Apparently it's more healthy.

Anyway at around 13:20GMT on 19/4/12 you'll be glad to know that after wandering round my local Tesco supermarket for twenty minutes trying not to bump into things none of the staff noticed anything different. I ended up buying; A sandwich and a wrap for lunch, some red chilli peppers for dinner tomorrow, two bottles of wine one of which I will boil for a couple of hours while making dinner tomorrow, two packets of vegetable soup powder because it was on offer, a copy of "The Sun" newspaper and a chicken tika masala ready meal because I don't yet think I've offended the Indian sub-continent enough for one day.

Then just as I was at the check out all ready to be served I remembered that I'd forgotten the frozen sausage lattice/pasty thing which I'm going to cook for dinner tonight and was the whole point of going to the supermarket in the first place. So I had to go around again. Fortunately I managed to miss the rain.

Anyway I've got to clean the bathroom later on so try not to get too excited.

Time For India's Anti-Sodomy Laws to Go Then.

I mean if they had a more open attitude to homosexuality at least the next time they're considering showing the world their massive, phallic rocket someone inside the country would feel confident enough to mock them. That's got to be better then being mocked internationally and having Bahrainis chucking petrol bombs at your Formula 1 team.

Anyway elsewhere in Brighton, UK an English Defence League (EDL) style group will be staging a St George's Day Parade on April 23rd. This is not normally the type of thing that Brighton puts up with. As a result security around the Brighton Conference is tight. Mind you the conference centre is just off West Street where the customers are violent and security is always tight. My advice is that if you come out of the centre facing the sea turn left and then take your first left followed by your second right. That will take you to a fairly nice pub called "The Fiddlers Elbow." Alternatively turn right and walk along the sea front. Eventually that will take you into Hove. In fact knowing Brighton there's probably at least one taxi driver offering guided tours of my old haunts.

Anyway it's currently around 12:35GMT on 19/4/12 and I'm considering going to the supermarket to buy dinner while a bit stoned. This may result in chocolate.

The Brighton Conference.

Britain is currently trying to use it's six month Presidency of the Council of Europe to reform the Europe Court of Human Rights (ECHR). This is the equivalent of putting a fox in charge of a hen house or a paedophile in charge of a nursery school or feel free to insert your own culturally acceptable description of a very bad idea. However Britain is today (19/4/12) hosting a mulit-national conference on ECHR reform in Brighton.

The main thing that Britain is pushing for is enshrining the ECHR's subsidiarity which basically means that it will not longer be able to over-rule national courts. For the small number of often quite silly cases that Britain brings before the ECHR this sounds like a good idea but in countries like Russia and Kyrgystan where the ECHR does the bulk of it's work this will have a very serious impact giving people no recourse against very corrupt local courts.

Obviously the main story at the conference will be Britain's attempts to deport Abu Qatada to Jordan. Complex as that case is it is also being used as a metaphor for my grandmother's Court of Protection (COP) case. The British plan was that I would immediately appeal the COP's December decision meaning I would have spent the first part of 2012 so caught up in legal and domestic stress I would have been totally incapable of commenting on things like Libya and Syria. In order to pressure me into appealing Britain made a lot of noise about the fact there is a three month time limit to mount an appeal in criminal cases. This was even a major theme in the BBC drama "Public Enemies" with Anna Friel and Daniel Mays. The only problem is that the COP case was a civil case rather then a criminal case so the time limit doesn't apply. Funnily enough some of the best legal minds in Europe worked that one out for themselves and informed Britain of this by telling them that the time limit for Qatada's appeal has not expired.

There is also the issue that while Britain wishes for the COP judgement to be viewed as an isolated error by a Judge having a bad day other people could view it as part of a pattern of behaviour that constitutes a criminal conspiracy. If you consider it to be that latter then the obligation is not on me to appeal but on the Crown to prosecute or to be left open to possible prosecution by the International Criminal Court (ICC). This debate is being covered by Abdelhakim Belhadj's attempts to prosecute members of the previous (Labour) British government over torture and extraordinary rendition.

The London Olympics: 100 Days to Go.

Today (18/4/12) marks 100 days until the start of the 2012 Olympic Games that are being held in London, UK. So it seems like an opportune moment to talk about the history of the modern Olympics which might surprise you because it's got very little to do with sporting excellence and even less to do with the ancient Greeks. Although the Greeks did hold some sort of sporting event near Mount Olympus it was a very different affair that bore little resemblance to the Olympic Games as we understand it. Then about 2000 years ago the Greeks decided it was far too silly stopped bothering.

