The 2016 Eurovision Song Contest: Grand Final. Pt2.

This should be read as a direct continuation of part one; http://watchitdie.blogspot.co.uk/2016/05/the-2016-eurovision-song-contest-grand.html

Before I get into the main politics of this year's contest there was something of an sideshow of opening act depending on whether you want to use a circus or concert metaphor.

This of course was the latest round of fighting over the Nagrono-Karabakh region (NKR) between Armenia and Azerbaijan. This conflict has been running on and off since 1988. Some would argue it even goes back as far as the Russian revolution of 1917.

Armenia: Their entry "Love Wave" by Iveta Mukuchyan was actually selected for competition back in October 2015. As a result it makes no real reference to the latest round of fighting which really only began to emerge towards the end of February 2016.

2015 was the 100th anniversary of the Armenian genocide in which some 1.5 million Armenians were slaughtered by Ottoman Turkish troops and millions more were forcibly deported. At the start of his Presidency Barack Obama declared that he was going to formally recognise the Armenian Genocide despite objections from Turkey. As we approach the final few months of Obama's Presidency we're still waiting.

At the 2014 Song Contest there was a bit of a conspiracy between nations to crown Armenia the winner. That would mean that the 2015 Song Contest would take place in Armenia almost exactly on the day of the genocide centenary. That would obviously have put a lot of pressure on Turkey to recognise the genocide, apologise and promise never to do it again.

The problem is that as part of this conspiracy Austria accidentally produced possibly the greatest Eurovison Song Contest entry ever in the form of Conchita Wurst. This bearded drag queen very much paid homage to Kim Kardashian - possibly the World's most famous Armenia. Much to Austria's annoyance they ended up winning and hosting the 2015 contest. That is despite their entire entry being dedicated to getting Armenia to host.

Due to the fighting in Shamali Province the 2015 contest was actually horrific. It was so lacking in subtly it was as if someone had draw a battleline on the issue down the centre of the arena floor and demanded nations line up on either side. The Armenian genocide barely got mentioned at all as people were to busy either opposing or supporting the current genocide.

This year's Armenian entry borrowed very heavily from the recent Adele song "Hello." As in "Hello. After all these year's do you still remember me?"

In terms of her look Mukuchyan was very much paying homage to Kim Kardashian. Not only was this a reference to Kim Kardashian being possibly the World's most famous Armenian but the fact that she is American. That was intended to make clear that they were trying to get America and particularly Obama's attention over the genocide issue.

The look of the video in support of the song bore a strong resemblance to the video for "Heroes" by Alesso featuring the Swedish singer Tove Lo. With Sweden being this year's host and last year's winner this was intended to make clear that they were trying to get Eurovision's attention on the genocide issue.

Although a completely different song Sweden's winning song was also called "Heroes." The heroes of that song were the Cyborg soldiers of the Shamali Province's genocidal junta. This is obviously a way for Armenia to reference that in a far from complimentary manner.

During last year's final Tove Lo exposed her breasts during a festival appearance in America. As a result whenever you clicked on the Twitter hashtag #Swedish following the Swedish victory you didn't get people talking about Eurovision but pictures of Tove Lo's breasts. In Internet circles this is known as "Google-whacking" when thousands of pages on the same topic push all pages on a similar sounding topic to the bottom of the search rankings. Although I don't think it was the case on this occasion this can be done deliberately.

Tove Lo's big breakthrough single was "Stay High" in 2014. This was essentially about using drink and drugs to mask the pain of a bad break-up. That is obviously quite edgy stuff for a mainstream pop-song. Since then Tove Lo has gone to America and currently doing a single with one of the highly sanitised Jonas brothers. Therefore it is extremely easy to mock her for selling out her artistic integrity for large stacks of US dollars.

As such this was Armenia filing a strongly worded complaint about Sweden's handling of the genocide issue while touching on the sex, nudity, censorship theme that always comes up.

