The Still Not Worthy of the Name 2017. Pt.2

This should be read as a continuation of Part 1; http://watchitdie.blogspot.co.uk/2017/05/the-still-not-worthy-of-name-2017.html

 

The Rise of the Robots: Robots have a long history within art and literature. They're often used as a metaphor for the oppression of the working class by the ruling class.

The term "Robot" was actually coined by Czech playwright Karel Capek in his 1920 play; "Rossum's Universal Robots." The term is a shorting of the Czech word; "Robotnik" meaning; "Slave." When scientists and engineers first developed robots some 30 years later they took the name from the play.

This process of life imitating art has continued. Now the jobs of the working classes are increasingly under threat. Not from immigrants but from robots and Artificial Intelligence (AI) systems. This has become an increasing area of interest not just in Europe but globally.

Back in the June 2016 Switzerland actually held a public referendum on paying citizens a yearly income to compensate for the loss of job opportunities caused by technology. No-one involved actually expected to win but I think they should be congratulated for getting the matter on the ballot and triggering a public debate.

In February 2017 Finland introduced a universal welfare payment regardless of whether the recipients were in work or not. This was done to encourage people who'd been made unemployed by technology into casual work with their income topped up by the government.

Certainly since the invention of democracy by the ancient Greeks governments funding model has been based on taxing the wages of workers. If those workers are replaced by robots who are not paid wages society as we know it starts to collapse. So the issue of how to restructure society to compensate for technological advances is now on the fringes of mainstream politics in many European nations.

Through their extremely poor organisation the 2017 hosts have actually inadvertently provided a talking point about this issue of technology.

The Song Contest is supported by a website - Eurovision.tv. For every competing nation this provides a package of information about the competitor. This includes a video containing at least the song, short biographies of the performer and the songwriters. It also provides the lyrics of the song in the language it is performed along with English and French translations.

This year the website is very badly designed and essentially unfinished. For example Croatia's entry was not included at all. However for all the competitors the English and French translations are missing entirely.

So unless you happen to speak Belorussian or Hungarian and you want to know what the lyrics mean you have to feed them into an online translator. Google have recently re-launched a new version of its translation system. This relies of what is termed a; "Neural Network." This complex form of AI mimics the human thought process allowing the system to learn like a human would.

At this point neural networks operate at around the level of a severely mentally retarded human child. According to Bing's translation system there is a Man/Woman/Elephant named "Nelly" who is apparently central to the current efforts to liberated the northern Iraqi city of Mosul from the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL).

So we're nowhere near the point where these AI systems could go all Skynet and launch a war against their human masters. However as more and more - particularly defence - systems are computerised it is now a matter of reality that an enemy could hack into, say, our computer controlled drones and use those weapons against us.

Back in 2010 there was of course the "Stuxnet" virus which caused all sorts of problems with Iran's nuclear centrifuges. Then there are these computer controlled missiles that the Democratic People's Republic of Korea (DPRK/North) keep launching only for them to crash soon after launch.

Just on Friday (12/5/17) - as the professional juries were casting their votes - more then 200,000 computer networks across 150 countries were attacked by a virus called "Wanna Cry." The targets included Britain's taxpayer funded National Health Service (NHS).

 

This is a type of ransomware that locks a user out of their computer and its important files until they pay a ransom. It is typical of the sort of cyberattack increasingly perpetrated by organised and semi-organised criminals. 

 

It's a modern day equivalent of a protection racket. However rather than threatening to firebomb someones business unless they pay up the cyber criminals are threatening to lock those businesses out of their files.

Since July 2016 the US Democrat Party have been claiming that the computer system of their National Committee (DNC) was hacked and important information leaked. Throughout this long-running story the DNC have repeatedly refused investigators such as the FBI access to their computer systems to conduct an investigation.

As a result we only have the Democrats word for any of this. 

 

However the Democrats claim that the hackers used a piece of software that created in Ukraine and released into the public domain late 2014/early 2015. With most Ukrainians speaking Russian this code contained elements of the Russian alphabet. The Democrats have used this to claim that the Russian government were responsible for the hack and their Republican opponent and now President Donald Trump is a Russian spy.