The modern Olympics actually have their roots in the Shropshire town of Much Wenlock in Victorian England. Here a Doctor W.P Brookes noticed that the working classes were spending a lot of their free time in pubs and gambling dens. He decided that these sinful activity's were having a negative effect on the productivity of the working classes. So in 1841 he set up the "Much Wenlock Society for the Promulgation of Physical Culture" in order to save the poor from themselves by getting them involved in rigorous physical activity. In 1850 Much Wenlock hosted the inaugural "Brookes Olympian Games" with events such as running, jumping, blind wheelbarrow racing and pig racing. In 1866 Brookes tried turning his games into a national event by staging the first Modern Olympics at the Great Exhibition in Crystal Palace in London. This was a complete flop but it did bring the idea to the attention of a Baron Coubertin who used his power and influence to stage the first international Modern Olympics in Athens in 1896.

Baron Coubertin's Olympics co-incided with the birth of the industrial age and the start of globalisation as nations started to trade with each other on an unprecedented scale. However travel between nations was very time consuming and often hazardous. So the Olympics provided the perfect excuse for national governments and captains of industry to get together in the same place every four years. By rights the Olympics fad should have died out in the 1920's with the introduction of the first commercial aeroplanes. However the challenge of which nation/race produces the fastest and the strongest appealed proponents of the thoroughly discredited "science" of eugenics which was very popular at the time especially amongst people like Adolf Hitler who hosted the 1936 Games in Berlin.

The start of the Jet Age in the 1950's should have meant that the Olympics never re-emerged from their enforced break during the Second World War but the start of the Jet Age co-incided with the start of the Cold War. This saw the first and second worlds being almost totally cut off from each other by the Iron Curtain. So once again the Olympics found itself providing the perfect forum for east and west to meet up every four years in a highly tense and politically charged environment. Although the Cold War ended some twenty years ago the Olympics have continued as a way for nations and increasingly multi-national corporations to come together to compete with and intimidate each other. In fact you could say that the Olympic event that is most widely participated in is espionage.

As a result while there are many good reasons to protest against the Olympics I wouldn't attempt it because the risk of unintended consequences is far too high. For example campaigners against BP's sponsorship could well find themselves in the situation where their protest is the thing that caused the traffic congestion that caused the man to miss the meeting that would have prevented BP getting another large contract. That's not my idea of effective protest.

I Have Got a Splitting Headache.

Even by my hangover standards it's bad. At around 13:00GMT on 18/4/12 I've been up for about four hours and it only seems to be getting worse. I think a large part of the problem is my frustration at not being allowed to post what I wanted last night.

Although there are no promises post-pub I was hoping to explain how we are once again reaching a crunch point over the Eurozone with both China and the USA dancing around each other over how much they're prepared to the contribute to the so-called "firewall" around banks exposure to bad debt. The USA are using this as an opportunity to antagonise China by doing things like mocking their space program through the space shuttle Discovery's final trip to the Smithsonian museum piggy-backing aboard a jumbo jet. Personally I think the USA will get much further by engaging China is genuine conversations about things like carbon intensity. In negotiations over global warming/climate change carbon intensity rather then carbon emissions is China's preferred measure because rather then simply giving a total of emissions it adjusts for factors like population and economic activity.

Also I may have decided that after trailing it so extensively I need to explain further about the regional impacts of the Belgian bus crash even if I was in no position to do so. I'm still not really in a position to go into much detail but here's the short version; The Belgian bus crash put a lot of pressure on the government of Switzerland where the crash took place. Switzerland has come in for a lot of pressure from across Europe and the world to open up their famously secret bank accounts in the name of reducing tax evasion. However apart from reducing tax evasion opening up Swiss bank accounts also massively increases the control governments have over private citizens and business. Another example of this would be proposals in the 2012 British Budget to make it more difficult for rich individuals to donate money to charities. This is important because private enterprise and the charity sector make up a large part of what is known as "civil society" which is basically everything between the state and private family life. The US paper argued that one of the main problem with bringing democracy to the Arab middle-east is that successive dictators have restricted the activities of the civil society to the point where it doesn't really exist.

So by forcing the Swiss banks to open up their accounts and stopping people giving money to charity all in name of stopping tax evasion it seems that rather then trying to bring democracy to the Arab middle-east nations like Britain are trying to make the democratic world more like the Arab middle-east. I can't imagine why people would want to stop my posting things like that.

