As I mentioned throughout the 2014 Winter Para-Olympics there was a degree of tension between the Russians who were hosting the games, Channel 4 (C4) who were broadcasting the games in the UK and me who was watching. Following the end of Sunday's (16/3/14) closing ceremony broadcast C4 put on a special evening of programing to look at this tension in detail.
The main part of this was the climax of C4's "Live From Space" which was a mini-season of programs about space exploration. This began on Wednesday (12/3/14) mid-way through the United Nations Framework Convention of Climate Change (UNFCCC) meeting in Bonn, Germany. UNFCCC meetings are always complicated and technical but this meeting was especially so focused on what mitigation efforts nations would take, the specifics of how those efforts would be measured and how they would be monitored and verified. As a result it led to something of a beauty contests between nations all desperate to show off their scientific abilities.
C4's Live From Space season obviously showcased the US' work through NASA and attempted to closely link the UK to NASA's work. Obviously the hope was that not too many people would pick up on the fact that the International Space Station (ISS) is in fact an international effort. Relying heavily on satellite data the search for Malaysian Airlines flight MH370 was supposed to show that Malaysia - and by extension the UK Commonwealth - was at the centre of a discussion about everyone's latest technology. This type of satellite and surveillance technology will of course play a key role in measuring atmospheric pollution and things like forest loss.
The climax of the "Live From Space" season was a live show called "A Lap of the Earth" which followed the ISS as it made a complete orbit around the earth. Aiming to explain the entire history, structure and meaning of the universe astronomy and astro-physics are rather mind-blowing subjects and this is especially true if you attempt to deal with them having smoked marijuana. Added to that the show was presented by Dermot O'Leary. Some people may know that when I went to visited my lesbian wife in Spain we were unexpectedly joined by the producer of Dermot O'Leary's BBC Radio 2 show who proceeded to ruin the entire trip not least by immediately contracting chronic food poisoning. As a result it is fair to say that Dermot O'Leary and I are known to each other even if I've yet to hear him formally apologise. Finally "A Lap of the Earth" was a live show with lots of delays as communication with the ISS was lost and then re-established. This left with the presenters with lots of time to fill and they chose to fill it with a lot of what could be considered coded references to my movements around the house which they were able to monitor in some way.
As a result I think it's important for me to look in more detail at what I actually got up to following the end of the closing ceremony. Basically this can be summed up in terms of drinking more alcohol, smoking more marijuana, eating pizza and finally taking a little bit of cocaine. During this time I was also somewhat active of Twitter.
The first part of this involved responding to a BBC Sport story about how TeamGB intended to build on it's Sochi 2014 successes. This story was illustrated by a picture of TeamGB's visually impaired skiers Kelly Gallagher and Jade Etherington along with their guides. One way that TeamGB could build on its efforts to increase the profile of disabled sports and portray Jade Etherington as a disabled sex symbol would be to get her into modelling jobs for fashion/men's magazines. Although I think the fashion world has a somewhat undeserved reputation for being bitchy and spiteful it is an entirely visual medium meaning that it all comes down to a person's physical appearance. This can be hard to deal with for someone who is not used to it and could be particularly difficult for someone who isn't entirely sure what they look like.
This appeared to generate a Tweet from the @CanuckProblems that used to be @SochiProblems and was a big hit during the Olympics although it appeared to peter out during the para-Olympics. I responded with the wording of the Rob Ford/Drake meme that I wanted to use during the TeamUSA V Canada hockey semi-final but couldn't find. Basically it showed a picture of Rob Ford and Drake together above the words; "Both of these men grew up in an affluent Toronto suburb. Unfortunately one of them turned to a life of drugs, gangs and crime. The other is Drake."
I then took the opportunity to publicly send Rihanna a picture I'd been trying to bring up in conversation for a while. This was a teeny, tiny (the best I could find) picture of Russian Cosmopolitan's Olympic issue which featured two female para-Olympians of the cover in a sort of sexy pose. The first interesting thing about this was that it feature para-Olympians on the front cover. The other interesting thing was that there were vague lesbian overtones to the image. As such it seemed to be promoting the para-Olympics while at the same time linking the physiological basis for disability with the physiological basis for homosexuality highlighting that both are pre-determined and therefore not a choice. I think that this was a far more productive effort then American Vogue's efforts that featured Rihanna on the cover and Alexander Wang's ridiculous "Principle 6/1.2.6" campaign.
It was around this point I decided that "A Lap of the Earth" was going to be to big for me to ignore so I would be better off sitting and watching it and waiting for it to pass. During this time I also decided to see if I could put the presenters off their game much as they were trying to put me off mine. If I had to score it myself I would say that I won.
At around 13:20 on 21/3/14 (UK date) there is a little bit more to add but I really need to go and get dressed.
Edited at around 15:05 on 21/3/14 (UK date) to add;
As soon as "A Lap of the Earth" had finished I picked up where I had left off by pointing out to Rihanna - as privately as she allows - that not only has she wasted more then a year of her life chasing shadows she'd also wasted a fair bit of mine.
I then finally found a use for the "Rob Ford: Thug Life" meme. As I couldn't find the image I wanted I downloaded this before the TeamUSA V Canada hockey game alongside the one about meeting Drake ruining Rob Ford's career that I actually used. I think that the fact it had been sitting on my computer since then had prompted a bit of discussion about who was aware of it and what I intended to do with it. Although I don't want to get into anyone's private business the author of @CanuckProblems has been hinting that he is gay - especially when I was joking about setting him up with Miley Cyrus. As such the "We didn't choose this life" message seemed appropriate for the end of the Sochi para-Olympics.
After a moment of pause I decided to the share the video for "Paul McCartney & Wings" song "Mull of Kintyre" because I'd had that stuck in my head since Friday (14/3/14) and it was really starting to make my brain itch. Experience has taught me that often listening to a song a couple times can really help get it out of your head.
I then proceeded to publicly send US Secretary of State John Kerry the video to a song called "I Bombed Korea" by the band "Cake." This was to highlight the fact that the two hour delay created by "A Lap of the Earth" meant that I was now crashing the start of the working week in the eastern hemisphere. I followed this up by posting multiple links to the far superior Hebrew version of the song entitled "I Bombed Beirut" from the film "Waltz With Bashir" alongside references to various Syrian, Lebanese and Libyan cities.
This was a reference to the fact that all the pressure that Russia has been under during the Sochi games - the threats of terrorist attack, the gay-rights campaign and the coup in Ukraine - were all simply the US trying to be seen by their Saudi and Qatari pay-masters to be getting tough with Russia over its support for the Syrian government. That is why the US has been so keen to show its support for the Kiev 'government' in order to stop them realising they are simply "Useful Idiots" to use the Cold War terminology. To really drive home the point during the para-Olympics a real publicity effort was made to draw attention to the disputed third anniversary of the war in Syria that occurred on Saturday March 15th (15/3/14).
Throughout the situation in Crimea all the rhetoric from the west and the US in particular has been about the need to respect Ukraine's "Sovereignty and Territorial Integrity." The conflict in Syria has completely disregarded the sovereignty and territorial integrity of both that nation and its neighbour Lebanon and killed about 1.5 million people in the process. As such the song "I Bombed Beirut" seemed like a good way of pointing out that I am done taking lectures on international law from any nation that has supported the assault on Syria. Plus it really helped getting the song out of my head.
As that was a bit of a heavy thought to leave things on I did another rendition of "Mull of Kintyre" and went to bed.
15:40 on 21/3/14 (UK date).
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment