Iran Detains Sailors Part 2.

Since my earlier post on the subject I've been doing some research. It turns out that yacht team were on their way to the start of the Dubai - Muscat yacht race. I'm not sure of the exact closing date for entries to this event but the team have certainly been preparing since July/August 2009. This means that when the operation was initially conceived it had two main objectives;

1. To portray Iran as something of a dangerous rogue state in order to help build a global consensus for military action against it.

2. With the Copenhagen summit starting on December 7th pushing Iran into the global spotlight brings up the confusion over the green revolution that dogged the G8 Summit.

As global events have moved on since then the operation has also picked up a number of ancillary objectives. These include;

1. Allowing Britain to gather intelligence on how diplomatic moves are progressing against Iran. At this point Britain knows so little that it would be difficult for me to complete this sentence without giving them further clues.

2. It provides a cover for what may or may not be happening in my domestic situation regarding health care and complaints against the police.

3. It allows the Brits test my loyalty and allow it to be discussed amongst the networks. This is a little unnecessary because I have explained at great length how the Bristol Abuse Case makes it legally and morally impossible for me to be loyal to the Brits. Besides if you were a religious man you may get the impression that God is not at Britain's back in that battle.

Things on the domestic front have been quite stressful today. This is because my father has been locked out of the national network. Aside from the obvious reason why this may have happened with an investigation pending there are three other possible explanations;

1. To stress him out.

2. To protect the national network.

3. To cover up the highly important work that it going on between him and my grandmother. This has mainly involved him spending the entire day with my grandmother trying to build a consensus about throwing me out of the house. I can't comment on how successful that may be but like I've said before we knew these days would come.

Iran Detain's Sailors.

In the last 100 minutes the British Foreign Office have announced that on November 25th five British civilian sailors were detained by Iranian forces while taking part in a yacht race. All that's happened here is that MI6 have sent five assets to invade Iranian territorial waters. The idea was to provoke the Iranian's into taking them prisoner so this "unjustified hostage taking" could be used as a beacon to get the global community to rally round the urgent need to take action against Iran.

As the five men are quite clearly spies Iran is more then entitled to chop them up into little pieces and post them home. Of course doing that would help the Brits to portray the Iranians as some sort of dangerous rogue state. However I don't think that the Brits are aware of the current state of negotiations regarding action on Iran so if I was an Iranian I wouldn't be that worried about being seen to be provocative. I do hope the Iranians hang onto the sailors for a while though because the flashback to similar events a few years doesn't half help me put the Brits in their place.

Personally I've spent the day properly typing up this letter to the police. Tomorrow I'll either post it or deliver it in person, I've yet to decide. The announcement about the sailors came within about a minute of me finishing this letter so the Brits have made that public in order to cover up how they intend to respond to this complaint.

Prince Charles Pays A Visit to Cockermouth.

Over the past two days Prince Charles has been visiting victims of the recent flooding in Cockermouth, Cumbria. Given how much he's paid for making a couple of public appearances a year* he was hardly going to burst into tears. However he looked particularly happy to be there. This is because theologians could argue that the Cumbrian floods were a sign from God that the Queen of England should stand down. If that happens then Prince Charles is first in line to the throne. That probably explains why he was sent to Cockermouth while the Queen headed out to Trinidad.

The other story that's been harassing my TV today is Tiger Woods car crash. Personally I don't see what all the fuss is about. To me it just looks like someone's got a bad case of the yips.

*Seriously the title "Duchy of Cornwall" translates as "Owns most of Cornwall."

Oh Dear, oh dear, oh dear.

Today the British Ministry of Justice have warned Clearsprings that their £4million private contract to run bail hostels may be terminated unless they improve their procedures. As I have previously described the housing association properties that are part of the Croydon network as being "one step up from bail hostels" this is clearly directed at them. The problem is that it is only warning. This is simply not acceptable. The Croydon network have already behaved in such a way as to forfeit their right to continue operating. Therefore this is the minimum outcome that I am entitled to so is the minimum outcome that I will settle for. Issuing warnings only makes it harder for the Brits to deliver that outcome. Long term readers may remember that I had almost this exact same conversation with the Brits back in March 2008. Now we're in November 2009 they may wish to revisit that earlier decision and ask themselves if they made a good choice.

I should also tell you that my father's main source for news and current events is the letters page on ITV Teletext. Yesterday, on the subject of the Basildon hospital scandal, someone texted in and said; "What do these hospital cleaners do all day, sit around drinking coffee and playing cards?" That is exactly what my father does while claiming to be caring for my grandmother. The upshot is that since reading it my father's finally gotten up out of his chair and has started doing something vaguely resembling actual work.

Sorry Wasn't That Made Clear

While the solicitor was round getting my grandmother to sign a property and affairs lasting power of attorney he also got her to sign a health and wellbeing LPA. This was unsolicited and signed within the home so would be invalid if it was a contract to change gas an electricity supplier. I was not included in it so it is my grandmothers wish that I have no input into her health care provision and medical treatment. I will be respecting this so any improvement in elderly care must now come for the talent pool of the Croydon network. My father tried to involve me a conversation about her treatment over dinner so I just ignored him which made him angry but left me calm, serene and silent. It does though mean that he seems intent on arguing any way which removes the block on me challenging the LPA. In doing so I will be giving the Crown the opportunity to either endorse or investigate and curtail the activities of the solicitor, David White & Co along which his associates at the Croydon branch of the Alzheimer's society and the local primary care trust.

Incidentally now it has emerged there is a clinical need for my grandmother to have a period of respite care the primary care trust have revoked their offer of respite care. Seriously I'm considering holding a wake for her now but it is a little hard to mourn those who sign their own death warrants.

Dubai Debt Crisis.

Yesterday (26/11) the Arab Emirate of Dubai announced that it is to delay repayment of it's large debts. The news sent shockwave around the worlds financial market with London Stock Exchange being forced to suspend trading for several hours although they tried to cover it up. This story touches on something I was planning to discuss in more detail in an almost well researched and properly written post. As part of it's plan to "revolutionise" the Borough Croydon Council heavily invested in property development between 2006 and 2008. This included the construction of up to a dozen large blocks or flats. Due to the credit crunch and the fact that Croydon has yet to become a desirable location the property developers are having serious trouble selling these properties. I believe that they've only been able to keep work going on a number of these construction sites due to discreet loans from central government. Therefore the British government is very concerned over Dubai's debt problems.

Today the Crown Prosecution Service announced that is has charged Baroness Scotland's former cleaner, Otolose Loloahi Tapui with a range of offences including holding a false passport. You may remember that Baroness Scotland's cleaner is something of a metaphor for the cleaner my father is employing to clean my mothers house. At the time of her employment I was quite annoyed about it but have since gone quiet on the matter. This is because we have not only managed to totally shut down her ability to act as an intelligence source we've also shifted her role away from domestic cleaner to a social care role such as bathing and dressing provided at one third of the market rate. The Croydon network are livid about this and are desperately trying to have her replaced by someone working for the local branches of either Help the Aged or The Alzheimer's Society. They are pretending this is because the replacement will be better placed to act as an intelligence source. I doubt this as they are likely to be less medically qualified then the current cleaner. Instead they just seem desperate to make sure that as much money as possible flows from my grandmother's bank accounts into their bank accounts. Such a great an noble cause they are fighting for.