F*ck It. I'm Going to Bed.

Because tomorrow 18/4/12 is new day. However I warn you it is a Wednesday so I may be taking it off for religious observance or some sh*t.

Technical Report. Technical Report.

If my home Internet connection is working it's around 23:15 on 17/4/12.

However adjusting for British Summer Time it is around 00:16 on 18/4/12 and the analogue/VHF TV signal from the Crystal Palace tower has been switched off making it the end of analogue/VHF TV in the UK. Although I long since ran out of analogue/VHF TV's I can report that at least one of my Digital/UHF Freeview TV's and my Freesat TV is working fine.

More importantly and slightly irrelevantly long before that I upgraded my alarm clock to UHF/DAB version because I mean it's not like the VHF radio signal is going to be turned off anytime soon?! Anyway it was this/yesterday (17/4/12) morning that I realised I could get radio channels other then "BBC Radio1" so I decided to test them out. Turns out I can now receive British Forces Broadcasting Service (BFBS). I mean I can receive it but I can't understand it but it turns out the weather in Afghanistan is described as "Dusty."

Anyway as for tomorrow I'm just going to pick a channel at random and go with it.

I Stand by my Earlier Statement.

I believe it was something along the lines of "Now I'm Just Wasting Good Weed."

Hopefully at around 22:40 on 17/4/12 I hope my home Internet connection is working because apparently it failed at around 19:00 and I was prevented from telling you 100 and 1 wonderful stories. For example at around 19:20 I could have told you how the cheap, Chinese, incandescent light bulb in my bedroom blew and I'm waiting until day light to find out if it took the whole upstairs lighting circuit with it.

Anyway no-one mention "carbon intensity" because the Asian markets have just opened and I'm off to the Black Lion/Gym/Pub to get stoned.

And Now I'll Try and Read my Twitter Feed.

With luck at around 22:15.

Yes that's four Tweets all present and correct beginning with "Maybe I've published maybe I haven't 19:20 17/4/12" and ending with "That'll be a big fat no then. 21:20 17/4/12."

You will notice the suffix "hh:mm dd/mm/yy" which means my Internet is not working even if at around 22:20 on 17/4/12 I'm still boycotting British Summer Time (BST) and my home Internet connection is working?

Now I'm Just wasting Good Weed.

or am I? 22:10 17/4/12.

Edited at around 23:07bst/22:08GMT. It turns out I am. If you've been reading my Twitter you will know that my home Internet connection has been failing since around 19:00GMT on 17/4/12.

So at around 22:09 I think it's a good time to look at the posts I could've publcished;

I'm Back From the Pub.

It's around 19:00 GMT on 17/4/12.

You remember the pub. It's the J.D Wetherspoons opposite Thornton Heath railway station and below the offices of both Croydon Council and the Metropolitan Police's local Safer Neighbourhoods Team (SNT). As a result this trip has been something of a chore. For maximum annoyance my father insisted on stopping off to buy chocolate knowing full well that I was going to insist of stopping off to buy beer on the way back. Turns out you can buy both beer and chocolate in the same shop. He went for Cabury's Dairy Milk while I went for Budweiser. You will understand that this is not out of any affection for the USA it's just I've been tasting the local (British) reciepe recenently and it turns out for once it doesn't taste like p*ss. In fact it might even be the new Stella Artois.

Anyway we arrived in the pub to discover that rather then showing news they were showing the highlights of 20/20 Indian Premier League on ITV4. You will note that I hesitate to use the word "cricket." As a result there were a group of Indians sitting at our usual table so my father instantly started with racisim. Realising his mistake he tried turning his racisim into a coded discussion about my grandmother. As a result I half-smoked a lot (two) cigarettes and had the beef burger to avoid food poisoning. You will also note that while I spoke about it on my blog I failed to report the pub to the Food Standards Agency because I thought it was a problem with the customer rather then a problem with the kitchen. In fact if they had a suggestion box the management of the J.D Wetherspoons chain could now be reading a lenghty explanation of why they need to sychronise their "Steak Night" promotion with the nights ITV are allowed to show live Champions League football games. After all I'm sure it won't have a negative impact on ITV's takings.

B*llocks at around 19:20 we're going live and without spellcheck.

and;

Or am I not. At around 21:20GMT on 17/4/12 it's really just Google and Microsoft conspiring with each other to pretend they're under ceaseless attack.