And that was the G8 summit.

Sandwiched as it was between the Zimbabwe election and the Olympic games it was never go to be as high profile as previous years. The 2008 summit was also hampered by the arrival of three new boys and the departure of one old hand. One of the new boys, Gordon Brown decided to use his arrival on the world stage as an opportunity to make a tit of himself by suggesting the world food crisis could be solved by getting Britons to eat their leftovers and stop wasting so much food.

This announcement so idiotic I can only consider it to be a blatant provocation and chose to ignore it. It was either that or take it as a suggestion I should kill Sadie and keep her in my freezer. After all that's got to the only way she will be able to make a useful contribution to society.

Now with the leaders wives section of the summit over and me being accused of keeping secrets I think it's a good time to tell you what I've been up to over the last couple of days.

Saturday; This was mainly cancelled due to my late entry into the world sleeping championship. Seriously I woke up at around 1pm, got out of the shower about two and just had quick sit down. Suddenly it was five in the evening and time to watch the Doctor Who finale. As I'd just woken up I don't really have a clue as to what happened but apparently it was very good.

Sunday; Watched an excellent British Grand Prix before adding the third coat of paint to the now infamous bathroom ceiling. I think that job is pretty much done by now and I'm just having the internal debate as to whether it would annoy me more to add a fourth coat of paint or to have to go to bed every night knowing it's ;ess then perfect. In the evening I went to the pub where as you may have heard there was a little bit of live entertainment. I should make it clear that rather then being the start of world war three it was just a minor scuffle that was quickly broken up by the bar staff. You would have noticed it happening though.

Monday; Went to see my mother briefly and it's the same old British story. Although life is about choosing from a series of options we will always have to settle for the failure option because our leaders are too scared to choose the success option. Also I got a letter from the DWP informing me that they will be unable to pay me benefits from the June 5th. This is interesting because I haven't claimed from the 5th of June and I hope it's the first in a series of letters telling me I won't be able to claim benefits from every other date I haven't claimed form since the dawn of time.

Tuesday; Didn't do much apart from going shopping. This was no more or less painful then usual. I did however remember to pick up an extra £8 worth of food just so I could throw it away unused.

Wednesday. Got a letter from Mind in Croydon and the message is the same that no matter how well I play the game the rules will always change to make sure I do not win because for some reason we benefit as a society by paying people for jobs they cannot do. Although I've yet to fully digest the correspondence it does seem to leave me with three options and the chance for another numerical list;

1. Mount a legal challenge against the organisation
2. Mount a legal challenge against named individuals within that organisation
3. Do nothing. Legal actions are time consuming and complicated and you have to admit it is quite funny that the council is going to have to pay out upwards of £60,000 a year for a service which does not work. Obviously that's less funny if you're a taxpayer or someone who needs are service that can produce results but hey, I'm a member of the ruling class now so I don't have to worry about mere details like that.

I'm think the option I decide to take will depend on how easy it is for me to find a solicitor. I also have to consider that by defending Sadie the state do honestly believe that they are helping to hide the truth that they always turn their guns on their own.

Today I also went to see my psychiatrist. The appointment was meant to be at 11am but they didn't manage to see me until 1pm. I presume this was done in the hope that I would get bored and leave so they could discharge me for failing to attend. Apparently this is still considered a valid reason for discharging mental patients but I suppose when the system is as badly overstretched as ours it doesn't matter how you get patients off the waiting list just as long as you get them of the waiting list.

While I wouldn't normally discuss the details of my appointments with doctors the re-emergence of the Dwain Chambers drug cheat story I do need to mention one thing. My doctor and I discussed increasing one of my medications. The drug is question is Quitepine Furmate. This is a very powerful sedative the effect of which, like alcohol, is to Sloooowwww my Braaaaiiiin riggggghhhht dowwwwnnn. Apparently this is something I'm going to need a lot more of if I'm going to find a place within the British Establishment.