I Warned You It Would Be A Long Day.

So I think I should clarify a few things.

My grandmother's television is a cathode ray Sony Triniton operating on an analogue signal. Therefore the only way the channels could be reorganised is if someone went into her house and used the remote control to navigate the various menus. I know that I did not do it and I know that she was not capable of doing it so there is only one person who could have done it. And throughout the days events my father has yet to show even one flicker of remorse.

It has been suggested that my grandmother's wandering this morning was a stunt to provide grounds for me to challenge this Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA). I do not think this is the case. Without going into too much detail over the past three days I have been seriously worried about my grandmother's mental state. For example when the police delivered her back to me this morning she was telling me how, on the way to the supermarket, she'd stopped and spoken to her sister who was dropping her (the sister's) grandson off at Kindergarten. The kindergarten is in Wales, the sister is dead and the grandson is in his twenties. What I think has happened is that the Croydon network, being as dumb as rocks, decided that the more messed up my grandmother gets the easier it will be for them to complete their task. As a result they have come in far too hard and in the process may have given me just enough rope to hang them with. However, based on past experience, I won't believe they will hang until I see them swinging from the gallows with my own eyes and that is not a metaphor.

I have yet to decide if I will contest this LPA. This is because the best outcome is that we will have to pay another £1000 to draw up another LPA. The worst outcome is that the state decides that my father is not a fit person to act as an attorney causing the state to take full authority over my grandmother's health care and personal affairs. Besides any further challenge will inevitably lead to arguments. When people argue they get stripped down to their rawest emotional form. In my situation arguments will cause my father to present himself to his contacts in his rawest form, my grandmother to present to her contacts in her rawest form and I may present to my contacts (this blog) in my rawest form. This is exactly what the Brits want to happen so is something I want to avoid. At the moment I don't think that this is a major problem but it is something that I must consider.

Apart from my stuff there have been developments in the story of the Anglo-Saxon gold which has today been valued at £3.285 million. When this story first emerged it may have had some significance but those days are long gone. Now it's just one of those stories that you can assign any meaning you like too. Personally I'm going to take it to mean that the Brits intend to remunerate me to the value of £3.285 million. This can't possibly be true because shortly after I took a sabbatical from Enterprise House the Brits entered into a binding agreement to pay me £150 per hour for every natural hour that passed until I returned. It's far too late at night to work out the exact figure but at this point last year it was certainly more then £4million.

This morning the former UK Ambassador to the United States, Sir Christopher Meyer gave evidence to the Iraq war inquiry. Although, for obvious reasons, I wasn't able to watch his appearance in full but I did watch enough to see him claim that it was President Bill Clinton's idea to invade Iraq before plugging his book. That means the Iraq war inquiry has already descended to the level of day time chat show.

There has also been a large fire today in Peckham, SE London. The fire started on a building site and quickly spread to two blocks of flats and pub. Over 300 people had to be evacuated from their homes and 8 people and 2 police officers had to be treated in hospital. The fire was most certainly arson. If the fact it started on a building site wasn't enough of a clue my grandmother lived in Peckham for a number of years so seeing her old neighbourhood on the TV has hardly helped her remember where she's living now. Incidentally the guys on the Richmond road building site are, at 23:54, still working away with an angle grinder and a sledge hammer.

Now if anyone needs me I'm about to make like a Cumbrian Bridge and collapse. Or not.

It Is Signed. I Have Failed.

The solicitor has been round and inspite of the fact that just two hours previously my grandmother had to be rescued by the police and at present is unable to remember if she has any grandchildren he feels she is mentally fit to sign a lasting power of attorney. Both my grandmother and father have both signed the document and the solicitor has provided a Part B Certificate. What happens next is that the LPA and the Part B Certificate are sent to the Office of Public Guardians (OPG). They will then notify the "named persons" to see if they have any objection to the LPA being registered. If there are no objections then the LPA becomes active.

What I will do next is write to the OPG detailing my grandmothers mental sate at the time the document was signed and the sustained period of psychological abuse she has been subjected to prior to the signing of the document. As my father has made very sure that I am not one of the "named persons" who can raise an objection the OPG are perfectly entitled to totally disregard my objections and throw my letter in the bin. However if the Crown is prepared to put it's money where it's mouth is and demonstrate that it is committed to bring this abuse to an end the OPG will refuse to register the document pending an investigation into the conduct of the Part B Certificate provider. I won't be holding my breath though.

Apart from that I don't know what else to do because this constant fighting is not doing anyone any good.

Now That's A Bit Much Before Breakfast.

At about 10:00 this morning my grandmother went missing. Just plain disappeared. This caused me and my father to go tearing around the neighbourhood looking for her. After about an hour the police got involved prompting a helicopter and mulit-unit search. In the end she was found quite quickly because she'd just popped up to the local supermarket to get a pint of milk. Fair point she did it without her walking frame, a coat or any money but she was safely on her way home when the police picked her up.

This little excursion will make it very difficult for her to certify this LPA later on today. That might make some people think I've been running some sort of scam. This is simply not the case because if no LPA exists then if mental incapacity can be proved by say wandering then the power of attorney falls directly to state meaning they can do what the hell they like. That makes me think that someone may indeed be running a scam. Anyway Mr Rock meet Mr Hardplace, I believe you're old friends.

The Solicitor Comes Tommorrow.

To get my grandmother to sign off on this Lasting Power of Attorney (LPA). I was discussing it this evening with my father and everything was so civil. Right up to the point that I asked if he'd explained to my grandmother that she can specify what powers this LPA grants and conditions in which they can be used. At this point he exploded into his usual ranting lunatic throwing out every threat under the sun and telling me not to discuss it with my grandmother or the solicitor. I then went over to discuss it with my grandmother and not only is she not aware of the terms of an LPA she actually thinks she's been asked to sign her will. I also noticed that someone had re tuned the channels on her TV so what would normally appear on channel 1 was appearing on channel 5 and so on. That's really confusing and not the sort of thing that would happen by accident.

Anyway this guy's coming round at 14:00 and if he thinks it appropriate to pressurise an old lady into signing a document that she has neither read nor understands I think we need to consider if he's an appropriate person to sell double glazing let alone practice law.

Unfair Bank Charges Case

Today (25/11) the Supreme Court of the UK which replace the Law Lords as Britain's highest court in October 2009* has ruled on a case brought by the Office of Fair Trading (OFT). The case, brought on behalf of millions of bank customers, tried to argue that the bank's practice of charging fees and interest on non-pre-arranged overdraft loans was unfair and therefore illegal meaning that the banks should repay the fees and interest payments. The Supreme Court ruled in favour of the banks accepting the argument that the fees were "part of the price or remuneration for the package of services the banks provide." This is hardly a surprise because, although it's an unpopular thing to say, British bank customers actually get a very good deal. In most of the rest of the world banks charge customers these sort of fees for simply having a bank account even if they stay in the black.

