Wednesday 30 September 2009

Gordon Brown's Conference Speech.

I know, over a day late and distinctly half-arsed. Who says satire is dead. I've finally read Gordon Brown's speech to the Labour party conference. Well not all of it because I got fingernails to watch grow but I am particularly intrested in specific passage in which Brown said;

"And I do think it is time to address a problem that for far too long has gone unspoken, the number of children having children. For it cannot be right for a girl of sixteen to get pregnant, be given the keys to a council flat and be left on her own.
From now on all 16 and 17 year old parents who get support from the taxpayer will be placed in a network of supervised homes. These shared homes will offer not just a roof over their heads but a new start in life where they learn responsibility and how to raise their children properly. That's better for them, better for their babies and better for us in the long run."

This policy announcement must've played very well with the party delegates as they discussed the speech in the bars, restaurants and verandas of Brighton. You see at their party conference the fascist British National Party (BNP) announced exactly the same policy although they managed to do it with less Arbeit Macht Frei* rhetoric. This convergence of policy should have allowed the younger Labour party delegates to convince themselves that the party leadership was finally ready to take on the BNP on the policies and in the Labour heartlands where they've been gaining ground. It also gave the older delegates and policy geeks the opportunity to point out that this was originally a Labour party policy from their first term that was never put into action. That last point is not strictly speaking true because the policy is already up and running in Croydon.

The house directly next to mine (#50) is a four roomed, semi-detached family home that has been taken over by the council. Since it was taken over it has been converted into a four bed roomed, student style accommodation that is used to house young people (mainly girls) on the councils housing list in a sort of glorified bail hostel. After around 11 months of me stopping seeing this Rebbecca girl and she had still failed to give birth Croydon council began housing young, single mothers in this supervised property. The thinking seems to be that after promising the world that I would soon be settling down with a girlfriend and a baby and failing to deliver the council decided that they would deliver potential girlfriends with ready made babies straight to my door. The hope was that I would fall in love, face up to my Council issued responsibilities and finally respect their authority!!!! That hasn't happened yet and apparently today is the day that Britain is being forced to re-tune the box(500).

*I kid you not. The English translation of that phrase is the driving force or recurring meme at the heart of the Labour party's welfare reform policy. When I heard a council official, at a meeting about mental health reform, recite it with no recognition of what he'd just said I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.

The Croydon Network Have Been on the March Again.

Last night at around 02:30 the usual suspect once again tried to break into my shed to steal the food we'd brought at the supermarket earlier that day. He was disturbed by the animals and ran away with no property being stolen and no damage done. As you have probably guessed by now we are not dealing with master criminals here.

Now as happened last time the British state will start claiming that we should all feel sorry for the drunk man because he was only trying to steal my food because he can't afford to buy his own. If that is the case then the three square meals he would get in prison should be reward enough.

Of course I will bring the matter up with the police later on however if they fail to resolve the matter to my satisfaction I'll just use the incident as motivation to twist the knife in further when the time comes. I believe the moral of the story is that if you are going to go to law you should do so with clean hands. If you're going to go to war you should do so with strong arms.

Tuesday 29 September 2009

I'm Back For the Evening.

The preliminary autopsy reports are back on that girl that died after receiving the HPV vaccine and they are being reported as saying the vaccine played no part in the death. That's is misleading reporting because the statement by the health authority actually says that the girl had a serious underlying medical condition that makes it highly unlikely that the [normal] vaccine caused the death. Although the actual vaccine used has already been synthesised by the bodies of the people it was injected into that autopsy report supports my earlier assessment. That is a person with a pre-existing condition that makes them susceptible to the vaccine met a souped up version of the vaccine bringing the chances of death down from 1:1,000,000 to 1:1. It's a variation on the theme of a binary poison.

Now that massive boost to my ego has made me all reminisical I can confirm that when I was about 11 I did indeed have meningitis. Got sick for about a week and then got better so I don't see what all the fuss is about it's not much worse the the seasonal flu. Also I have managed to catch a bit of Gordon Brown's speech and he made an awful lot of noise about single mothers being dumped in council houses. If that's his counter-argument I refer him to my earlier statement;

"If anyone feels that I have any legal, financial or moral obligation to any child born in Croydon I suggest the pursue that matter in open court."

I can make that statement safe in the knowledge that they won't because if they did, even without bringing up Bristol matters, the judge would have no other option then to rule that Croydon council owe me a large sum of money and key members of Croydon council will have to go to jail.

