That's one way to spend an evening I suppose.

I came back from dinner this evening to discover my grandmother had been burgled again. Well I say burgled what actually happened was;

Some woman comes to her front door and starts giving some story about having to borrow a pen so she could leave a note with our next door neighbour. As my grandmother opens the door to talk to her a bloke, who was bizarrely a spitting image of said next door neighbour, pushes past her a goes into the house. The woman then starts giving it the "Let me come in and help you" nonsense. After all of 90 seconds the man, having been unable to find anything of value, comes back out. He flashes my grandmother a home made police warrant card and tells her that someone has broken into her house and stolen all her money. Presumably he did this in the hope that my gran would let the pair of them in and show them where she keeps her valuables.

My gran, being my gran, is having none of this and kicks the woman in the shin leaving the pair of them to limp away empty handed.

Obviously we got the police down and I have to say the were actually very polite and very helpful. A Scene of Crime officer turned up and attempted to insinuate that the crime had been carried out by what he described as "members of Britain's travelling community." I didn't really have the heart to explain to him that most of the gypsies I know have more class then to rob an 87 year old woman, choosing instead to go after rich people. We did establish though that these two were White, British and settled locals a combination of factors that rather explains their innate crapness.

I dunno though, Britain, where we can't even get competent burglars anymore.