The argument over bank charges has been running for a long time (at least 4 years) and affects millions of British consumers. As such I don't think there's much of a subtext to the story. If there is though it's great news for me. I've long been described as "the bank" so the Supreme Court has ruled that the bank owes nothing to customers who refuse to stay in the black. This analysis is supported by last weeks so called "Dream Killer" case. That case involved a man who suffered from a sleep disorder similar to night terrors. During the course of one of these attacks he strangled his wife thinking that she was an intruder breaking into the house to kill him. On the third day of the trial the Crown Prosecution Service (CPS) dropped the prosecution accepting that the man was legitimate in thinking that he was killing an intruder.

Taken together these two cases seem to indicate that the British Crown Court system have just authorised any means necessary to bring to and end the Bristol Abuse Case and punish those who have been involved in it. Of course the Crown hasn't actually put that in writing and I've yet to see any action but it will be interesting to see if it filters down the chain of command because it means the accused can expect no protection under law. On that topic I should point out that Scotland Yard did not dispatch that Diplomatic Protection Squad (DPS) car to Croydon in order to help me. Instead they did it to warn Croydon Police to keep a lid on things. The thinking being that if they can contain the Croydon network they will be able to preserve the status quo and escape punishment. This is simply not the case. The incident is going in my scrapbook of great memories though because when I saw the DPS car it had just pulled up behind a Croydon police car at some traffic lights. The occupants of the Croydon car were doing that thing everyone does when a police car pulls up behind them of looking straight ahead and trying not to look too nervous.

*The only changes between the Law Lords and the Suprme Court are purely cosmetic in that they've got a new name and a new building.

Damn The Croydon Network Are Dumb As Rocks.

All day the BBC have been running a story calling for local people to help find Charles Darwin's missing notebook. This has prompted building contractors who, on behalf of Croydon Council, are renovating several housing association properties in Richmond road to force open my bedroom window looking for the missing notebook. Obviously nothing has been taken because the notebook never existed. However they left the window slightly open so I knew they'd been there. Unfortunately my neighbours also know they've been there and the media know they've been there. Scotland Yard most certainly know they've been there because they dispatched a Diplomatic Protection Squad car to patrol the Borough. That has caused the local police to er, evacuate their bowels because now the big boy cops have got involved it's going to have to be a conspiracy charge that brings down the building contractors, the housing association and the housing department at Croydon Council that employs them.

Man I've Got To Stop Doing This.

I've just got back from my grandmother's appointment with the memory service. This meant that I've spent the last two hours sitting around in a medical centre fiddling with one of those collapsible walking canes.

The police decided to help everyone prepare for the appointment by circling their helicopter over the house for a couple of hours last night. The idea being that sleep deprivation would cause my grandmother to be more confused leading to an over diagnosis. In the end it back fired because she was so over tired that she slept through the entire appointment leaving the memory service to conclude that she was sleep deprived and making the room easier for me to manage. As for the appointment itself they've diagnoses non-specific dementia related disorder which even in the vague world of mental health diagnosis is so vague as to be useless. They also appear to have backed away from research approach for the time being. This probably just an attempt to build up my confidence. However it could could also indicate that they've finally realised that conducting a research project into dementia on a patient whose dementia symptoms are inconsistent a best is not likely to be that fruitful. The next step they're discussing is a short period of respite care for my grandmother alongside an renewed attempt to introduce a cleaner / home help. These things are however still in the future and in play.

The only possible security risk I can think of is that they we're able to observe the interaction between my father and I for the period of about one hour. I don't think that's too major a problem and you'll notice I actually had to fight to give them that bonus. No doubt this will fill the Brits with a miss-placed confidence but a lack of arrogance has never really been their problem.

This Is Why I Prefer to Pre-Draft Things.

I've been looking back over my posts for the past few weeks and realised that there are a few things in those posts that weren't as clear as perhaps they should be. This is because I've pretty much been writing them on the spot. The reason for this change of tactics is that my notebook has been in use drafting that complaint to the police. Covering three months of interaction with the police it's turned into quite a long document but it is now complete. All I need to do is type it up, decide who I'm going to send it too and whether to post it, email it, fax it, deliver it by hand or all four. In the mean time I can clarify some of the things that I've posted that might have caused confusion.

1. Although all the researchers at Bristol University have undergone enhanced background checks I don't think the Belle de Jour scoop was the work of the state. The press, especially the tabloids, have been trying to find out who the woman is for years and recently they've been getting closer and closer. There may have been a little state involvement getting the story published in the Sunday Times on November 15th but it would have been in the Mail on Sunday on November 22nd anyway.

2. While the Manchester anti-terror raids where no doubt carried out in an effort to re-sell the war in Afghanistan I don't think they were ordered by Gordon Brown. Instead I think they were ordered by MI5 in order to embarrass Gordon Brown.

3. I said the reporting of the Cumbria floods had been purposefully focused on Cockermouth. This might have given the impression that it was the media who took the decision to focus on Cockermouth. This isn't the case. In a situation like that they media just go where they think the action is. If the Environment Agency tell them that the worst of the flooding is going to be in Cockermouth and the RAF announce that they're sending three Sea King helicopters to Cockermouth then the media are going to focus on Cockermouth.

4. I said that my father will be bringing a solicitor round to get my grandmother to sign a lasting power of attorney on Tuesday. This is not true the solicitor is coming round on Thursday. It is not my mistake because my father told me it was Tuesday so I repeated Tuesday. Incidentally this evening I told him that I will be attending my grandmother's appointment with the memory service tomorrow. It would be fair to say that this caused him to hit the roof. That's hardly a surprise because he's been looking a little ashen faced since his mates at the Safer Neighbourhood Team told him that the investigation have been taken out of their hands. It's almost as if he's suddenly realised that boasting he's a good friend with the Mayor of Croydon isn't quite the threat he intends it to be.

Over the weekend Tottenham Hotspur beat Wigan Athletic 9-1 which is a massive score for a soccer game. Tottenham traditionally have a very large Jewish fanbase, so much so that their fans call themselves "The Yid Army." Amongst the BNP/BFF/EDL groups that make up Britain's far right there is a high profile activist known as "Wigan Mike." Therefore the result appears to be an attempt by the Brits to reassure the Israeli's that while Britain is building up a group racist, fascist lunatics they won't be anti-semitic racist, fascist lunatics. Doing it through the medium of football also allows the Brits to a give the racist, fascist lunatics a clip round the ear over the anti-semitism.