Edited to add; Of course there is no baby. You're first clue should have been when the Brits started claiming that the gestation period for human preganancy was 15 months ffs! Sorry for the ranting gibberish but tommorrow my fahter is going to another one of his "carers meeting" with Croydon council. In order to go to this meeting he has to fail to take my grandmother to the supermarket an activity that you would think falls under the definition of "caring" now I am either too drunk or not drunk enough to deal with that level of cognitive dissonance.

HPV Vaccine Death

Yesterday (28/9/09/), as happens almost daily in the United Kingdom, a group of 14 year old girls received their compulsory vaccination against the Human Pappiloma Virus (HPV) certain strains of which can, under certain circumstances cause cervical cancer. On this occasion at the Blue Coat Church of England School in Coventry something went wrong as one of the girls dropped dead within hours of receiving the Ceravix jab. Far from being a random accident this death was orchestrated from within the British State either by spiking the batch of vaccine used or by giving it to someone whose previous medical history indicated that they were likely to suffer an extreme, adverse reaction. Although for maximum denability it was probably a combination of both.

The reason for this little stunt is that Britain's current Labour government have finally and correctly been identified as a clear and present threat to the safety of the nation and as such will be removed from power at the next General Election. Once this happens in May 2010 Britain will begin a period of healing during which some of the Labour party's more damaging policies and laws will be revoked. As, by that point, the Labour Party will have been in power for 13 years this will be a very long list but some of the items at the very top will be the National Identity Database, the Human Fertilization Act 2008, civil partnerships, the gay age of consent and HPV vaccination program. Therefore this health scare has been created so the British State can assess how tolerant the British public will be to the removal of this program and possibly even create such a panic over the vaccine that the state is able to dodge making the difficult decision. The story also has elements of the current global debate over the Swine Flu vaccine and while that is mainly just a cover story Britain needs to have an urgent debate over the matter because there are two vaccines available. The one that works and the one that the NHS have brought. It is also interesting to note that the dead girl was a Church of England Protestant. I guess that proves that it doesn't matter where you go to Church or where you went to school, there ain't nothing you can do to sate Britain's blood lust.

While I'm here I should also clarify the Pilkington case. This story that climaxed yesterday tells of a mother and her disabled daughter who were driven to suicide by a violent gang of anti-social chavs on their housing estate. The Coroner's inquest that concluded yesterday ruled that the mother had committed suicide and unlawfully killed her daughter. The Coroner also ruled that the local police and the local council were liable for the deaths through their inaction. This may have given some people the impression that Britain is now going to get tough on the Croydon network that has been responsible for so much anti-social behaviour. Nothing could be further from the truth because I understand that the Croydon network has recently received a sizable financial reward for it's behaviour. The true purpose of the story was to scare the members of the Croydon network whose loyalty has been coerced and to intimidate my mother into complying with the latest round of my sisters [mis]treatment. So now what was I saying about when the state knows it's running out of road it will tell every lie and throw every threat in a desperate attempt to scare people into giving it more road.

Oh and Gordon Brown's been giving his speech to the Labour party conference today. I didn't bother watch it myself because all he was trying to do was pacify the party faith full so they'll walk quietly into the slaughter.

Monday 28 September 2009

I Happen to Think That Went Rather Well.

Last week was a busy one in politics. The Liberal Democrat party held their party conference and their leader announced that he wanted to be the next British Prime Minister to which his own audience responded with a silent cry of "Well you've joined the wrong party there then!" The Scottish Parliament returned from its summer break and held earnest debates into procedural tedium. In the small moments I was able to tear myself away from that adrenaline ride of domestic politics I also heard rumours that there was little something going on in New York. To co-incide with the General Assembly of the United Nations the hyperactive US President, Barack Obama also called a UN Climate Change meeting, a meeting between the Israelis and the Palestinians and a G20 summit to address the challenges of the world economy.

With the global recession putting traditional western democracies in decline to the advantage of Communist China and middle eastern and sub Asian economies who are perhaps not as democratic as they should be this was a very risky strategy. That risk was only compounded by the fact that most of the meetings took place on United Nations Sovereign territory making it something of a diplomatic free for all. However by allowing all the nations in the world to spend a lot of face time with the President on neutral ground America has gone a long to convince the world that the isolationism and lunacy of the Bush era has come to an end. By staging President Zelaya's return to Honduras to co-incide with the General Assembly the CIA should have been able to quash any lingering and entirely false allegations that they were behind the original coup. That was hampered slightly though by the fact that after just six days of psychological operations by the coup leaders Zelaya appears to have gone even more mad then he was to start with. America also managed to avoid the global warming trap that had been laid for them and the markets seem confident that no real progress was made on increased regulation of the banking sector. As I've seen no evidence of any serious security breaches I would have to say the only real mistake was the announcement of Iran's second enrichment plant. This will make it hard not to place actual sanctions on the actual Iran at Thursday's meeting and well if you wanted to avoid a nuclear middle east you're about 40 years too late. I would say though that now might be a good time for the big, bad CIA to openly and honestly tell their new commander in chief what happened when I went toe to toe with them and by toe to toe I mean they outnumbered me by about sixty to one.

Now by the sounds of things my father, my mother, my grandmother, my brother and my sister all still seem intent on dragging themselves down into oblivion as evidenced by the Pilkington case. So it looks like the worlds going to have to make room for me again because dealing with people who are committed to bringing about their own destruction doesn't half try the old patience.

Friday 25 September 2009

I'm Back and I've Cheered up a Bit.

Partly because I've heard an uncomfirmed report that the King of Thailand is in hospital which probably sounds more offensive then it's meant to be and partly because I've just been sent another recruitment ad for MI6 which is probably as offensive as it sounds.

That is all.

Good Morning.

I woke up today and felt rather good for all of three seconds then the reality sunk in that I'm still here in Croydon and my loved ones are still being raped and tortured so my blood began to boil. Over the next hour Britain gave an incorrect assesment of my driving history along with an incorrect assesment of their stratergy while my father headed off on another little rougue mission which will no doubt result in serious harm coming to my sister. Now we're a awaiting a discussion of Iran's nuclear program which is a non-issue if there ever was one and I'm sitting here asking myself if there is any action i can take that will improve my life?

Thursday 24 September 2009

To Arthur Guiness

Aiding drunken fucknuttery since 1759 so I've had to have a few to catch up.

Anyway we've had a cleaner round for two hours today so obviously everyone's spent the day doing housework while I try and debate if telling everyone what I got from that cleaner in about three seconds will make the leaders of the G20 nations more or less scared of me. She is either an east African Asian or dark enough to be a Tamil. Either way she came over here 40 ish years ago in order to work in the National Health Service. The immigration status of people from the former British colonies is vague at best but I feel it is dependent on whether they're still working for the NHS and the whole thing does remind me of that nasty incident when Canada changed it's immigration rules but forgot to tell anyone leaving around 3000 people effectively stateless.

Aside from that I've been watching a BBC 4 documentary about the history of TV cop shows that felt like a ketamine party gone wrong and discussing the driving test I took between the sword attack and the 9/11 attack which decided that despite spending a grand on driving lessons I'd managed to get 300% worse then driving. I do however feel I should clarify;

Since the last G20 summit the British Army's strategy in Afghanistan has been based on blowing up as much British stuff (helicopters and cannon fodder) in order to draw Barack Obama into a war and give the British people, for whom the Queen cares deeply, the impression that I am giving the Taliban the order to kill British troops which include my maternal cousin.

New HIV Vaccine

I've been forced to serve a stupid master for far too long to go into the scientific details of this story. However the World Health Organisation (WHO) has today announced that it has discovered a vaccine that prevents the transmission of a certain strain of HIV. As there are only three or possibly now four strains of HIV this vaccine could possibly cut worldwide infection rates by 30%.

The idea of releasing it today was that I would go into a big anarchist rant about why the leaders of the world's 20 richest nations think they have the right to decide private matters like that?!!! That question is proving a bit of a problem for the WHO who are currently trying to get a lot of people to take a swine flu vaccine Personally I got a sniff of the Thai Royal Family in the story so I'd rather take my chances with Swine Flu thanks.

In other news Peter Lord Mandelson, the former EU trade commission has been forced to spend the day touring the BRIT school for performing arts in Croydon. To everyone else this must have been deeply hilarious but I live in Croydon so several hours after the news of his visit spread a huge wave of depression followed as people slowly worked out that there is no greater insult you can give man then sending him to Croydon.

Alive But Depressed.

