Sunday 13 October 2013

Operation Misery: Month 8, Week 2, Day 1.

Subtitled; "Getting My Excuses in Early."

Having arrived in South Africa yesterday (12/10/13) Rihanna will this evening perform a concert in Johannesburg. This is the first concert of this third leg of Rihanna's Diamonds World Tour that will happen more or less in my timezone. However this actually presents me with a different set of problems.

As I think it is well established that Rihanna's CIA handlers/Live Nation (the management) will be insisting on their information blackout it will take 1-2 hours for unofficial information about the concert to become available. As South Africa is a developing rather then a developed nation this may take even longer. It will then take me about another hour to process that information and at least a further hour to write up a review. Assuming that Rihanna takes to the stage on time this takes me through to around 00:00-01:00 by which time I plan on being far too drunk to write a detailed round up of recent events surrounding Rihanna.

Take for example the fact that on Friday (11/10/13) a Court in Los Angeles granted Rihanna a temporary restraining order against Jonathan Whopper who attempted to break into Rihanna's home on September 29th (29/9/13) and October 4th (4/10/13). According to the application Mr Whopper believed that Rihanna was to be his future wife and on the October 4th visit threw a garden chair through a glass door at the address. As since the 2012 para-Olympic closing ceremony I have taken to referring to Rihanna as my 'Twittter wife" and am currently facing charges over some glass smashing related matters this clearly seems to be intended as a reference to me. As such the attack on Rihanna seems to have been carried out in order to leave Rihanna with no other option then to apply for a restraining order against Mr Whopper. The intention being that in low level gossip this will be interpreted as Rihanna rejecting me and my views and fully endorsing the management's plan for Rihanna's tour and her relationship with Chris Brown.

Coming on  the International Day of the Girl when her western puppeteers were hoping that Malala Yousafzai would be awarded the Nobel Peace Prize for her campaign for women's education the management were hoping that in more intellectual circles the restraining order hearing would be viewed as part of the "Rehabilitation of Rihanna" narrative that they've be trying to run since roughly the 2012 para-Olympic closing ceremony. The idea being that they are setting Rihanna these sort of challenges in order to empower her by teaching Rihanna to take responsibility for aspects of her own life through things like applying for a restraining order against Chris Brown. This "Rehabilitation of Rihanna" narrative is of course a nonsense intended to give a fig leaf of respectability to what is in reality just an attempt to inflict pain for the sake of inflicting pain.

As such unless there is some major crisis to deal with I don't intend to review tonight's concert until tomorrow -  probably in the afternoon. That decision of course has nothing to do with the fact the concert clashes with "Homeland."

12:20 on 13/10/13.

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