Tuesday, 10 June 2008

Ladies and Gentlemen London's Crime Problem Has Been Solved.

That's the only conclusion I can reach because at about21:25 (GMT+1) the police helicopter began circling my house.

At about 21:35 I went out to establish that in fact it was the police helicopter and it was definatley circling my house.

At about 21:41 the police helicopter started shining it's spotlight through my front window.

At about 21:56 I phoned 999, the emergency number and politely requested the police fuck off.

At about 21:57 the police fucked off.

At about 21:58 I rolled a cigarrette.

At about 21:59 I went outside to smoke said fag at which point a police riot van drove past so I dilligently waved goodbye to them.

Needless to say earlier today the police had their demand for a pay rise firmly turned down.

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