Aside from that Britain appears to be putting every story it can think of that features news of police officers, the Crown Prosecution Service or people going to prison. This is because they're in a bit of a panic and are trying to create a smoke screen. Apart from my antics they're in a panic because they don't really have a clue what happened at the summit between the USA and China. The situation has flared up in Northern Ireland and it looks like a response to provocation by the Brits. The Iraq war inquiry begins on Monday and it's going to be difficult for it not to leave MI6 looking stupid. Worst of all it looks as though the Cumbria flood has actually caused hundreds of millions pounds of damage having brought down at least four bridges and undermined several more. The extreme weather has also completely contradicted the Brits negotiating position ahead of the Copenhagen Summit.

From what I've seen most of the news output is just white noise and should be ignored. After all I'm not sending this complaint letter to ask for the Brit's help. I've sending it to give them the option to avoid what's going to happen next. Therefore any interaction with them on the matter is probably best done in the form of ultimatum rather then discussion.

The Zulu's Have Attacked.

When I phoned them on Friday I arranged for the Police Community Support Officers (PCSO) form Bensham Manor Safer Neighbourhoods Team (SNT) to come round a 15:00 today. They decided they weren't going to bother with this and turned up a 10:35 this morning. Obviously this made things a little bit difficult as I'd just got out of bed. I didn't miss much though because the visit was more of a courtesy call to tell me that they won't be handling the case.

Personally I think that's a good thing because a criminal investigation into local police and local government corruption is a little bit above the investigative remit of the PCSO's at the local SNT. This is especially true when the allegation is against the PCSO's at the local SNT. Besides a cynic would think that the sudden arrival of the PCSO's was nothing more then an attempt to delay me filing a formal complaint.

I'm Home, Safe, Well and I Want to Tell You a Story.

It's only a short story but it's a story I've been meaning to tell for a long time so please pay attention at the back.

At the time of my rendition back to Croydon there was a big advertising banner hanging over the ticket office at East Croydon station. Paid for by the local council it read simply; "Croydon is undergoing a revolution!" After I'd been living in the town for about a year and complained that the council were trying to revolutionise mental health care provision when it really needed an evolution that sign was replaced. The new sign read; "Croydon is undergoing an Evolution!" That sign hangs there to this day, presumably because no-one at the council knows how to spell entropy. So the answer to the question of what Croydon Council did to deserve the current predicament is quite simple. They volunteered for it. They volunteered thinking that they could steal my work and pass it off as their own for personal gain. To put it another way they tried to play the school yard bully and now they're pissed off because they've just discovered they're not the biggest boy in the playground.

Anyway today I've been off to Brighton to meet an old contact. This contact is very important to me because I need new shoes and Croydon just can't manage a decent shoe shop. Sorry for any confusion but I guess that once again those pesky Brits have been judging me by their own low standards.

Probably Shouldn't Laugh But...

Today my father has been in a spectacularly irritating mood. To give you an idea I was speaking to him earlier and he said, sarcastically; "So you think that if I read a book on a subject I would improve my knowledge of that subject?" so I looked at him blankly for a moment and said; "Yes. I do. That idea is sort of the basis for modern civilisation." so he told me to stop being so silly. Anyway he's been carrying on like that all day to my grandmother so she thumped him with her walking stick.

That Didn't Go Quite To Plan.

Overnight there has been flooding across the county of Cumbria in the north of England. As this co-incided with the election of the President of the European Union and developments in my antics the Brits decided to make as much as they possibly could from the flooding. This involved concentrating the reporting from the comically named town of Cockermouth* and mounting ridiculously overblown rescue operations in order to make it appear as if it was the worst storm in the history of the world. It wasn't. It was about five feet of fresh water flooding an area with first world emergency services who had almost a week to prepare.

At around 05:00 this narrative came off the rails when a bridge over the river Derwent collapsed causing a police officer to be swept away. This shifted the focus away from Cockermouth and on to Workington as a search for the missing officer ensued. A body has now been recovered but not formally identified.

The most worrying part of the story is that the Meteorological Office are declaring the floods to be result of a once in 100 year weather. The problem is they said exactly the same thing when there was wide spread flooding in 2007.


*It's a town at the mouth of the river Cocker, not a reference to oral sex.

Help, I've Been Overrun by the Belgians.

The beer you understand, not the politicians. Herman Van Rumpuy has today been elected as the President of the EU. As the Prime Minister of a fractured Belgium I think he can be accurately described as a consensus builder and his appointment represents the EU entering a period of consolidation. All of this is of course secondary to a boozy dinner I had with my father.

During the course of this meal my father revealed the real reason why he is so desperate to have my grandmother ruled mentally incapable on grounds of dementia. He is currently trying to have a lasting power of attorney taken out on her behalf. This power, granted under the Mental Capacity Act 2005, would give him full control over her bank accounts and any property she owns including her house. Obviously this has been going on for a number of months but as this is the first time he has formally mentioned it to me it is also the first time that I can talk about it. Being the snidey little gobshite of a cunt he is he has organised for the solicitor to come round and have this document signed on the same day that he has arranged for my grandmother be to be assessed by the Croydon Memory Service (24/11). This means that I will be having a slightly stressful day instantly swapping by healthcare professional hat for my lawyer hat however my father is so worried about it that he's having a little bit of a tantrum.

Aside from that I can think of nothing else to say other then to inform you that Metropolitan Police Officers attached to the Croydon Borough are identified by the call sign Zulu Delta. This means that everytime they appear at my front gate I feel obligated to get my Micheal Caine on and sing Land of my Fathers.

The Helicopter of the Day Has Been.....

An Apache Longbow.

Seriously, today I had to go into Croydon town centre to run a few errands. After I'd been there about twenty minutes the evil silhouette of the helicopter gunship appeared in the sky and seemed to follow me around. While this is not the best feeling in the world it certainly puts the Police's noise dampened Eurocopter in perspective.

One of the errands I was running was sending this letter to the Croydon Integrated Psychological Therapies Service (CIPTS). I suddenly realised that the post office was only about five minutes walk from their offices so I delivered it in person and got a receipt. The letter was made up of the original letter of October 12th along with a print out of the email and a covering letter explaining the situation. In the covering letter I included the phrase; " I understand that acknowledging this letter will make it difficult for you to discharge me for non-co-operation" which should be interesting if the need arises for that letter to be read back in court.

I've also called back the PCSO's and while they now seem less keen to be helpful we made an appointment for them to come round on Monday.

The Queens Speech.

Today the Queen of England gave her traditional speech to Parliament at the State Opening of Parliament. Although the speech which lays out the planned agenda for the coming year is delivered by the Queen it is written by the Prime Minister. As such the event can provide a snapshot of the relationship between the Queen and the Prime Minister. For example last years speech had to be hastily re-written after the Queen refused to announce the Prime Minister's plan to set up a national identity database. This years speech was nowhere near as interesting because it's already been made perfectly clear that no relationship exists between the Queen and the Prime Minister and with only five months of Parliamentary time left before the General Election there is very little chance that any of the policies announced will actually become law.

