Look When I Do it,

It's not classed as talking it's classed a writing.

So for the record I most certainly didn't do a line of coke in the toilets at the Royal Courts of Justice on Friday December 2nd (2/12/11). I did though do a quick bump of Red Bull snuff so that long line of snotty nosed young solicitors are in fact lying.

In the next four hours of silent fury though my brother did confess to my father that he appeared on BBC Radio Scotland earlier in the week talking about tattoos in the workplace. Anyway when we entered into the court at around 14:15 the three of us found ourselves sitting in the first bench in front of Mrs Justice Hogg who was sitting behind three junior female clerks who looked like they were there on work experience and the clerk to the Justice who I swear I sat opposite on the London Underground (Tube) on the way up. Then my little brother doing his best impression of Marcus Brigstoke on this evening's (2/12/11) episode of Have I Got News For You (filmed 1/12/11) said something along the lines of; " I think this application is motivated more by money then anything else." Which is all you would expect from someone who charges about £40 per go but would never pay VAT.

In my eyes I think that this means that regardless of her marital status Mrs Justice Hogg has failed her heterosexuality test. If you think you are familiar with that name then Mrs Justice Hogg was the Judge who ruled in the Madeline McCann case. Madeline McCann was of course the young British girl who was killed in Portugal by her parents Kate and Gerry MacCann. However despite the clear evidence presented to the court that these two doctors had accidentally killed their daughter with an overdose and then lied to cover it up Mrs Justice Hogg somehow managed to rule that Madeline McCann was still alive causing an international incident with Portugal.

Now at around 23:10 while I try to remember what my point was and why I must stop talking I can't help but stop salivating at the prospect of Group B in the Euro 2012 tournament: the Netherlands, Denmark, Germany, Portugal.