Yesterday (15/2/16) activists in Northern Syria accused Russia of bombing hospitals in Maaret al-Numan - which sits between Hama City and Idlib City - and Azaz - the Al Qaeda occupied town just north of Aleppo City.
What made this claim so outrageous and so shocking is that it actually happened.
The particular group making this claim is the White Helmets (@SyriaCivilDef) whose work is often clearly branded with the logo of a white helmet inside a blue outline map of Syria on a yellow background. Funded by the United Arab Emirates (UAE), operating from Turkey and headed by a British mercenary the White Helmets are not a humanitarian organisation.
Instead they are a purely military organisation dedicated to psychological warfare. They were formed with the sole purpose of illegally overthrowing the Syrian government. Their main weapon is what is termed "Atrocity Propaganda." That is the deliberate fabrication or exaggeration of atrocities such as war crimes that are blamed on the enemy.
The White Helmets' particular predilection for using children in their propaganda videos itself constitutes a war crime contrary to Article 27 of the Fourth Geneva Convention.
Although it is hard to pick just one perhaps the most outrageous claim made by the White Helmets was that on October 20th 2015 (20/10/15) Russian air-strikes had destroyed the Syrian-American Medical Centre (SAMC) in the town of Sarmin which sits around 5km (3 miles) east of Idlib City.
Having not conducted any air-strikes in the area on the day in question Russia immediately tasked observation satellites and reconnaissance aircraft to inspect the damage to the building. They found absolutely none whatsoever and later released footage of the undamaged building which were confirmed by the US.
There was of course no need for Russia to go to these lengths because part of the video released by the White Helmets was filmed inside the very clearly un-destroyed hospital which they were claiming had been destroyed. Going for a sort of war crime trifecta another section of the same video showed two boys who could be no more then 10 photogenically posed on top of a pile of rubble tearfully telling the world how their parents had been killed in the air-strike that never happened.
Despite the White Helmets own video quite clearly demonstrating that they were lying this story of Russia bombing a hospital was widely reported as fact across much of the World. The source of the video - the White Helmets - was never acknowledged and their credibility as a source was certainly not examined.
It is exactly this type of "Hostile Action" that the International Syria Support Group (ISSG) agreed would cease on Thursday (18/2/16) in preparation for wider ceasefire negotiations.
Obviously the fact that the same media outlets who report the White Helmets' claims as fact also reported Friday's (12/2/16) agreement as a "ceasefire" really highlights the problem.
Unfortunately because the US decided to air its dirty laundry in public at this past weekend's three day Munich Security Conference Saudi Arabia got wind of this.
So yesterday they ordered the arrest/kidnapping of four US journalists in Bahrain. Ever since Saudi troops rolled across the causeway in March 2011 to brutally crush a popular uprising Bahrain has been nothing more then a client state of Saudi Arabia. The message was quite clear; Saudi Arabia will target any western journalist of new agency that dares to report the truth.
Fortunately for the US the Israelis then got involved briefly arresting the Jerusalem bureau chief of the Washington Post on charges of "inciting violence." Not only did this lead to the four US journalist being immediately freed the Saudis also freed the three US citizens they'd been holding hostage in Iraq since January 15th (15/1/16) in an effort to sow division between the US and the Shia militias who are fighting the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) in Iraq.
The locations of yesterday's strikes were also significant. Azaz is of course the Al Qaeda occupied town that Turkey is currently shelling to prevent the Kurdish People's Protection Units (YPG) from liberating. As Al Qaeda are named in various United Nations Security Council (UNSC) Resolutions there is no suggestion that Azaz will be covered by any ceasefire. I hope this post doesn't clash with the closed door UNSC meeting on Turkey's terrorist actions. However with closed door sessions it is always hard to tell.
Similarly Maaret al-Numan sits on the main Highway 60 which runs from the capital Damascus to the Al Qaeda/ISIL occupied Aleppo City. As such it controls the main supply route needed to liberate Aleppo City and therefore - for the same reason as Azaz - will not be covered by any future ceasefire.
It was of course the US who designated the bombing of hospitals as the lingua franca (bridging language) for discussions about war crimes and crimes against humanity in Syria with their much more ferocious attack on a hospital in Kunduz, Afghanistan on October 3rd (3/10/15).
16:45 on 16/2/16 (UK date).
Tuesday, 16 February 2016
Sunday, 14 February 2016
Operation Featherweight: Month 19, Week 3, Day 7.
In my post of January
28th (28/1/16) I mentioned how the Syrian Arab Army (SAA) backed by Russia
air-power had succeeded in liberating all of Latakia Province on January 24th
(24/1/16). What I may have failed to make clear is just how bad tempered this got.