Last night, through no choice of my own, I watched a documentary called "Wounded." The BBC production told the stories of soldiers who had been horrifically wounded in Afghanistan as they battled to recover from their injuries. In short it was a hour and half of pure human misery. What made it worse was that I know enough about the British Army's strategy in Afghanistan to fully understand why the casualty rate has suddenly gone so high. However if were to publish that on the Internet I would be accused of jeopardising the mission and besides it reflects very badly on the Queen. I was also cast in the role of all the wounded soldiers so the scenes in the documentary were packed with lies, malicious lies and personal attacks. The stand out moment of these was when the narrator announced that a solider "would have to learn to walk through the pain." This reminded me of my three month exit from Brighton which was played out with severely bruised, possibly cracked ribs, torn foot ligaments and an 8 inch slash wound to my arm that became infected. Despite that I hit all my marks and retained enough composure that the Brits were forced to rely on those around me to fail for me to fall.

The main reason I'm depressed though is that the cleaner arrived an hour ago although has yet to do any cleaning. Although I gave it the best play I could with both hands metaphorically tied behind my back my father put his foot down so we do not have a copy of the passport of the non-white woman who does not speak with a British accent. Therefore if you want to know if she is entitled to work in the UK you will have to enquire of the British Crown. They are currently discussing the matter through the metaphor of a find of Anglo-Saxon gold that was today ruled as "treasure." This should force you to Google the Treasure Act 1996 which states in section 4 that all Treasure is the property of the Crown and in Section 2 that the Secretary of State has the power to alter the definition of treasure. Theatre aside my father now has no way to prove which cleaner exactly he was employing. Therefore it is my professional opinion that the Brits now have a clear head shot against my father so can close down this branch of the laboratory whenever it sees fit.

Wednesday 23 September 2009

The I'm Not Dead Thread.

As you may have noticed Britain is currently trying to kill me. It's got so obvious that they've been forced to issue a statement denying it and tone down the publicly visible aspects of the operation. The stuff that's going on in private is still going on at I would say an increased pace so I feel the need to reassure you all that I am not dead and have not been dead at any point since my last post. It is of course a logical impossibility for me to commit suicide because for a man to take his own life he must first be permitted his own life.

Sadly the news of me not being dead will actually give the Brits encouragement because they will now think that my will to survive is so strong that they will be able to force me into work. This is of course incorrect but the only other options I can think of to address the problem are;

1. Kill myself which presents a bit of an obvious problem.

2. Attempt to kill myself in the hope that my father will call an ambulance and I will survive. In the short term this will get me cut off from the world in a hospital under the close observation of Croydon based mental health professionals leaving my father free to inflict what ever level of destruction he's been ordered reap on my loved ones. In the long term it will guarantee me ongoing contact with the Croydon mental health which is a non-starter until the numerical list is completed in numerical order.

Incidentally my father is still flatly refusing to resolve this cleaner issue so it looks like I'm just going to have to knock him out safe in the knowledge that he will most certainly press charges.

Tuesday 22 September 2009

Another Busy Day

Today I've made three telephone calls;

1) I phoned by doctor to make an appointment. He is on holiday and apparently there are no other doctors in the surgery so the receptionist rather rudely put the phone down on me. I'm taking this as an indication that Croydon is now finding it rather difficult to live with the consequences of its choices.

2) I phoned the police to enquire as why they've yet to make arrests. I initially got the engaged tone twice. After getting through on the third attempt I found out that the officer in charge of the case has extended his holiday by phoning in sick and won't be available until Thursday at the earliest.

3) Attempted to phone my sister but she didn't answer. I didn't bother try a second time because I only wanted reassurance that she understands that the state knows it's running out of road and will therefore try and throw every lie and every threat at her so she gives them more road.

Later I will be getting dragged to the pub underneath the council office building by my father where we will discuss this cleaner issue once again. You could've guessed that was coming because the Baroness Scotland story is back in the news. There is of course another perspective to this story because my paternal grandfather who served as Royal Marine Commando and a Royal Military Policeman during the second world war once took his wife on a holiday to Grenada. The holiday didn't go so well because after about a week
Maurice Bishop staged a coup and my grandparents had to be evacuated alongside the Governor of the island. I believe that Baroness Scotland is part of that same network although we've never seen a penny out of her. I would ask my grandfather to clarify the details but he died soon after he returned so I guess there are worse things you can inflict on Britain then dead soldiers.

