Tuesday 15 October 2013

Operation Misery: Month 8, Week 2, Day 3.

Since my previous post on the subject Rihanna has not performed any concerts anywhere in the world. However in that post I mentioned that Rihanna's visit on Sunday (13/10/13) to a South African safari park was likely to cause trouble by pulling the issue of wildlife conservation into sharp focus. Well today those problems have turned up.

Way back in April right around the time Rihanna was performing her California, US concerts and reuniting with Chris Brown staff at the UK's Edinburgh zoo decided that their female Panda Tian Tian was pregnant following a course of artificial insemination. This prompted a long pregnancy watch which involved much discussion about any possible change to Tian Tian's behaviour. As Tian Tian - along with all other Pandas - belongs to China this set up a bilateral discussion between the UK and China that could well have been used as a coded discussion about the state of Rihanna's mind and uterus. For example on September 24th (24/9/13) just as Rihanna was performing in Perth, Australia it was announced that Edinburgh zoo's Panda in closure was being closed to the public because Tian Tian had become highly sensitive to light and noise. Apparently in a Panda this is considered normal pregnancy behaviour but in a human such as Rihanna it can be considered a sign of extreme stress and emotional vulnerability.

With the average Panda pregnancy lasted 22 weeks it was around the start of September people were becoming very suspicious as to why Tian Tian had not given birth. Prompted in part by Rihanna's visit to a South African safari park and in part by the UK finance ministers visit to China the UK has today finally owned up and admitted that Tian Tian is not pregnant. Obviously they couldn't just come out and say; "We lied" so instead they are claiming that Tian Tian was pregnant but suffered a miscarriage. The exact phrase they used was; " she lost it" which could be interpreted as someone (possibly Rihanna) losing their mind and having a nervous breakdown.

Edinburgh zoo went on to talk about how they feel they did everything they could, collected lots of valuable scientific data for analysis and are confident that Tian Tian will shortly experience a successful pregnancy. This seems to be the UK apologising in advance to the Gulf Monarchs because although I want to tempt fate it now seems a lot less likely that Rihanna's planned meltdown in the UAE will actually materialise. However in the event that it does the UK is also attempting cover itself by talking about zoo staff doing all they can to ensure that Tian Tian gets the peace, quiet and privacy she needs to recover from this tragic incident. That way if the UAE meltdown does happen the UK can claim its hands are clean and blame it all on the US.

If the Tian Tian story wasn't enough at the UK's London zoo a female Sumatran Tiger Melati also fell pregnant at roughly the same time. Although this was kept secret at the time and the nature of the pregnancy has still not been revealed this set up another pregnancy watch this time involving Indonesia where Sumatran tigers are native, the US where the daddy Tiger Jae Jae is from and Australia's Perth zoo where Melati was born. According to her Internet personal profile (no really) Melati is a big fan of Chanel no5  which obviously makes her a perfect coded reference to Rihanna. For example when Melati actually gave birth on September 22nd (22/9/13) it was all recorded on secret cameras hidden inside the enclosure. With Rihanna heading to Australia at the time this was supposed to give the impression that Rihanna was under constant covert surveillance creating speculation about who had access to the tapes and making Rihanna extra paranoid.

On Saturday staff at London zoo found Meltai's new cub which hadn't been named or sexed dead by a pool in the enclosure. This was also publicly announced today and seems to being used as a way to further downplay the risk of a UAE meltdown possibly in an attempt to prompt the South Africans to be less gentle with Rihanna. However unlike the Tian Tian announcement this seems less well scripted leading me to believe that staff at London zoo don't actually know what happened. Therefore I suppose it is possible that by using the pregnancy in this political way has somehow tainted the cub in the eyes of the mother causing her to reject it by killing it.

As for the actual Rihanna apparently she's got her mother and cousins visiting her in South Africa and they all spent yesterday visiting an aquarium. As far as I'm concerned this is all fine because with the Malian summer not really happening Rihanna's relationship with her family isn't exactly of huge intelligence value and most things Rihanna's will do in South Africa will involve wildlife or the countries natural beauty in some way or another. However if Rihanna did literally go and swim with actual sharks I will need to see pictures and/or video.

13:30 on 15/10/13 (UK date).

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