Turkey was of course
furious at the liberation of Latakia. That is because it sealed a roughly 75km
(45 mile) stretch of the border between Turkey and Syria. Turkey had been using
that stretch of territory to supply weapons and fighters to an irregular
division of the Turkish Army known as the Syrian Turkmen Brigades (STB).
As the
the STB are waging war against the SAA - the main force fighting the Islamic State of Iraq and the
Levant (ISIL) - their allegiance to ISIL is beyond dispute.
As if that wasn't
humiliating enough for Turkey as the SAA liberated Rabia - the last town to be
liberated - the Russians deployed a Special Forces - SPETSNAZ- ground unit. That unit's
mission was simple - kill or capture Alparslan Celik. You may remember that
Celik is the Turkish national who appeared as the spokesman for the STB
celebrating the Turkish shooting down of a Russian Su-24 over Syria on November
24th (24/11/15).
During that address
Celik spoke proudly of how the STB had machine gunned the Su-24 crew as they
had parachuted to earth. In doing so Celik declared to the World that he is a
war criminal and on December 23rd (23/12/15) Russia duly issued an international arrest warrant
to see Celik held accountable for his crimes.
However it turns out
that Celik had fled Rabia prior to the SPETSNAZ raid and was instead hiding
out in Istanbul, Turkey.
This was hugely embarrassing for Turkey because it
made clear to everyone that the "moderate Syrian opposition" which
Turkey speaks so fondly of are neither moderate nor Syrian. The fact that Celik
was not arrested the moment he entered Turkey also made quite clear that Turkey
is failing in its international obligations by continuing to shelter those who
have committed war crimes and crimes against humanity.
Perhaps most
importantly in the pseudo-macho culture Turkish President/Prime
Minister/Emperor Recep Tayyip Erdogan has cultivated it made quite clear that
Celik is a coward who ran away and hid when the big boys came knocking
Italy in particular
had a great deal of fun with this in the form of ongoing raids against
organised crime - the mafia - in it's country. In one particular incident the
supposedly all powerful leaders of one particular criminal group were found
hiding out in the woods like rats in a hole. I personally found their interest
in the Spanish wholesale market highly amusing.
It is of course Italy
who have been leading efforts to block this USD/E3bn ransom payment from the
European Union (EU) to Turkey over the refugees.
So on January 25th
(25/1/16) Italian student Giulio Regeni went missing in Cairo, Egypt. The 28
year old had been living in Egypt for the past four months as part of his
Cambridge, UK, University PHD thesis on the Egyptian Trade Union movement. Nine days
later Mr Regeni's body was discovered partially burnt and showing signs of
torture along with injuries suggesting he had been beaten to death.
It is well known that
Turkey has a sizable presence in Turkey that is working to violently overthrow
the Egyptian government under the "Rabia" banner as part of Erdogan's
efforts to re-establish the Ottoman Empire. One of their main tactics is to
undermine the Egyptian state by accusing the police of brutality. Quite how -
as a Druze woman - George Clooney's wife Amal Alamuddin can continue to work in
support of these Sunni-extremists is completely beyond me.
As such I think it is
quite clear to all that Turkey had Giulio Regeni murdered as punishment for
Italy's blocking of this E3bn ransom payment. The killing would then be blamed
on the Egyptian police further weakening the Egyptian state and furthering
Turkey's cause.
Unfortunately certain
sections of the UK media - particularly Sky News - have fallen for this hook,
line and sinker. Surely it can't be long before former Al Jazeera reporter
Sherine Tadros' career in the UK media comes to an end. After all despite all
her claims of in depth knowledge of Egyptian politics she completly missed the
arrest on January 30th (30/1/16) of a Turkish police officer assigned to the Turkish Consulate who had been
carrying out hostile reconnaissance of the security measures to protect tourists
at the Giza Pyramids.
Obviously with diplomatic immunity eventually being invoked the details of this have been quietend somewhat.
On February 3rd
(3/2/16) the SAA were finally able to liberate the villages of Nubul and
Zaharaa ending a three year long siege. These sit some 15km (9 miles)
north-west of Aleppo City. Their liberation leaves the occupied Aleppo City
surrounded on three sides and places SAA troops around 30km (18 miles) from the
border with Turkey.
This development
simply added to Turkey's fury. Certainly since August 8th 2015 (8/8/15) Turkey has insisted
that ISIL must be left in control of a section of it's border stretching some
100km (60 miles) from the Euphrates River in the east to roughly the border
town of Kilis in the west. Containing the town of Marea this area of ISIL
control has become known as "Erdogan's pocket."
Initially the purpose
of establishing Erdogan's pocket was to provide a pre-text for a full-scale
Turkish ground invasion of Syria. The purpose of this invasion was to
strengthen ISIL's under pressure supply lines and to overthrow the main
anti-ISIL force - the Syrian government.