The Wanna Cry virus is based on code that was created by the US' National Security Agency (NSA) in order to spy on the funding of Palestinian groups but was put in the public domain in early April 2017.

So following the US Democrats reasoning the US has just conducted the one of the largest cyberattacks ever seen against 77% of the nations on Earth. Quite the accusation.

 

Marvel's Agents of S.H.E.I.L.D: This US TV Show is a spin-off from the Marvel comic books Avengers universe.

However it is primarily a show all about hidden meanings. So for example you will have scenes where characters are arguing about some complex piece of fictional science. However what they're really arguing about is their relationships with each other and other characters.

One of the main characters is Sky/Daisy. Recently she's started to bear more than a passing resemblance to the US popstar Demi Lovato. Demi Lovato is famously a recovering Cocaine addict. The Daisy character certainly suffers from a lot of nosebleeds as she learns to harness her power and fame.

Back in 2016 Demi Lovato released the faux lesbian anthem; "Cool For the Summer" to appeal to the pink pound, gay and the heterosexual teenage boy markets. The increasingly butch looking Daisy character suddenly started getting dispatched to Dykers New York for missions.

This theme of hidden meaning and being bitchy about popstars is very much at the heart of the Eurovision Song Contest. So there are likely many fans of Shield in the Eurovision community. With this new season it seems to have turned into a mutual appreciation society.

A particularly big theme of the 2016 Song Contest was sex, nudity and how much flesh it is appropriate to flash.

This current season of Shield is still very much aimed at minors and young adults and sticks firmly to the US' tight but irrational broadcasting regulations. However in this season there is certainly a lot more flesh on display.

For example in previous seasons if a female character was shown in her underwear she'd be wearing a tank-top or a sports-bra. In this season it's much more likely she'll be wearing just a normal bra.

This all seems to be a very knowing nod to the show's Eurovision fans.

Shield's main storyline this season revolves around an AI system which I think is known as the Artificial Intelligence Desk Assistant (AIDA). I think the season is still in production and I'm certainly well behind with my watching but as one character says; "Did they not watch any movies from the 1980's? The robots always turn evil."

Shield is produced by Joss Whedon. His last big TV project was the show; "Dollhouse." This centred around the shadowy Rossum Corporation. They'd found a way to replace humans brains with interchangeable AI systems giving them all sorts of special skills.

One of the main characters in Dollhouse was; "Alpha" played by the actress Amy Acker. Amy Acker has just finished another show called; "Person of Interest" which is about two rival super AI systems doing battle with each other.

Although it firmly fits into the category of; "Hangover TV" I seem to remember a recent episode of Person of Interest being set in a hospital. The evil super AI system was changing patient records and the labels on drugs etc in order to purge society of individuals it deemed unworthy.

Amy Acker and Joss Whedon are really close friends. To the point that by only skimming a review of their production of "Romeo & Juliet" I was convinced for a long time that they were a married couple. This misconception was not helped by Amy Acker's appearance in Shield as the love beyond all other loves interest of the main character.

So as Amy Acker is finishing up Person of Interest her old friends at Shield are using their AI storyline to cheer her along. After all she was undoubtedly the best thing in a show that otherwise suffered from a complete sense of humour bypass.

This convergence between Shield's Eurovision fanclub and the wider issue of technology means that within the 2017 contest one is often used to discuss the other. So someone may reference the TV Show to discuss technology and someone else may reference technology to discuss the TV Show.

Both within fiction and reality AI and robotics are touted as the key to eternal life. Once the human body is withered by age the mind can be converted into an AI and then uploaded into a robot. So the issue of ageing and the diseases of ageing is also used to discuss these twin topics.

For example the video for Macedonia's "Dance Alone" by Jana Burceska features an elderly widow donning a virtual reality headset to once again experience the carefree life of a vibrant young woman.