Beyond the genocide issue there really wasn't much else to Armenia's entry. Iveta Mukuchyan's family did flee as refugees to Germany in 1991. Although it went unspoken what they were speaking refuge from was the fighting over NKR. The NKR conflict has always come up in some way, shape or form at every Song Contest since 1988.

The point was also made that Mukuchyan appeared in the 2012 version of "The Voice" in Germany which indicates support for Germany's stance on refugees. Although with general feeling on the issue shifting recently Armenia may have regretted choosing their entry so early. The fact she performed Sweden's 2012 Song Contest winner "Euphoria" by Loreen took some of the sting out of the criticism of Sweden while suggesting that like Norway they preferred the old Sweden.

After returning to Armenia from Germany and before returning to Germany to do The Voice Mukuchyan studied at the premier music conservatory in Armenia. Recently emphasising a fondness for complex, classical music over trashy pop has become a way to indicate support for Russia over America. This strong link between Armenia and Russia was really driven home by the fact that Mukuchyan won "Discovery of the Year" at the 2010 Armenia Awards held in the Russian capital Moscow.

Azerbaijan: Their entry "Miracle" by Samra was selected much more recently than Armenia but before the latest round of fighting in NKR. Rather demonstrating who is responsible for this latest round of fighting the Azeri entry is all about NKR.

It is a very dramatic piece that invokes the imagery of war such as fire, smoke and fury. It also features lyrics like; "Yeah, we built this castle based on lies" and; "Gonna take a miracle, oh oh" it is full blooded call on the Azeri's to wipe out NKR once and for all while taunting Armenia that there is nothing they can do to stop them.

It is so aggressive that they felt the need to include the lyric; "We crash and we burn, you live and you learn" to reassure Eurovision that they don't intend to carry out another Armenian genocide.


Much is made of the fact that Samra is a fan of the black music with her citing Aretha Franklin, Diana Ross and Beyonce as her main influences. She says that her big dream is to play the Beyonce role in the movie/stage show "Dreamgirls."

However rather suggesting that Azerbaijan might have misread the invite this is not used to indicate to support or opposition to the US. Instead it is used to launch a vicious racist tirade against that most famous Armenian Kim Kardashian and by extension all the people of her homeland. It had the general tone off;

"What?! You think your n*gger president or your n*gger loving queen is going to be able to save you?! F*ck off, you fucking disgust me. Just look at her not only does she let a n*gger f*ck her she's gone and had two nasty little brown n*gger babies with the n*gger c*nts!"

Apart from her fascination with the black music much was made of the fact that Samra got to the quarter-final of "The Voice of Turkey" where she performed "Wrecking Ball" by Miley Cyrus. This was the Azeri's going; "We've got the full backing of Erdogan to crush you scum."

In fact I think Azerbaijan decided to embrace their full bore racism as a way to signal to Russia that despite their ever closer ties with Erdogan they've not forgotten their longstanding alliance with Russia. The joke everyone else was enjoying of course is that Russia is actually a racially diverse nation. Those who assume it's all white are themselves being a bit racist.

So much like the NKR conflict I think it's fair to assume that Azeris have mis-understood what is going on around them on this occasion.

It almost goes without saying that during the first semi-final in which both Armenia and Azerbaijan performed venue security 'forgot' to enforce the "No NKR flags" rule. Apparently the two nations were only communicating with each other through armed police bodyguards that Sweden not only provided but insisted on.

During Armenia's Grand Final performance holograms of backing dancers were projected not onto the backdrop but onto the stage itself. Given their ghostly appearance this was clearly intended to be a reference to both the ghosts of the genocide and the Armenian diaspora.

Iveta Mukuchyan wore an elaborate Kim Kardashian style black gown. This was obviously in keeping with the motif of mourning. However it also gave Armenia the opportunity to respond to Azerbaijan by going;

"Nope. We've got no problem with letting the black touch us."

I thought that was a rather witty last minute addition.

15:45 on 16/5/16 (UK date).