It seems that Erdogan
has still not received a firm and non-negotiable "No" to this plan.
However in the meantime he seems happy to keep his pocket open to guarantee at
least a limited supply line between Turkey and Raqqa - ISIL's de facto capital
in Syria.
The liberation of
Nubul and Zaharaa obviously leaves the SAA poised to move in an seal Erdogan's
pocket cutting what is left of ISIL's supply lines. So in response Turkey's
propaganda machine has gone into overdrive throwing out wild claim after wild
claim the hope of halting the SAA's advance.
So apparently the SPETSNAZ team dedicated to the capture of Alparslan Celik is now
an "Anti-Sunni Death Squad" while Celik's return to his native Turkey
is now apparently "Ethnic Cleansing."
The main effort
though is the roughly 70,000 civilians who have fled north from the line of
conflict into Erdogan's pocket. This is entirely a problem of Erdogan's
creation.
Throughout the past
five years Turkey has pumped out relentless anti-Shia propaganda. This has all
been focused on telling the Syria people that they are engaged in the sectarian
war to end all wars and the evil Shias of the Syrian government will murder
them in their beds in they get the chance. Although entirely false governments
and the media in the west have seen fit to recite these lies as fact rather
than exposing them for what they are.
To the west of
Erdogan's pocket you have the Kurdish Peoples Protection Units (YPG) operating
in what they term the "Afrin Canton." To the east of Erdogan's
pocket - across the Euphrates - you have the mixed forces of the Syrian
Democratic Forces (SDF/QSD).
In war Internally Displaced People (IDP's) tend to
flee away from the line of conflict no matter how jagged that is. If the YPG
and the QSD moved in from the west and east in a pincer movement to the north
then the IDP's would flee the line by heading south. This would put them in
territory controlled by the Syrian government where they would discover that
all the Turkish lies about the Syrian government are just that. Lies.
However Turkey has
remained adamant that neither the YPG nor the QSD can move into remove ISIL
from Erdogan's pocket. As such the only option remaining is for the SAA to
advance from the south driving the IDP's north.
Not only is it
entirely of Erdogan's creation this new IDP crisis seems to be of his design.
There is significant concern that he will attempt to use it as the pre-text for
the invasion of Syria. Turkey already seems to be involved in a sort of soft
invasion under the pretence of sending humanitarian supplies to the IDP's.
So it raised many an
eyebrow when on February 9th (9/2/16) German Chancellor/Head of Government
Angela Merkel once again travelled to Turkey in order to indulge Erdogan's
every whim lest he tells the world that she made another little girl cry.
As such that day's
crash between two trains just outside the city of Munich in the German state of
Bavaria should hardly have come as a surprise. In case you haven't worked it
out by now one of the trains represented Turkey's desire to flood the EU with
irregular migrants - I suspect Erdogan's focus is on terrorists rather than
refugees. The other train represented the backlash for any right thinking
person in Europe. The signal operator who is under investigation for making the mistake that caused the crash is of
course Angela Merkel.
The death toll of 11
wasn't actually that bad in comparison. Erdogan drowns that many in the Aegean
every day.
Demonstrating that
Angela Merkel now speaks for no-one but Angela Merkel on Thursday (11/2/16) the
North Atlantic Treaty Organisation (NATO) announced that it was deploying a
unified task force to the Aegean Sea. At the moment that task force's mission is
to gather intelligence on the routes used to smuggle irregular migrants through
Turkey into the EU. However if Turkey fails to act on that intelligence I can
see it being turned into a blockade to stop Erdogan's train in its tracks
preventing any future collisions.
Elsewhere everyone
has really been focused on 'forgetting' to return emails about the YPG
advancing out of the Afrin Canton with Russian air-support. On Thursday
(11/2/16) the YPG had succeeded in liberating the Menagh airbase from groups
allied to ISIL. This sits roughly 15km (8 miles) south of Syria's border with Turkey roughly 40km (24 miles) north of Aleppo City.
Meanwhile the US and
France as part of Combined Joint Task Force: Operation Inherent Resolve
(CJTFOIR) - the US-led coalition - have been busy bombing ISIL positions around
the town of Manbij. This sits on the western bank of the Euphrates just beyond
the Tishan Dam that the QSD liberated on December 26th (26/12/15). Since then Turkey's big
concern is that the QSD will advance on Manbij and remove ISIL from Erdogan's
pocket.
I'm not saying that this bombing of Manbij is definitely CJTFOIR giving
permission for the QSD operation to proceed. However if the QSD were to advance
they would certainly find that the target has been softened up for them.
As such former French
Foreign Minister's Laurent Fabius' curious pro-Turkish leaving comments struck
me as the parting shots of a man whose been told that he doesn't need to work
out his notice period after all.