Also back in 2015 the windows of my late grandmother's house were broken by a Romanian in a failed attempt to break in. Rather than being the work of the Romanian state this was the work of a single drunk Romanian being an arse. However while everyone was working that out it put a lot of pressure on the Romanian state.

During US President Trump's inauguration in January 2017 I experienced another similarly unsuccessful break-in attempt. This was carried out by the British state over events that were occurring at the time in Gambia - henceforth known as Nookta Sound.

On this occasion Romania quickly and correctly denied any involvement. They did so in such a way as to indicate that they were so carefully monitoring the situation they were able to tell you exactly how far I'd gotten through the stack of episodes of Shield I had piled up on my DVR.

That's obviously quite an interesting spy story. Particularly amongst members of the European Broadcasting Union (EBU) which produces the Song Contest.

None of these themes have really been anyone's main issue. So the references to it have all been small and subtle.

For example in the show Dollhouse the process of wiping one AI program and replacing it with another is known as; "A Treatment." Britain's entry; "Never Give You Up" by Lucie Jones is part produced by a collective known as; "The Treatment."

In Shield and other shows that deal with AI's and Robots like the UK's "Humans" the robots are often shown in regimented lines either nude or wearing basic underwear.

The video for the Czech Republic's entry "My Turn" by Martina Barta features her singing alongside lots of people of all ages, genders and races dressed in basic underwear. 

 

The stage costume of Fused Marc who represented Lithuania with "Rain of Revolution" is in the very utilitarian style of costumes worn in the TV Show Humans.

 

15:55 on 14/5/17 (UK date).

The Still Not Worthy of the Name 2017

As I've mentioned attempts to stage a 2017 Eurovision Song Contest have been plagued by problems.

This has led to the majority of nations seeming to approach it under the assumption that it would be cancelled. If it did go ahead many were also concerned that they would have to stage a boycott and withdraw. Finally no-one seemed to want risk doing anything that would overshadow Russia's certain victory.

So the most defining feature of this year is just how little effort most people have put into their entries.

The Eurovision Song Contest is very much defined by the people that turn up. However what tends to happen is that nations identify broad political/social issues that are important to them.

Obviously many nations are concerned about the same thing so common threads tend to emerge from this range of issues forming the main trends. In particularly strong years - such as 2016 - a lingua franca or "bridging language" emerges allowing these trends to be discussed in often quite a lot of detail.

This year there haven't so much been common themes as specific issues which small groups of nations have gathered around.

If there is an overarching theme of 2017 it is Shamali Province and the decision to allow them to host the event.

The 2015 Song Contest was dominated by nations being forced to approve or disapprove of the creation of Shamali Province in the broad geographic area of what used to be the nation state of Ukraine in the spring of 2014. In 2016 this had shifted to near universal condemnation of Shamali Province.

This year that chorus of disapproval seems to have shifted into a contest within a contest over who can be the most insulting towards Shamali Province.

That contest has clearly been won by Moldova.

Moldova: They were represented by Sunstroke Project with the song; "Hey Mama."

This is a song about a young man about to take a young woman out on a date. He's reassuring the woman's mother that he's not going to steal her daughter away from her. The man is very clearly Russia while the woman is Crimea and the mother is Shamali Province. The song ends with the man not only running away with the woman but also the mother.

To go and sing this song in Shamali Province is obviously hugely insulting to them. What makes it even more insulting is that it that also teaches Shamali Province the lesson it seems to badly need of how to be really insulting and really political whilst sticking to Eurovision's No Overt Politics rule.

Moldova even went so far as to provide a device to allow the controversy they're courting to be discreetly discussed;

Although not in any way pornographic the video in support of the song is shot in the broad visual style of American pornography. The nearest thing I can compare it to is the video to the 2009 song; "Stacey's Mom" by the US band Fountains of Wayne which is very much aimed at the heterosexual teenage boy market.

The Song Contest is not so gay that it is compulsory. However if you're are looking to win you normally try to appeal to its large gay male fanbase. Very aggressive and in this case particularly puerile displays of heterosexuality can be misconstrued and cause offence.

