Saturday 9 February 2013

The Grammy's Dresscode Letter.

At some point in the last week someone leaked a letter sent from the broadcaster CBS to performers at Sunday's (10/2/13) Grammy awards warning them about their outfits. It specifically warned against "thong type costumes" as they may "expose the fleshy parts around a woman's genitals and buttocks."

As most of the Grammy performers are people like Elton John, Sting, Mumford & Sons, Justin Timberlake and Bruno Mars many people have speculated that the letter was directed entirely at Rihanna. Those people are correct. In fact the wording of the letter almost entirely matches the wording of many letters sent between the UK broadcast regulator OFCOM and all those TV porn channels that give me hours of entertainment for probably all the wrong reasons. Seriously you should watch them during the day time when they're fully clothed. It's like a fly on the wall documentary about a really dodgy call centre. I think OFCOM win the letter war though with frequent use of terms like "Vaginal and anal detailing."

Along with the selfie pics for Complex magazine the the CBS letter is meant to make Rihanna think about my relationship with pornography. Or more specifically it's meant to make you think that Rihanna is thinking my relationship with porn. That's because the Yanks are desperately trying to breathe new life into the "duelling horses" narrative from the Diamonds video. Sadly they seem to have missed the bit of the story in which one of the horses was fed into a mincing machine, turned into burgers and served up for lunch.

20:10 on 9/2/13.

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