Monday 6 May 2013

Operation Misery: Month 2, Week 5, Day 1.

On Sunday (5/5/13) Rihanna performed at the Barclay's Centre in Brooklyn, New York City, US. If it wasn't for the re-scheduled Boston concert today and the rescheduled Brooklyn concert on Tuesday (7/5/13) this should have been the climax of the US leg of the Diamonds World Tour. As a result the venue was packed with some of the great and the good of the celebrity world. It is a very long list including Rosie O'Donnell, various Victoria Secret models and the actor Micheal J Fox. However the two I'm most worried about were Cara Delevinge and to a lesser extent Georgia May Jagger who are both British models.

As I've explained before Cara Delevinge is essentially a British spy who was dispatched to the concert to get all the behind the scenes gossip about how Rihanna is doing order for Britain to use that information to put pressure on Rihanna as her tour progresses through Europe and Australasia. In order to make Ms Delevinge's job easier Britain made an effort to cause Rihanna extra stress by putting pressure on me as a proxy. The main part of this was my brother and his girlfriend coming up for dinner at the local pub with me and my father. The idea being that while we were out lots of wild rumours about my safety and security would circulate including things like the speedboat crash in Cornwall, the death of Hibernian fan at their football match against Kilmarnock and the re-capture of Stevie McMullen an escaped prisoner who had been on the run in Manchester. Fortunately I managed to soften all these blows by simply staying home and enjoying good food, good weed, good wine and a bit of peace and quiet. A tough sacrifice I'm sure you'll agree.

One thing I didn't manage to avoid was the TV premiere of  2010 British gangster film called "London Boulevard." This centred around a gangster played by Colin Farrell who was trying to escape his life of crime after being released from prison. He ends up getting a job as bodyguard for a world famous actress played by Keira Knightley who'd been driven slightly insane by the pressures of fame such as constant intrusion by the paparazzi and stalkerish fans. Throughout the film a crime boss played by Ray Winstone is constantly trying to drag Farrell's character back into a life of crime. Winstone's character allows the film to explore the relationship between organised crime, the British Establishment and world famous celebrities. A promising but gay young footballer also puts in an appearance.

The cast list is a whose who of British (and Irish) acting talent. This along with some other distinct similarities with my past means that the film isn't just a premonition of the way Rihanna and I have been forced together but the production may well have been one of the planning meetings. This isn't a great thing for Rihanna to dwell on before a concert - especially one attended by Cara Delevinge - after all a significant proportion of those nudging her in my direction were doing so for very different reasons to her CIA handlers. It should though help reassure her that in lieu of getting this phone thing sorted out no-one will be shocked if she follows me on Twitter so we can at least have the semi-privacy of direct messages.

As for how all this affected Rihanna's concert performance I simply do not know because no local reviews of footage is a available. However in the absence of even rumours of major disasters along with the fact Rihanna went out partying at the Pink Elephant nightclub after the show and seems in fine form today I think it's fair to say she did just fine. This reaction is completely incompatible with news today that Chris Brown considers his relationship with Rihanna to now be over. Rihanna doesn't seem bothered by this because it is of course nonsense. We heard the same stories during the 777 Tour and in the weeks proceeding Rihanna's California concerts and Rihanna and Chris Brown's relationship continued. This latest effort though is the CIA handlers attempting to reduce pressure on Brown to be jailed by trying to assure us that he won't be having any contact with Rihanna during her tour break. We will wait and see what happens.

Much more interesting than Rihanna's concerts though were Justin Beiber's concerts in Dubai, United Arab Emirates (UAE) on Saturday (4/5/13) and Sunday (5/5/13). At the Saturday concert Beiber was some two hours late taking to the stage much to the audiences annoyance. This was a US enquiry as to whether the UAE was as desperately awaiting my response to Friday's (3/5/13) air-strike against Syria as the US was. At the Sunday concert a man leapt onto the stage and lunged at Beiber knocking his piano over in the process. Beiber managed to escape from the man's clutches and the man was swiftly dragged off stage by Beiber's bodyguards. Due to the time difference with the UK this all took place at around the time I should have been out at the pub. Therefore it was a UAE attempt to add to the level of drama the UK was trying to create. As the Sunday incident highlights the very close relationship between the UK and the UAE and because it was a physical assault it demonstrates why I am really not happy about Rihanna's UAE (19/10/13) concert. Therefore I cannot consider the CIA's Rihanna operation terminated until Chris Brown is properly squared away, the communication short-falls have been corrected and the post-Helsinki (28/7/13) concerts are cancelled.

Finally Rihanna's concert in Boston will go ahead today. However while throwing her under the bus Live Nation are attempting to save their own reputation by putting on a benefit concert for those injured in the Boston marathon bombings with tickets going on sale today. Live Nation have miserly announced that only the net profits from the ticket sales will go to the victims once Live Nation has deducted it's fees. As you can probably tell from Rihanna's civil suit against Berdon LLP once Live Nation deducts it's fees there tends not to be very much net profit left. Therefore I think Live Nation should hand over the gross profits from the benefit concert. After all with the artists agreeing to perform and the venue being prepared to stage the concert I'm confused as to what Live Nation's role in the concert actually is.

16:45 on 6/5/13.

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