Sunday 20 January 2008

Update on the DVD marathon.

I have now finished with Ultimate Force and have moved on to season 3 of House. As usual this has led me in to a sort of sarcasm Olympics where every question I'm asked is met with the driest, most sardonic and unhelpful answer I can think of in the hope that I will be able to outdo the power of master.
I'm almost halfway through and I think the pile of films will be moved onto next especially as for some reason I went out and brought three more. Obviously the Wire will be left until last, mainly for the purpose of bad puns.

The DVD watching is being inhibited slightly by my new obsession - a computer game in which I command a team of WW2 commandos deep behind enemy lines. More problem solving then violence this game manages to be taxing enough to be entertaining without being difficult enough to be annoying, an addictive combination. This coupled with the history channels wall to wall Nazism means that I am in danger of actually being convinced that it is the spring of 1944 and I'm about to be dropped deep behind enemy lines to carry out a vital and dangerous mission.

This delusion might not be that far from the truth because tomorrow I set sail for Purley. For those of you that don't know Purley is located in South Croydon and with its big roads, crappy golf course and self important private school Purley represents something of Croydon's "Problem district". The other reason that I'm none to pleased to be heading off in that direction is that I am going to my charities head office to follow up my grievance meaning that I get to spend the whole afternoon explaining in great detail exactly what said staff member has done to annoy me and no doubt once again get to go through that infamous letter line by line. On top of that I rarely go to Purley so my piss poor sense of direction, sharpened by years of studying geography, means that I will probably get lost.

The news this weekend has, aside from the near orgasmic joy of a plane being crashed landed heroically by a Mr Coward, been a bit dull. The only vaguely interesting things to happen is the news that Northern Rock is no longer to be nationalised but the government will still provide financial support to any private sector partners who will end this sorry saga which started as a non-event and only found legs when it became a series of ever more embarrassing fuck ups by the government. Also Israel has killed around 30 odd in Gaza and cut off all energy supplies plunging the region into darkness while shutting down it's hospitals and sewage system so they'll soon be able to cleanse the region of those dirty Arab's and declare the region part of a greater Israel meaning they'll be able to set their sights on Iran's oil fields by the autumn.

In more local news I've received a sample of herbal remedy which could in the future be used to treat alcoholics. This blend of Danish hops and minerals is known as Carlsberg and I have to tell you after a few doses of this stuff you lose all interest in beer as an ideological concept. Apparently the Danes are sad to see it leave but I'm sure that pales in comparison to the sorrow we feel to see it arrive.

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