I got up early especially to watch the Queen's speech but got distracted, forgot why I'd got up early and failed to watch any of it. Instead I watched Ugly Betty, which considering the Queen's given name could be the start of a very bad joke. I have managed to catch up on the speeches contents and I think the only parts of it that stand a chance of becoming law are the Digital Economy Bill that will tackle online piracy, the Financial Services Bill that will straighten the FSA to take action on bankers bonuses and the Fiscal Responsibility Bill which will compel the Government to reduce Britain's national debt. All three of these enjoy broad cross party support and the Fiscal Responsibility Bill covers issues that are above even the Queen's pay-grade. The Financial Services Bill might still get bogged down depending on how the public mood towards bankers changes over time. I wish I'd seen the speech, especially the part where plans were announced to get tough on anti-social behaviour. I bet that stuck in the Queen's throat because it was when it was included in the speech it was intended to be a metaphorical dig at me. However by the time the speech was delivered events had changed and it now sounds like the Queen is going to be forced to publicly throw her Loyalists to the wolves.

On that front this afternoon I got an unexpected visit from two Police Community Support Officers (PCSO). As I was in the bath at the time I didn't actually speak to them but they left a note asking me to call them back. As I haven't actually spoken to them I don't really know what's going on. However the fact that they're sending PCSO's rather then police officers does indicate that they are still intending to go down the Anti-Social Behaviour Order (ASBO) route rather then prosecution for specific criminal offences namely, burglary, attempted burglary, criminal damage and intimidation of a witness route. In a world where judges have integrity, so not Croydon then, this would actually prevent them from obtaining an ASBO because they are only supposed to be used when it is impossible to prosecute a criminal offence. By a stroke of luck I went out to get some cigarettes at around 18:30. The route took me past the house in question and parked outside was an empty police car, the occupants were presumably in the house. Although I have no idea what was going I suspect that the police were inside advising the suspects how to avoid prosecution. It does rather show the double standard at work though. To help mount the prosecution I get the help of two PSCO's. In order to avoid the prosecution the suspects get the assistance of two police officers.

What with having to chase up these PCSO's and re-send this letter to the mental health people it looks like I'm going to have a busy day tomorrow. I should then take this opportunity to make this clear and definitive statement;

I will not be undergoing Cognative Behavioural Therapy with Croydon PCT nor will I ever be calling Croydon home. Anyone who thinks otherwise is clearly a dangerous fantasist who should be detained under the mental health act for their own safety.

Never In the Course of Human Endevour

has a man drunk for a further six hours and become more sober. I have however caught a few moments of the NATO summit and concluded that yes Gordon Brown does just announce this shit in advance. I have also been pondering this situation with the Croydon Integrated Therapies Service (CIPTS) and decided that if I were to kidnap the head of CIPTS and hold him in a basement before kidnapping a tattoo artist and then force him to tattoo then contents of my October letter on to the head of CIPTS face the police would probably call that excessive.

Beyond that I've just seen the latest Lady Gaga video. The more I she of her the more I become convinced that she's part of America's plans to close Guantanamo Bay. The theory follows that if you, the rest of the world, chose to accept Guantanamo Bay inmates then America will promise that she never visits your country ever again.

Yeah it's been a long day.

Quick Think of a Title.

Today has been my father's birthday. To celebrate he, my grandmother and I have been having lunch at a rapidly emptying restaurant in South Croydon right by the Mind in Croydon offices. As a consequence I am now rather drunk. You may have been alerted to this, the birthday not the drunkenness, by the barrage of hostile news stories. These have included the latest drivel on the NHS treatment of dementia patients and the Australian story about two twin girls who were joined at the head but have been successfully separated by surgeons.

As far as I'm concerned the most important event of the day was that I received another letter from Croydon Integrated Psychological Therapies Service (CIPTS). This letter claimed that CIPTS had not received a response to their letter of October 7th and offered me another appointment for Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) on November 27th. The purpose of doing this is that CIPTS hope to discharge me on the grounds of non-compliance with offered treatment. Acknowledging that I have been in contact with them makes this more difficult. The problem for them is that I sent the original letter by recorded delivery so someone claiming to be from CIPTS has already acknowledged its receipt on October 17th. As soon as I received today's letter I fired off a quick email making CIPTS aware of this detail and advised them not to send me any further letters as they will be disregarded. I feel I should receive an award for showing great constraint by not allowing that sentence to read "they will be disregarded as the work of a complete idiot." Obviously this won't be enough for CIPTS so I will be resending the original reply.

Elsewhere the British Government has continued in it's attempts to re-sell the Afghan war to the British public. Alongside the staged anti-terrorist arrests yesterday this has involved Gordon Brown claiming that the war could end by 2010. This is remarkably similar to the claims at the start of the first world war when it was said that it would all be over by Christmas 1914. Brown has also announced plans to have a special NATO Summit on the war in London in January. This forces me to ask the question of whether he discusses these things with the NATO allies before he announces them or does he just announce them in the hope of embarrassing the NATO allies into attending?

How Did I Forget These?

Over the weekend the anonymous blogger known as Belle de Jour whose blog and novel "Diary of a London Call Girl" inspired the ITV series "Secret Diary of a Call Girl" finally reveled her identity. She is Dr Brooke Magnanti, a PHD in epidemiology working out of Bristol University. No doubt this has caused quite a stir a Bristol University and has led to lots of discussion linking researchers at the university to prostitution. Obviously it would be a bad idea for me to contribute to this scandal, which must be very stressful for female PHD students at Bristol, no matter how vindicated I feel. After all I've been saying for years that researchers at Bristol University are only good for one thing and it ain't science.

There were also five anti-terrorism arrests in Manchester, UK this morning. This is hardly surprising because the large number of coffins returning from Afghanistan means that support for the war has dropped to less then 30% according to some pollsters. Also this evening Gordon Brown gave a very, very important speech to the City of London Guilds. The main thrust of the speech was Britain's continuing war in Afghanistan and the Prime Minister once again trotted out the old mantra that Britain must keep fighting in Afghanistan to stop Al Queda launching terrorist plots in Britain. Of course the fact that after eight years of war Al Queda are still, according to the police, more then capable of mounting terrorist plots in Britain does rather contradict this argument but hey, it is Gordon Brown after all.

There Is Nothing to Report.

Today I've been to see my doctor for a routine appointment. Absolutely nothing out of the ordinary happened and it was pretty much exactly the same as the last time I saw him and the time before that. This means that if there is something going on it's happening so quietly and so discreetly that I'm unable to pick up on it. It's much more likely though that after six years the Brits are finally beginning to grasp the balance of power in the relationship and are trying hard to avoid rocking the boat.

Today the news is full of the arrest of the "Nightstalker" rapist who carried out over 200 rapes and sexual assaults. As the attacks occurred in and around the Croydon area and the suspect was arrested in Brockley which is near enough Croydon people might be tempted to read to much into the story. That isn't the case, the police are simply making a lot of noise about it because they're proud of finally closing the case. Of course their pride isn't tempered at all by the fact it's taken them 19 years, 12 of which featured a specialist task force working nothing but this case.