Whether or not Baroness Scotland is now forced to resign is a non-issue because peers don't get to resign. I do think the Crown should define what is meant by illegal immigrant though because I was born in this house and my family can trace it's roots in Britain much further then the Queen can.

Now I'll be off to deal with all that as quietly as possible while some people in Britain celebrate because hey hope people in Croydon will read this post and go; "100 years of loyal service and that family is still waiting for the queue to end." The Brits will then try and use that information to map how far you can push certain demographics before you start getting serious insurrection in the ranks.

Sunday 20 September 2009

Corrections & Clarifications

Yesterday I stated that the attack at St Andrews Church took place in 2000. This is of course incorrect because the attack actually took place on November 28th 1999. I made this mistake by quoting the date on a bravery commendation my father received to sounds of howls of laughter from the other 499 people in the church. Ideally I would now post of photograph of this commendation but the USB ports on my PC are still being blocked by GCHQ and the Americans still can't see a problem with that so I just have to describe it too you. It is a 10", silver plate inscribed with the words;

"Presented To
[people's names]
Who Have Been Placed On The 2001 New Year's Day Parade - London,
Roll of Honour
12th December 2000."

Now while New Years Day Parades are big news in the United States the 2001 London parade was such a non-event that neither I nor the media bothered turn up. Therefore I find it very hard not to conclude that although the attack took place just nine months after the start of the NATO mission in Kosovo someone in the British Establishment felt the need to make it a matter of public record that fresh attention was draw to the incident in 2001.

I've also managed to find a small photograph of the attacker taken before the attack online. Now if this man wasn't alive to speak for himself what religion would you guess he was a member of?

Photobucket


Saturday 19 September 2009

How Stupid Can One Man Be?

As I've mentioned before with the bills piling up and the current plan running out of road Britain is currently looking for way to breathe new life into it's operations. This involves searching for any excuse to delay my sister's recovery by extending her stay in hospital beyond the original six months and trying to get a cleaner into my grandmother's home. The last time they tried to introduce a cleaner into my father's home it lasted all of about 50 minutes so this time the Brits are engaging in a program of softening up. This involved staging a professional break-in at my grandmother's property during the night of 16th of September. Although property was moved around at the times on clocks were changed no property was stolen and there is no indication of how the perpetrator gained access to the address. This means the break-in was either carried out my MI5's in-house burglary division or a local agent operating with a degree of technical support.

The Brits also tried to build up confidence in the cleaner by attempting to disguise the fact she is being provided by the local health authority through Parchmore Road Medical Centre by focusing on the fact that she attends Saint Andrew's Roman Catholic Church. St Andrews Church represents an important event in my families history because in 2000 my Catholic mother attended a 10:00AM Sunday service and on this occasion my Protestant father, acting out of character, decided to join her. At around 10:15AM a schizophrenic of vaguely Muslim extraction walked in with a Samurai sword and began hacking the congregation into little bits. Although I didn't think about it at the time looking back the fact the attacker (Eden Strang) had been under the care of Croydon Mental Health service for a number of years makes it a certainty that the whole thing was staged. Following the principle that you can either get 100 people to sign up to an idea for 1 really good reason or 100 really bad ones this was done because;

1. By re-creating a scene straight out of the Rwandan genocide Britain were able to promote discussion over NATO's war in Kosovo which, at the time, the Brits were absolutely convinced was being fought for the benefit of the countries Muslim population.

2. It gives Britain plausible deniability if, as expected, the US became a victim of a mass causalty attack carried out by Muslim terrorists because they can always claim the incident as warning, albeit an obtuse one.

3. By portraying it as a religiously motivated attack the C of E Protestants hoped to be able to recruit Catholics into their Crusade against Islam. Of course this plan fell flat on it's face when rather then killing the attacker the congregation simply disarmed him and in doing so allowed the world to see that his tenuous religious heritage was secondary to the fact he was absolutely bat shit insane.

The Brits also tried to build up confidence in the new cleaner by announcing that that the UK's Attorney General, Baroness Scotland is to be investigated for allegedly employing an illegal immigrant as a domestic cleaner. This was designed to build the entirely false impression that the cleaner being proposed was not part of any British network or an "illegal immigrant". During the reporting of the story it emerged that under British law a private individual who employs a domestic cleaner for even just one hour a week has the same legal liability as any other employer to make sure the employee is permitted to work in the country. The maximum fine upon conviction is £50,000 which is more then enough to wipe out either my father or grandmother financially. This raises the possibility that the Brits are acting as agent provocateur in order to force my father into bankruptcy. Of course this threat is easily eliminated by simply checking the employees passport before they start work. I raised this point with my father yesterday and he flatly refused to do anything about it. Not because it would involve extra work but because he believes that if the British State are trying to destroy him then it is his duty to assist them.

Elsewhere Britain has gone on the defensive over the Godstone Farm E-Coli outbreak randomly closing similar farms across the country.

Edited to correct: I've looked it up on the Internet and the St Andrews sword attack took place on 28th November 1999 not 2000 which is the date on the bravery commendation my father received. I'm not sure if it's a good day or a bad day when you have to ask Google to remind you of traumatic events in your history.

Thursday 17 September 2009

Godstone Farm E-Coli Outbreak.

Godstone Farm is an open farm and children's activity centre in Godstone, Surrey. On August 8th 2009 a child who had been in contact with animals at the farm came down with Escherichia Coli 0157 (E-Coli), a particularly nasty bacterial infection the symptoms of which include vomiting, diarrhoea, kidney failure and death. Despite the relevant government agency being informed at the time no action was taken and the outbreak was allowed to peak yesterday (9/16) with 40 cases including 14 children who are seriously ill in hospital. Although E-Coli occurs naturally in farm animals it has been suggested the strain in the Godstone Farm outbreak was brought in from an outside source making the incident an example of bio-terrorism.

While Godstone farm is not technically within the London Borough of Croydon it is about 30 minutes drive from the town centre. As such it is a popular destination for Croydon school trips and for Croydon parents to take their children too during the long summer holiday. I personally can remember visiting the farm on a number of occasions and started hearing rumours that children who'd visited the farm were getting sick in the first week of September before the story got picked up by local, low-level news media the following week (9/7 onwards).

The Health Protection Agency's failure to take action to control the outbreak stems from a belief by the British Security Service that the American intelligence services are spying on a British spy network that is operating in Croydon. Although in espionage circles this is pretty much normal behaviour, even amongst allies, on this occasion the Brits have gone and got all upset. In response they decided to launch what a hacker would probably call a back trace in order to find out what, if any, information the Americans have gathered and how they went about doing it. The operation was planned to take place in the week of the September 11th anniversary because the Brits knew that event would leave the Americans mournful, distracted and therefore susceptible to attack.

At around dawn (local time) the Brits snapped and closed down Godstone Farm breaking the story internationally. This allowed journalists to talk to the families of those infected and changed the dynamic of the discussion into one of whether the farm (Croydon) has any future or whether it will have to be shutdown and all the animals destroyed. Personally I've been asking that question for years but the local authority seem unable to give the correct answer.

Wednesday 16 September 2009

Harrasment Update.

Over the past four weeks there has been a noticeable uptick in the levels of harassment around me. Apart from putting 14 kids in hospital with E-coli this has mainly been limited to neighbours banging on the walls and silent phone calls so it's been, you know, terrifying(!)

Part of the reason for this is an attempt to get me to drop this burglary business. That's because if I persist with it the Brits will have to work very hard to avoid jailing one of their own operatives and possibly roll up the entire network. The main reason though is that my sister's six month hospital placement is coming to an end and my brother will be out of contract in November. This means that the Brits much vaunted counter attack has not yet achieved a success and is fast running out of road. Therefore the Brit's will either have to admit defeat or come up with a new plan of attack which will inevitably suffer from the principle of diminishing returns.

Of course the American civil service know all this because they've been using that knowledge to help the Brits inhibit my ability to operate before complaining they're not getting the level of service they would like. Now whose going to build a ladder for Obama to climb down over this health care reform issue. While I agree with the plan in principle it is a sad fact of life that in Obama's first* term America can either afford an economic stimulus package or universal health care. Sadly the American civil service, worried by Gitmo issues, decided to side with the Brits ahead of the G20 summit so the Americans will have to live with the consequences of the judgement call. Personally I'm not American so it's no skin off my nose either way.

*The way things are going at the moment that should possibly read only.

Tuesday 15 September 2009

Oh Yeah.