The video also features a small reference to the very silly video for the very silly Dropkick Murphys song; "The Spicy McHaggis Jig." Thanks in no small part to Melissa McCarthy this is now the official theme music of US White House spokesman and Boston Red Sox fan Sean Spicer.

Particularly within US politics Shamali Province is held up as an example of Russian Aggression and the need to protect the NATO member states of Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania from that Russian aggression. As such you would expect those Baltic states to be amongst the most supportive of Shamali Province.

Latvia: Of the Baltic states they were the most supportive of Shamali Province and in particular the US position. 

They were represented by Tirana Park who are billed as one of the most credible acts within Latvian music. In an effort to prove their credibility they talk frequently about their appearances at the South by Southwest (SXSW) festival in the US state of Texas.

Despite these strong links to the US the most supportive Latvia can be towards Shamali Province is to adopt a position of neutrality.

Their song; "Line" constantly poses a question of whether there is a line and whether it has been crossed.

You could interpret this as a reference to Russia's alleged threats to its border line. However you can also interpret it as a reference to a moral line. The question being whether Shamali Province's junta has any moral standards while expressing frustration that they keep crossing Latvia's own moral line.

However it must be said in their semi-final performance Latvia almost completely dropped the suggestion of neutrality making it very clear they were talking about Shamali Province's lack of a moral line.

The video in support of Latvia's entry also includes references such as an archer to the famous British legend of Robin Hood. This is not to be confused with the other famous British Legend of King Arthur.

The legend of King Arthur is currently being retold in the movie; "King Arthur: Legend of the Sword". Filmed on location in England, Scotland and Wales this movie draws attention to Britain’s constitute nations.

The lead in the movie is played by Charlie Hunnam. I suppose he could be mistaken with another famous British actor Tom Hardy. However not by British Eurovision presenter Scott Mills. He is apparently very focused on every inch of who Tom Hardy is.

Charlie Hunnam rose to fame in the US TV Show; "Sons of Anarchy." Due to scheduling issues I think I've only ever seen about six episodes of this show. However all the episodes I have seen centred around efforts to end the motorcycle gang's long standing business of running guns to Irish Republicans. More of that later.

Estonia: This year Estonia have given us a grand Song Contest love story. They are represented by Koit Toome & Laura.

Laura represented Estonia at the 2005 Song Contest going on to become Estonia's most played radio star that decade. Koit Toome represented Estonia at the 1998 Song Contest going on to be the biggest selling Estonia male singer of that decade. Laura is now the head of the Estonian Jazz Union while Koit Toome is a huge musical theatre star.

The 2017 contest is the first time that these two powerhouses of Estonian music have been brought together as a couple.

The song; "Verona" is written by Sven Lohmus another powerhouse of Estonian music who has had more than 100 hit singles and represented Estonia at the Song Contest four times. The song is said to be inspired by famous British writer William Shakespeare and the Italian city of Verona where Shakespeare set his famous play; "Romeo & Juliet."

The Baltic states and Estonia in particular are very much the success stories of the fall of the Soviet Union. They are all now extremely young, vibrant liberal democracies with strong economies.

Initially Estonia and the Baltic states were supportive of the creation of Shamali Province mistaking it for a popular revolution that would create a nation similar to their own. By invoking the star crossed lovers as an example of western culture Estonia seem to be making it very clear that they have fallen out of love with Shamali Province and its extremely illiberal Nazi and neo-Nazi junta.

I don't want to give away any spoilers but Romeo & Juliet is actually a tragedy. They both end up committing suicide.

Rather than trying to win themselves Estonia actually seem to be lobbying on behalf of the Italian entry. More of that though later.

Lithuania: The most spectacular condemnation of Shamali Province from not just the Baltics but all competitors comes from Lithuania. Not only have they condemned Shamali Province they have completely Trolled them.

I personally think the Internet art form of Trolling gets a bad name. When you hear about it in the tabloid news it's always about someone threatening to kill or rape or generally be abusive towards someone else. This is not Trolling. This is just being extremely rude to people.

Actual Trolling is a much more delicate skill. Obviously there are a variety of techniques but one of my favourites is when you pretend to agree with someone whose views you find repellent. You then very subtly manipulate them in either agreeing with your true views rejecting their views entirely or getting them to agree to things that are so ridiculous they look the fool.

Rather than Russian aggression the majority of Shamali Province's current problems are caused by their junta's extreme racism. They frequently talk about wanting to expel the Russian invaders from their country. However rather than talking about Russian citizens from Russia what they mean is people who are ethnically Russia many of whose ancestors have lived in what was Ukraine for the last thousand years or so.

Apart from trying to kill all the ethnic Russians who tend to live east of the Dnipro River Shamali Province is also trying to exclude them from public life making them second class citizens in their own country. This is being done under the guise of a; "De-Communisation" program which bans the use of the Russian language and removes anything associated with Russia.

2017 of course marks the 100th anniversary of Russia's Communist revolution. Lithuania's song by Fused Marc is entitled; "Rain of Revolution." It presents the notion of revolution as a violent and unpleasant one. With lots of use of fire and smoke in the video it seems to liken the rain to revolution to the raining down of artillery shells.

It's likely that supporters of Shamali Province will look at that and see Lithuania standing shoulder-to-shoulder with them against the evil Communist (Russian) revolutionaries.

In reality Lithuania is delivering a big F*ck You! to Shamali Province making it quite clear that their hateful fascist revolution has nothing to do with the liberal values of tolerance and inclusion that Lithuania aspires to represent.

Unfortunately none of the Baltic states made it through to the Grand Final. Rather than being due to them expressing an unpopular this seems to owe more to the fact that during the first semi-final Shamali Province's Nazis and neo-Nazis were throwing smoke and petrol bombs at the police outside the venue in Kiev.

As such the delicate artistic types who populate the contest seem to have decided they didn't want to spend the week ratcheting up the aggression and hostility to genocidal proportions. As things stood the local security were really not happy.

Of the 41 competitors this year Shamali Province did though manage to find some supporters. Two to be precise.

Georgia: Shamali Province was created during the 2014 Winter Olympics held in Sochi, Russia.

During the 2008 Summer Olympics held in Beijing, China Georgia's then President Mikheil Saaskashvili hit on a rather insane idea. He would attack Georgia's ethnically Russian population in the protection zones of South Ossetia and Abkhazia. This would force Russia to intervene prompting NATO to leap to Georgia's defence triggering a war in which NATO would vanquish Russia.

So in that sense Shamali Province are very much kindred spirits. So much so that when Saakashvili was finally prosecuted by Georgia in 2014 he simply fled to Shamali Province where he became the Mayor of Odessa. A city that seems very fond of petrol bombs.

This year Georgia are represented by Tamara Gachechiladze. In 2009 she was part of the band Stephane & 3G. Their song; "We Don't Wanna Put In" was deemed an overt reference to Russian President Vladimir Putin and therefore in violation of the No Overt Politics rule. Rather than making changes to their entry Georgia that year withdrew their entry and boycotted the contest.

Georgia's song this year; "Keep The Faith" pledges full support to Shamali Province. It urges them to keep the faith and keep doing what they're doing because one day both Georgia and Shamali Province will fulfil their dream of cleansing the entire planet of ethnic Russians.

However the faith referenced in the song is clearly the Christian faith. As such it serves as a veiled warning to Shamali Province's Nazis and neo-Nazi's not to trust the ethnically Turkish or Tartar population who tend to be Muslim.

Also both South Ossetia and Abkhazia have both recently held referendums to rejoin Russia. Therefore the outcome of Saakashvili's 2008 war of aggression is that Georgia has permanently lost two chunks of its territory. That's got some in Georgia doubting whether theirs is really a model for Shamali Province to follow.

The video in support of Georgia's song features a woman who looks a lot like Lucie Jones who is representing the UK this year.

Last year Georgia tried really hard to win with Nika Kocharov and the Young Georgian Lolitaz who were the coolest and most cutting edge band in Georgia at the time. The problem was that the coolest and most cutting edge band in Georgia are a lot like British bands from nearly 30 years ago such as the Stone Roses.

Just before Georgia performed in last year's second semi-final the UK announced that the Stone Roses were reforming to perform for the first time in 20 years. The UK were then forced to apologise profusely for so blatantly insulting Georgia's entry.

Finally Tamara Gachechiladze is white. However in the video she appears with so much fake tan and permed hair you might confuse her as black. In short she looks similar to Rachel Dolezal.

Thus demonstrating that Georgia are once again throwing everything they've got at the contest in the hope that something will stick. But once again Georgia are about several years out of date.

Poland: At the end of the Second World War the allied powers - France, the UK, the US and the Soviet Union - met in Yalta, Crimea. One of the things they agreed at that meeting was to move Poland west. So what is now western Poland used to be part of Germany and eastern Poland used to extend it what is now western Shamali Province.

As a result there are strong cultural links between Poland and Shamali Province. Particularly amongst their Nazis and neo-Nazis. For example the 14th Grenadier Division of Nazi Germany's Waffen SS was made up of Polish Nazis and members of the Ukrainian Insurgent Army (UIA/UPA).

Therefore Poland have long been strong supporters of the creation of Shamali Province and anything to anti-Russian. This is particularly true following the election of the Law & Justice Party (PiS) to Poland's government in 2015.

This increasingly right-wing party frequently tries to distract from opposition at home by spinning increasingly elaborate conspiracy theories about the 2010 plane crash in Smolensk, Russia in which many senior members of the Polish establishment were killed including the President and PiS founder Lech Kaczynski. 

Although its well accepted that this plane crash was an accident and the result of bad weather the PiS continue to try and claim it was a Russian assassination operation.

Poland's are represented this year by Kasia Mos with the song; "Flashlight." This not only expresses support from Shamali Province and more aggression against Russia but urges other European nations to follow suit by shining a light on what they claim is Russian wrongdoing.

The video in support of the song features trees and something of a thick wood. One of PiS' more elaborate conspiracy theories is that after shooting down President Kaczynski's plane the Russians cut holes in trees to make it appear as though the plane had crashed in the woods.

The song is partly written by Rickard Bonde who runs the Mega Music High School stage school in Sweden. Initially Sweden were also very strong supporters of the creation of Shamali Province. So by highlighting the link to Sweden Poland are particularly urging Sweden to continue their support for Shamali Province.

Sweden: This year they are represented by Robin Bengtsson with the song; "I Can't Go On." In a year where subtly is in short supply this makes it quite clear that Sweden now feels that it can no longer go on supporting Shamali Province.

Both in the video and his stage performances Bengtsson is accompanied by sharp suited male dancers. These resemble his security detail or bodyguards in reference to what a dangerous place Shamali Province is to hold a singing competition.

Those dancers performed on treadmills in a clear reference to the 2006 video for the song; "Here We Go Again" by the band OK Go. In this Brexit era that could be the set up for a million and one jokes. However everyone in Eurovision knows that level of plagiarism is only going to see you marked down.

So while Poland continue to support Shamali Province they know they are extremely isolated in that support and in danger of becoming a minority of one within the European Union (EU).

Aside from the long list of nations condemning Shamali Province two also specifically criticised the European Broadcasting Union (EBU) for going ahead with plans to host the 2017 contest in Shamali Province.

Iceland: During the Cold War Iceland was an extremely important if often forgotten about nation. It played host to the Keflavik Air Base. This not only gave the US a forward position from where to attack the Soviet Union it also gave the US' Northern Air Defence (NORAD) advanced monitoring to warn of a potential Soviet strike.

As part of his efforts to increase tensions with Russia former US President Barack Obama announced plans to reopen the Keflavik Air Base in early 2016 as if nuclear war once again loomed. Iceland's Song Contest entry that year - "Hear Them Calling" by Greta Salome - openly mocked Obama's claim of Russian aggression.

Shortly after current US President Donald Trump was inaugurated in January 2017 sections of the US media started putting about the ridiculous conspiracy that Presidents Trump and Putin planned a secret meeting in Iceland. This was inspired by a storyline in the US TV Show "House of Cards" in which the fictional US and Russian Presidents held a secret meeting in the Jordan Valley in Israel/Palestine.

Through their song; "Paper" by Svala Halldarson Iceland was mocking the US media by posing the question of whether Iceland gets a say in any of this or whether the place is just words on a piece of paper to the Americans.

Highlighting their traditional location midway between Russia and the US Iceland was also putting itself forward as an alternative host for the 2017 contest on the assumption that Shamali Province would be stripped of hosting rights.

Also as one of the few nations this year to put much effort into their entry - Svala is Icelandic pop royalty and one time headliner of the San Francisco Gay Pride event in the US - Iceland was also indicating that they'd quite like to host the 2018 Song Contest. The video in support of the song did though take the time to warn people that Iceland is a very cold country.

Malta: This year they were represented by Claudia Faniello with the song; "Breathlessly." As her name suggests Claudia Faniello is the child of an Italian father and Maltese mother. This highlights the solidarity between Italy and Malta over the Mediterranean migrant route.

The video in support of the song starts with a man and a woman in the aftermath of an argument. The video then runs backwards in time to show the argument at a big, expensive gala event - rather like the gala that opens the Song Contest every year.

The message to the EBU being that surely they'd like to go back in time and change their decision to let Shamali Province attempt to host the 2017 contest. After all Malta would be more than happy to step in as a last minute replacement.

The EBU is a pan-European body. However like many other such organisations it is physically based in neutral Switzerland. This year Switzerland took it upon themselves to speak on behalf of the EBU.

Switzerland: They were represented by Timbelle who are a three piece made up of a Romanian signer, a Romanian pianist and a Swiss drummer.

Romania were unable to compete in the 2016 Song Contest because their membership of the EBU had been suspended over the non-payment of membership fees. Romania's debts had been piling up for a number of years so action was always going to come. However I think what drove that action to be taken in 2016 was to serve as a warning to everyone but particularly Shamali Province that rule breaking has consequences.

In light of the EBU's tolerance of Shamali Province's extreme and persistent rule breaking Romania's suspension now seems particularly harsh.

By highlighting the links with Romania Switzerland - adopting the voice of the EBU - was welcoming them back into the fold.

The song is entitled; "Apollo." Apollo is a very important god in both Roman and Greek mythology however through the lead singers style of dress its clear the entry as pushing the Greek interpretation. That shows Apollo to be the god of prophecy and truth.

When Shamali Province was awarded the rights to host the 2017 Song Contest many prophesied that it would be a disaster. The truth is that is has been a disaster.

Apollo is also considered the god of music and healing. So in the voice of the EBU Switzerland were acknowledging that awarding Shamali Province the rights to host the 2017 contest they probably made a mistake. However they were urging everyone to put that mistake behind them and allow everyone to heal. 

It almost goes without saying that Shamali Province continue to support themselves.

Shamali Province: At the 2016 Song Contest Shamali Province not only broke but utterly disregarded the No Overt Politics rule with their song; "1944" by Jamala.

At the time I said this rule was important because it prevents every song becoming a Grindcore or very heavy metal tirade which would create an unwatchable competition. At the 2016 contest a handful or nations actually entered Grindcore tirades in protest at Shamali Province's rule breaking.

This year Shamali Province are represented by O.Torvald with the song; "Time." This is a Grindcore tirade. In the video in support of the song the band perform with bomb style digital red clocks counting down from 3 minutes strapped to their chests. However when they reach zero the clocks start counting forward in green.

As such Shamali Province seem well aware that both time and patience is running out for them. However they are aggressively unapologetic and intent on carrying on doing what they've been doing these past three years.

10:35 on 14/5/17 (UK date).