Likewise there is also a lot of noise coming out of both Britain and Australia over the Child Migrants Program of the 1950's and 1960's. This can't possibly be related to me because I've already made it perfectly clear what a British apology to me will entail and I've not seen any evidence that one is forthcoming.

The Storm Clouds Have Cleared.

The sun has shone. The beer and whisky has flowed. That's right, today, yesterday and a little bit of tomorrow has been my birthday.

I'd like to pretend that I've celebrated wildly but sadly I haven't. The highlight of events was that while taking a train home, alone, on a Saturday night a stunning goth girl got on with her boyfriend so I had a bit of a lech. Sadly they spotted me which was a little bit embarrassing. I changed trains and there they were sitting opposite me again which was quite embarrassing. I changed trains for a third time and once again there they were sitting a few seats down quietly judging me which by then had got very embarrassing. To make matters worse when I got off the train at my final destination they got off with me meaning that they live really close by. Personally I'm just waiting for the warning posters to start appearing on lampposts all around my neighbourhood.

Anyway I'm now looking forward to next weekend when the party should begin in earnest and that's a dangerous thing to say when you're talking about heading down to Brighton.

Disaster Averted

Earlier today my grandmother told my father he's being a pain in the arse. My father decided this was the urgent symptom of some mental health crisis and immediately contacted the Croydon Memory Service presumably to have her detained under the mental health act. I went over to speak to her and found her lucid with no evidence of cognitive distress.

When I pointed this out to my father he accused me of not recognising dementia when I saw it. So I simply asked him if he knew what the diagnostic criteria of dementia was. He didn't which prompted a little bit of a tantrum that seems to be over now. He's currently sitting down having a little bit of a think. In an ideal world this would indicate that the message is now slowly getting across but sadly logical thought and rational argument have never been a strong point for him.

Elsewhere I've received the standard "Sorry you've been a victim of crime" letter over the police report I made last Friday. That means the letter of complaint is about to be drafted. I'm currently debating whether I should cc it to the borough commander or whether I should just got straight to the Commissioner of the Metropolitan police. After all he's been making a lot of noise in the media recently about how he's sick of crimes being under reported and how it allows criminals to get off lightly.

For A Thursday If This Is All There Is

Then I'm sorely disappointed.

Today the Minister for Care Services, Phil Hope, has announced plans to cut the prescription of anti-psychotic drugs to patients with dementia. On the face of it this sounds like a good thing with the government striving hard to improve the care of dementia patients. You may even have the false impression that my grandmother has dementia and is being over prescribed anti-psychotics. That would make it appear that the Labour minister is taking a brave stand to protect my grandmother from the Croydon Network.

Unfortunately none of this is true. The first thing you have to understand is that anti-psychotics, like all other drugs, are expensive. Therefore limiting a doctors right to prescribe them will save the NHS rather a lot of money. Secondly my grandmother doesn't haven't dementia and despite a good clinical case for doing so isn't being prescribed anti-psychotics. The drugs she was being over prescribed in order to falsify a dementia diagnosis were a painkiller and a treatment for stomach ulcers althoguh we've stopped that nonsense now. Therefore if the minister was seriously trying to protect my grandmother he would simply issue a statement calling for the law of the land to be allowed to run its course.

Aside from the desperate need to save money the real motivation for the government to call for a cut in the use of anti-pyschotics is that I, for reasons I won't go into, use anti-psychotics. As with psychosis and dementia the effects of anti-psychotics are not well understood however the Brits believe that their use is what is allowing me to resist the Brits program of psychological harassment. Therefore they intend to attempt to restrict my use of these drugs in order to make me more compliant. In the process they also hope that I will give them information on mental health issues because, at present, they don't even have usable data on what drugs I'm taking.

In short they want me to provide them with a service but they don't want to pay for that service.

Now That Was Confusing

Normally on a Wednesday I wake up, have breakfast and wait to watch Prime Minister Question Time. Due to having a bit of a hectic day yesterday I overslept and expected to have missed PMQ's. I was a bit confused then to find myself watching it at 15:00. This was because it had been delayed to allow for services commemorating Armistice Day. This is the day when Britain stops to remember the horrific slaughter of the first world war and the British dead from all the wars since inclduing Afghanistan. Therefore the mood of the nation today has been depressed, irritable and erratic. A very small part of the reason for this was a series of announcements made yesterday and today.

Delay in Judaical Review. The verdict in the judicial review into the sacking of Sharon Shoesmith over the Baby P case has been delayed. This is because Ofsted suddenly uncovered a report into Ms Shoesmith's conduct which her legal team feel is crucial to the case. Therefore they've been granted more time to examine the report and Ofsted have been accused of withholding evidence. The case is clearly now being used as a metaphor for the issues I'm currently having with Croydon Council although I can't see the connection. Consequently the only reason for drawing the comparison seems to be to cause confusion. As I've previously mentioned the success or otherwise of Ms Shoesmith's case will have no impact on whether or not those responsible for the death of Baby P will be punished.

Baby RB Right To Die. This is the case of a 13 month old infant, known as Baby RB, with a rare genetic condition that leaves him unable to breathe unaided. His mother and medical team have been fighting for the right to withdraw medical treatment. His father had taken the case to the high court in order to stop them. Yesterday the father dropped his opposition allowing doctors to remove life support. In this story I am Baby RB, the mother is my biological mother and the father is my biological father. Therefore the announcement is that the Brits intend to remove life support from me. This could be a good thing because it indicates that the Brits are finally accepting that between me and them I'm not the one that needs psychiatric help. Sadly though I think it's more likely that they intend to attempt to remove my income from the benefits agency. I've not seen or heard anything that would corroborate this so it's hard to tell if it's a credible threat. After all it is difficult to tell if the Brits are lying because even when they're trying to be honest that truth rarely has any grounding in reality. Even if it is true I doubt the move will have any immediate effect on me. This is because even if no-one steps in to take advantage of the fact those benefit payments have actually acted as a salary cap I will be able to sustain at this level until 2012, possibly 2013. It does however cause me an interesting moral dilemma because if the Brits do follow through with that threat it puts pressure on me to respond in kind. As Britain is not as isolated from the international community as perhaps it needs to be such a response will have global consequences.

Canoeman Payback. Today it was announce that the wife of canoeman fraudster, John Darwin, would repay part of the proceeds of the fraud. As Mrs Darwin looks a bit like my mother's lesbian partner the message of the story is that the Brits intend to seize her assets and break up her relationship with my mother. Personally I don't think this is a realistic threat and even if it was it's unlikely to have much effect on me. Instead I think it's an attempt to increase tensions ahead of the birthday dinner I will be having with the pair on Saturday. Although it wasn't an intention of the story I do find the whole thing rather annoying because if it wasn't for the "assistance" of certain people I would have had this situation locked down by now putting the Brits in a very different negotiating position.