I've been in contact with the police over that burglary. The officer in charge of the case is on holiday until next week so I didn't get to speak to him. The officer I did speak looked up the case on the computer and confirmed that fingerprints have been lifted from the scene but have not yet been identified. So basically we're in exactly the same position we were two weeks ago and I'm getting the general impression that everyone had been hoping that this would've gone away by now.

Monday 14 September 2009

CIA Try Their Hand at Comedy.

American TV networks have today been fascinated by a very funny video. The CCTV tape shows the scene from a convenience store when escaped steers from a local rodeo enter the store and start wandering the aisles. After a few minutes a couple of brave cowboys, still on their horses, come in and round up the errant cattle getting them out of the store before any serious damage is done.

The whole thing is remarkably similar to an incident that came out of Ireland earlier in the year when the US civil service were busy hazing their newly elected President. Therefore the incident seems to be a simple fishing trip born out of desperation. That desperation is understandable because the US security services are currently feeling a little stressed out. Not only have they been forced to endure the 8th anniversary of what was not their finest hour they're also wasting far too much energy trying to bring a premature Israeli/Palestinian peace process. Plus they don't seem to be as committed to resolving the British problem as perhaps they need to be.

Conversely the Brits are still in the grips of a complete nervous breakdown which is quite tedious but could lead to a slightly gory anecdote about how I busted my knee at a place called Godstone Farm although that's pretty much it. Anyway happy new year.

Saturday 12 September 2009

A Bad Week fo the Bad Guys!

Over the last seven days the runts of the litter of British fascism have been on the march again with limited success. On Saturday, September 7th the English Defence League (EDL) attempted to stage a protest against Islamofacism in Birmingham. After assembling in a pub on Broad street the EDL quickly gave up on any idea of staging a proper protest and instead went on a drunken wander around the city centre. By 13:30 they came into contact with around 20 Unite Against Fascism (UAF) counter demonstrators and fights broke out forcing the 80 or so EDL to scatter. Over the next two hours news of the clashes spread and around 800 local, Birmingham residents turned up to join in. This forced the EDL to seek refuge in a pub which was quickly cordoned off by the police. At around 15:30 the police were forced to commandeer two double Decker buses in order to evacuate the EDL from the city for their own safety. As the EDL were being driven away they decided to smash up the buses and throw the seats at passers by leading to all 80 of them getting arrested bringing the total number of arrests for the day to 90.

On Friday a group calling itself Stop the Islamification Of Europe (SIOE) decided that it would be a really clever idea to stage a protest against Islam outside London's largest Mosque in Harrow on September 11th, during Ramadan just after Friday prayers. Despite repeated offers from the Mosque to sit down and discuss their concerns peacefully the SIOE, which is little more then one man and his blog, decided to press ahead with their highly offensive demonstration. By 17:00 they'd assembled a massive 20 people including members of the EDL which was met by a 1000 strong counter demonstration called by Unite Against Fascism (UAF) and made up of young Muslim men from the Mosque alongside local residents of every creed and colour. At around 17:30 the SIOE group started goading the UAF group trying to start a fight. They got one when the UAF group charged them forcing the SIOE to retreat behind the police lines. By 18:15 the SIOE had been evacuated and were escorted from the scene by the police again for their own safety. Over the next 45 minutes or so the pumped up crowd had some minor scuffles with the police unaware that the SIOE had already left the area. By 20:00 it was all over as people melted away from the riot that never was leaving ten people arrested including the leader of SIOE Stephan (bullied at school) Gash on a charge of behaviour likely to cause a breach of the peace.

All in all it's been a pretty humiliating week for the British far right that's left them looking like they've had their backs broken. The EDL have got a number of demonstrations planned over the next couple of months, including one on tomorrow (13/9), but I doubt there will be much of a turnout especially as the Labour government seem to be getting very vocal in their opposition now the hard work's been done.

Thursday 3 September 2009

Release of the Lockerbie Bomber.

On August 20th Abdelbaset al-Megrahi, the Libyan man convicted of the 1988 bombing of Pan Am flight 103 over Lockerbie in Scotland was released from prison in Scotland on compassionate grounds. The release was actually put back by a week because in this metaphor I was playing the role of al-Megrahi and the flight 103 role was being played by President George W Bush's visit to London in 2003. Obviously for that to be accurate flight 103 would have had to have crashed because the pilot simply ran out of talent but the metaphor only really existed to distract from two inescapable facts;

1. Libya has the largest proven oil reserves in Africa. When all that capacity comes on line the country is expected to be the tenth largest oil producer in the world.