Taken together the purpose of these announcements is primarily to give faith to the Loyalists in order to prevent them from asking for actual evidence of success. They're also designed to intimidate me into dropping my rather successful attempts to have the Croydon Network punished. That's something that won't be happening and I'm confused as to why the Brits would want it to. After all in the next three to four years they're going to be punishing the Croydon Network anyway. Not because they're going to have some moral epiphany but because I've removed their tactical option not to. Therefore they might as well do it my way and salvage something from the disaster that is their existence. I would have have commented on this announcements sooner but they were also timed to be released on a Tuesday. On this day I'm normally a bit busy because I have to go shopping and endure a tedious pub dinner with my father. During the course of these chores I also have to make sure that my claims that the Croydon Network won't be successful become a reality. Although it meant I missed the news of the Fort Hood memorial service and Cameron's speech on poverty this actually went quite well.

The Brits Have Got A Sulk On.

It's something of a national sulk so it's hard to know where to start. I should probably start with how my day started. Two minutes after I activated my cellphone I got a call from the police to follow up on the report I made on Friday. As I was doing what most people do when they've just got out of bed I was unable to take the call. The police though did leave a garbled message the gist of which was that they'll send me a letter in a few weeks and have no real intention of investigating the report. The caller failed to leave their name, their police ID or a contact telephone number which made it hard for me to call them back. I tried to get in contact through the Metropolitan Police's main switchboard and was assured they would call straight back. They didn't so I called back at around 16:00 and had more success not only getting through to the Crime Management Unit and the Telephone Investigation Unit but picking up their non-public telephone numbers on the way. After an interesting conversation in which is was suggested that the Croydon Safer Neighbourhoods Team might wish to consider alternative employment a fuller report was made emphasising that physical evidence does exist and will be degraded by the police delaying an investigation.

During the course of these phone calls the police actually swore at me a couple of times which was a clue that they're not in the best of moods. Partly this is because I was calling them on my cellphone* and they know that these calls are being recorded so can be used as evidence against them in a court of law should the need arise. Mainly though it's because they realise that, unlike my father, I don't consider members of the Croydon Network to be either friends or colleagues so I won't be letting the matter rest.

It seems the spooks are as upset as the police because they've forced the Sun newspaper to run a story about how Gordon Brown upset the grieving mother of a British solider by sending her a scribbled letter of condolence packed with spelling mistakes. On one level this is a simple attack on Gordon Brown. This seems pretty fair because the letter is indisputably written by Gordon Brown so he is responsible for its contents. Personally I think the Sun or anyone else who thinks the UK deserves a sporting chance would have run the story without the need for the gun to the head. The story gets a bit more complicated when you realise that the mother in question looks a bit like the Linda woman we've been having issues with although she looks nothing like the middle aged bald man the police have been trying so hard not to find. This means that the story is also an attempt to heap pressure on Linda in the hope that this will further the Chav research project. Perversely the story is also an attempt to garner support for Linda by portraying her as a poor victim who was pressurised into her crime by the evil Labour government. Having met them and other members of the Croydon Voluntary Action Network I know as fact that this isn't true because they're nothing more then common criminals motivated by simple greed. Even if it was true it's still irrelevant because as anyone knows being pressured into a crime does not give the offender any defence for the crime they've committed. It merely provides mitigation for the type of sentence that is passed as punishment for the crime. I, of course, will consider any mitigation offered by the Brits but they have to understand the maximum sentence that I'm entitled to have imposed.

Today has also seen the funeral of Helen Smith. Ms Smith was a British nurse who died in suspicious circumstances in Saudi Arabia in 1979. Possibly because diplomatic relations with the Middle East are tense at best the Brits allowed the death to be ruled an accident. Since then Ms Smith's father has maintained that it was murder and insisted on having his daughter body kept in the mortuary in case it is needed as evidence. He actually gave permission to have a funeral a few weeks ago and that funeral took place today although has widely been mis-reported as a burial. I'm taking this as an attempt by the Brits to float the idea that Amy's father has given permission to have Amy buried away from her soft well paid job in a much less well paid and more stressful alternative. Obviously I cannot verify if he has given that permission, and I have my doubts, but if he has then once again Amy's father has been mis-informed over the cause of his daughters death.


*Well I've got to use those free calls for something.

How's This For A Bit Of Conspiraloonary.

For a number of years there's been a conspiracy theory doing the rounds that the UK National Lottery is rigged. Supposedly this is why the sale of tickets stops so long before every draw and why Camelot is the only company that ever gets awarded the contract to run the lucrative game.

The theory follows that in the, up to, three hours between the last ticket being sold and the draw being made the numbers on the tickets that have been brought is analysed and the "winner" is chosen. In the case of online plays and people who play the same numbers week in and week out this analysis can not only identify the shop the "winning" ticket was brought from but the individual that purchased it. Once the "winning" combination of numbers has been identified the lottery balls that carry those numbers are coated in a thin magnetic film. During the draw this means that those balls are attracted to an electromagnet in the draw machine and the seven winning numbers are seen to be "randomly" selected live on TV.

The reasons why the National Lottery is supposed to be fixed are multiple but include; It provides a sly way to pay out large sums of money to people who have been deemed deserving of such a reward. It can be used as a way to create excitement and feelings of success in a local area by promising to inject large amounts of money into the local economy. It can create the sort of human interest, good news, stories that encourage people to continue playing the lottery and by extension pour money into the 2012 Olympics in what is essentially a tax on human stupidity.

Although the person who originally told me this story is the sort of person who would know about this sort of thing they're also the sort of person who would lie so I've always been a bit skeptical about the whole thing. That skepticism took a huge knock on Friday when two British ticket holders shared a £90million jackpot in the Euromillions draw, a pan-European Lottery administered in part by Camelot. This was one hell of a coincidence because earlier in the week the Czech Republic ratified the Lisbon Treaty. This prompted the British Prime Minister, David Cameron, to announce that Britain would drop any opposition to the Lisbon Treaty and go back on his promise to hold a referendum on the matter. Therefore it looks as if the Lottery win was a reward to Britain for being good little Europeans and encourage the British people to look more favourably on pan-European enterprises.

Of Course I'm not just saying that because I didn't buy one of the winning tickets!

Harasment Update.

As has been previously discussed the Croydon network have recently been engaged in low level harassment against me. While the nature of this harassment has been more laughable then frighting I am in the process of reporting the matter to the police. I have yet to give the full details of the matter to the police so you'll excuse me if I don't expand on the details here.

The main reason for making report is that paranoia and feelings of persecution are a symptom of dementia. Therefore it would be difficult for Croydon Memory Service to argue that my grandmother is suffering from that symptom if the police agree that there are people out to get her.

While I only reported the matter to create a paper trail the police, after an early tantrum and some obvious conversations with their superiors, now seem very keen to investigate the complaint. This is because they hope to be able to investigate the matter as a case of Anti-Social Behaviour. This is currently a hot political issue in the UK. In order to deal with it the state has a vast range of highly intrusive powers such as Anti-Social Behaviour Orders, Acceptable Behaviour contracts and Councils can use the Regulatory Investigative Powers Act (RIPA) to spy on people accused of it. This investigative route will allow them to gather huge amounts of intelligence on the suspects who fit into the mysterious "Chav" demographic.

Obviously as the harassment follows from an attempted burglary I will be pressing for it to be investigated as the much more serious crime of attempting to intimidate a witness in a criminal investigation. However this matter is starting to get tedious so I may still be tempted to go down the RIPA route. If that happens all the suspect needs to do is claim that he was put up to offence by Croydon Council. Then it becomes a criminal investigation into the conduct of Croydon Council and the Croydon Borough of the Metropolitan Police.

With the football and the boxing I suspect the suspect is facing quite a tense weekend so we shall see how that plays out. I should make clear though that I will not be satisfied until the full network has been prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

A Date For Your Diary.

The Croydon Memory Service will be returning to visit my grandmother on November 24th. That's three weeks in the future so until then there's not really much to add. For a Thursday it's been exceptionally quiet but the cleaner has been round. From this I got the general impression that the Croydon network are starting to understand that their chances of success are now starting to look even slimmer then before. As a result they will probably be trying very, very hard over the next couple of weeks so if any of you hear anything about their efforts feel free to send me an email.

Simon Mann's Been Released.

Today Simon Mann, a former officer with the British Special Air Service (SAS) was pardoned and released from prison in Equatorial Guinea on condition that he immediately leaves the West African country and never returns. Acting as a mercenary Mr Mann was convicted of attempting to lead a Coup to overthrow the government of the oil rich nation. Although the backers of the coup have never been officially revealed they are believed to be a cabal of high level members of the British Establishment including members of the House of Lords, Directors of British Petroleum (BP) and Mark Thatcher, son of former British Prime Minister, Margret Thatcher. The objective of the coup was to install a new government in Equatorial Guinea who would sell oil concessions to the coup backers on favourable terms.

As my given name is Simon and, last time I checked, I am a man this story could be interpreted as a reference to me. As I've not received any information that would indicate that I am to be released I think it is highly unlikely that this is the case. Instead I think the Brits are just putting this slant on the story in order to cover up the fact that they've just sprung one of their own from jail and discourage people from looking for the other coup conspirators. However there may be an element of the Brits attempting to get an idea of who may assist me in the future should that need arise.

As for the deal that brought about the release. I think it's just the government of Equatorial Guinea honouring a deal they did with Mr Mann back in 2008 which gave them a large show trial coupled with the fact that many African leaders are getting sick and tired of talking about the matter

The Nut's Lost It On Drugs.

Well someone's been chucking the toys out of the pram at least.

One of the big stories in the UK over recent days has been the sacking of Professor David Nutt, head of the Government's Advisory Council on the Misuse of Drugs. The sacking comes in response to a spat that arose after Professor Nutt declared that using cannabis was less dangerous then using alcohol or tobacco. Although this statement is supported by a wealth of scientific evidence it runs contrary to the Governments position that the use to cannabis must be prohibited because it is "lethal"* The story is something of a behemoth of a news event that encompasses a vast range of issues.

1. The Drugs Debate. Like abortion, sex and gun control the debate over the use of recreational drugs is a recurring one within western societies, Britain included. The current dominant scientific position is to move towards legalisation and education while the dominant political position is to call for greater prohibition. This current dispute opens the debate up to a whole group of new voters and encourages the expression of a range of new opinions on the matter. Personally I've taken pretty much every illegal drug there is and have been more involved then most in their supply and sale. Therefore it is an area in which I feel particularly knowledgeable making it a very difficult issue for me to comment on without contributing to the debate.

2. Spreading Confusion. Aside from the controversial nature of the subject the names of the people involved are particularly off putting. On top of the hard to resist headline used above Professor Nutt's sacking has prompted the resignation of one of his colleagues, Dr Lesley King. This man's name is easily confused with that of England footballer, Ledley King and in it's short form, Les King, makes him sound as if he's the King of the Lesbians. A controversial position if there ever was one.

3. The Power of Suggestion. As previously mentioned in my life I have smoked a lot of cannabis. So much so that the plans the Brits have for me are entirely dependent on the fact I am experiencing the effects of cannabis as they understand them. Obviously this means that along with experiencing love, friendship or any feelings of warmth or happiness smoking cannabis is something that I simply can no longer do. The reporting of the story, especially by the BBC, has featured lots of footage of cannabis along with footage of people preparing and smoking cannabis joints. This is the sort of thing that you would expect to tempt a cannabis consumer to consume more cannabis.
Obviously I am not the only person in the country to watch the news and I'm not the only person who's ever smoked cannabis. Therefore this promotion of cannabis has to be targeted at a wider section of society then just me. This is supported by the fact that inspite of an alleged police crackdown there is no sign of the seasonal contraction in cannabis supply. Aside from the obvious negative impact that excessive cannabis consumption will have on the UK protest scene, especially the young and rather green Climate Camp movement increased cannabis consumption at this time will have two positive effects for the British State. Firstly the UK housing market has been suffering from a lack of available credit which is depressing property prices. Organised drug dealers represent that rarest of things in the housing market - cash buyers. Boosting their purchasing power will help artificially inflate house prices convincing home owners that they're richer then they really are. Secondly Britain is experiencing rising unemployment especially amongst the young, the low skilled and those who work in the construction industry. If these people can be encouraged to smoke more cannabis they open themselves up to a host of mental health problems that would allow them to be reclassified as unfit for work rather then unemployed. This would reduce the unemployment figures and help to create a false impression about the strength of the UK economy.

4. The Home Secretary. Alan Johnson is the Home Secretary at the centre of this mess. Mr Johnson is widely considered to be the man who will replace Gordon Brown as the leader of the Labour Party and was only put in charge of the Home Office after a terrible misfortune befell the two previous holders of the position. Mr Johnson also used to be a postman before entering politics and is well connected to the Union at the Royal Mail who are currently engaged in strike action. This makes him a prime target for attack by those within in the British Establishment who take it upon themselves to interfere in industrial disputes.
Further more following my August Burglary incident Croydon Council contacted the Home Office to discuss solutions to Croydon Burglary problem. After some discussion the Home Office responded by making £100,000 of central government funding available to solve the problem. Being as greedy as they are stupid Croydon Council decided to pocket the money for themselves using it to fund, amongst other things, the job of "Burglary Coordinator" paying a salary of £26,000 a year. A few weeks after the council made this announcement a court ruling changed the rules on how asylum seekers are funded while their asylum claims are processed. As Lunar House in Croydon was until very recently the UK's only in country reporting centre for asylum seekers that rule change is going to hit Croydon Council very hard to the tune of millions of pounds per year.
Personally I don't think the two incidents were connected for a range of reasons including the timescales involved, the contentious nature of the issue and the fact the decision was made by a judge rather then the Home Office. However Croydon Council, perhaps showing signs of stress, convinced themselves that they were so went bitching and moaning to their MI5 contacts that they were being bullied by the big bad Home Secretary.


*Cannabis is one of the few substances on earth that has no toxic dose. That means that while it might have many effects on you killing you is not one of them.