2.Britain is in a very sorry state of affairs. It's small strategic oil reserve commonly known as Scotland was plundered heavily during the miners strike and by successive Governments keen to cover up holes in their economic policies. It is now expected to run dry and contribute to the looming energy crisis which, according to a pessimistic report released on 1/9/09, is expected to hit Britain as soon as 2017.

Therefore the al-Megarhi release was simply an attempt by Britain to secure Libyan oil concessions and because the timescales involved exceed the length of any British Parliament was a matter for the civil service or "the state" rather then any elected political party. The fact that the final decision was left to the Scottish Government was an attempt to create a rift between Scotland and the English civil service in Whitehall. The thinking behind this is that economically speaking Scotland is an unsustainable disaster area so when the oil reserves run out Whitehall would prefer it if Scotland achieved independence and became the EU's economic problem.

Since the story exploded into an almighty row Britain has released an avalanche of documents to convince everyone that no oil concessions have been received in return for al-Megrahi's release. I for one believe them because I said it was a British plan, I didn't say it was a good plan.

Wednesday 2 September 2009

Climate Camp Have Done It!

Against the backdrop of a poor choice of location, expected hostility from the local residents and some quite frankly autumnal weather the Camp for Climate Action have just finished holding their summer camp on Blackheath South East London.

The week of events began on Wednesday August 26th when around 1000 environmental activists met up at several locations around central London before snaking through the city to swoop on the Blackheath campsite. Over the next two days they built a small tented village, played wide games, enjoyed entertainments and engaged with the local residents in workshops on the worlds environmental problems and how to solve them. On Friday 28th a group of around 100 protesters left the camp and headed off to stage a small protests outside the head office of Barclay's Bank. In their role as the British Government's dirty bank Barclay's are engaged in all sorts of unpleasant things that need protesting against but on this occasion the demonstrators were concerned with Barclay's involvement in the Canadian Tar Sands industry. This business involves stripping vast swathes of the Canadian wilderness of its tar sands through massive open cast mines. Once the tar has been mined it is taken to factories where huge amounts of energy are used crushing and squeezing it to extract a few drops of an oil that is far too dirty to be used to power automobiles. In short tar sands oil is one of the most environmentally damaging fossil fuels even before you get round to burning the stuff.

On Monday 31st another two small groups of campers left to stage two small, photogenic protests. The first of these involved protesters in overalls dusting and polishing the outside of the HM Treasury building to highlight the dirty little secret that for all it's claims of being a world leader on environmental issues the British Government actually spends large amounts of taxpayers money funding a range of environmentally damaging industries including the Canadian tar sands. The second group headed to London City Airport where they staged a small but noisy picket at the entrance in order to draw attention to the fact that most of the private jets that operate out of the airport often pump out huge amounts of greenhouses gases in order to fly planes with more crew then passengers on board.

Tuesday September 1st was the camps day of mass direct action and it started early. At around 9AM 12 activists blockaded the headquarters of the Royal Bank of Scotland and got the building shut down for the day while they carried out an "ethical renovation". At around the same time another group staged an always courageous naked protest at Edelman PR who represent E-on the energy company that operates the Kingsnorth and Ratcliffe-on-Soar coal fired power stations. Throughout the day these demonstrations were visited by a roaming group of protesters who also took in the Canadian Embassy and the head office of oil company BP before converging on the head office of Shell Oil who are heavily involved in the production of Canadian Tar Sands.

Although this wasn't the most spectacular camp in it's history this years Climate Camp has probably given the new environmental movement it's greatest victory. You see this year the Climate Camp was meant to be robbed, raped, beaten and abused to such an extent that it collapsed into a quivering, paranoid mess of infighting leaving it too busy to dare challenge the status quo ever again. That would mean that just 94 days ahead of the Copenhagen Summit Britain would be able to send the message to the world that the movement was broken so there's no need to sign up to a deal that would stop the Queen profiting from her large portfolio of mining and energy investments.

In the end that car crashed before it even got going http://www.newsshopper.co.uk/news/lewgreen/4561358.SHOOTERS_HILL__Man_seriously_hurt_in_crash_with_police_car/ because the camp was better defended and enjoyed more local support then was expected so you only need to read the hundreds of, ever more desperate, anonymous comments posted on the Internet while the Climate Campers were keeping their heads down to see that the movement's hardly even been dented.