Things got really
interesting though on Wednesday (10/2/16) when US jets took off from United
States Air Force (USAF) base Incirilk in Turkey. They proceeded to fly to Aleppo
City and bomb targets being occupied by what Turkey terms the 'moderate
opposition.' The Americans then immediately put out a statement claiming that
two hospitals had been destroyed in strikes they blamed on the Russians.
However the next day
CJTFOIR published their daily strike update. This edition was adorned with a
photograph of the aircraft that carried out the Aleppo City strikes. Inside it
made clear that CJTFOIR would be making no apologies for the strikes on Manbij.
Then on Thursday
(11/2/16) evening someone thought it would be a good idea to hold a meeting of
the poorly named International Syria Support Group (ISSG). Better referred to as
the "Illegal Sunnistan Syria Group" the ISSG is an international group dedicated
to the overthrow of the Syrian government. As this aim runs contrary to the
charter of the United Nations (UN) I do not understand how it can, in any way,
be endorsed by the UN or attended by any UN member state.
However it seems that
some people enjoyed World War One and World War Two so much they just can't
wait to start World War Three.
In what I can only
assume was a psychotic episode in the stupidly early hours of Friday (12/2/16)
morning the ISSG announced that it had reached an agreement. As always with
these types of agreement exactly what was agreed is certainly open to
interpretation.
For example you could
interpret the agreement to mean that Russia and the Syrian government have
decided to surrender and preserve ISIL's presence in the country for all
eternity.
Alternatively you
could interpret it to mean that the US has given itself a timetable of 7 days
to end all pro-ISIL sanctions against Russia and formally designate Turkey as a
state sponsor of terrorism. Thus ending its membership of NATO.
Assuming it was the
former Islamist terrorists decided to celebrate by attacking a UN base near Kidal in Mali. Five UN staff members were killed in this attack.
However after having
it explained to them that it was more of the latter the US then started to
panic a bit with the shooting of two schoolgirls at the Independence High
School in Arizona. The two girls represent the female fighters of the YPG to
the west of Erdogan's pocket and the female fighters of the QSD to the east of
Erdogan's pocket. The announcement that it was an "isolated incident"
was intended to reassure Erdogan that the two girls would not be meeting at
independence.
Emboldened by this on Saturday (13/2/16) Turkey started shelling YPG positions in Syria. The purpose of this barrage was to stop the YPG liberating the road that runs between the towns of Azaz and Tell Rifat which sits around 2km (1.2 miles) east of the Menagh airbase.
Both Azaz and Tell Rifat are currently under the occupation of Al Nusra Front (ANF) - Al Qaeda's affiliate in Syria. Therefore Turkey's actions can only be viewed as an unprovoked act of war against Syria and it's allies in direct support of an internationally recognised terrorist group.
Curiously the US - through Vice President Joe Biden - opted not to condemn Turkey's actions in support of a declared enemy of the US. Instead they merely urged Turkey to try and show restraint. Perhaps more shockingly the US went on to actively discourage the YPG from liberating any more territory for Al Qaeda.
Needless to say Turkey was further emboldened by these comments and continued to shell the YPG today. The Turks say that they've killed 32 YPG fighters while the YPG claim that only 2 have fallen. Either way it's been a bit nasty.
While all this was going on the US was ruining it all by trying to force everyone to air their dirty laundry in public at the
Munich Security Conference. This of course is the type of sounding out that
should have occurred in the corridors of the closed NATO Summit that should have
taken place immediately after the November 13th (13/11/15) Paris Massacres.
After all I gather the Munich Security Conference is only attended by the sort of podgy right-wing loons who get all sweaty in the palms at the mere mention of a little bit of military action.
Apart from that
though I think it went well. After all US President Barack Obama never fails.
He's Awesome.
Thursday, 11 February 2016
COP21 Terrorism Update #21
As the investigation has progressed under US & EU supervision a clearer picture has begun to emerge of the bombing of Daallo Airlines flight DAO 159 over Mogadishu, Somalia on February 2nd (2/2/16).
It now seems to be an exact carbon copy of the October 31st (31/10/16) bombing of Kogalymavia Airlines flight 7K9268 over Egypt in every way except for the death toll.
It appears that the bomb was smuggled through what little security there is at Mogadishu airport by a member of staff. It was then handed to the passenger who took it aboard only to be killed in the explosion. The main point of focus in the 7K9268 investigation is an airline mechanic who is suspected of smuggling the bomb aboard the flight under duress from persons unknown.
The bomb itself appears to have been hidden inside a laptop computer. Already containing the power supply, electronics and even the timer needed to detonate a bomb laptops have long been recognised as a convenient way to smuggle small bombs aboard aircraft. After all the explosive charge can be hidden in the X-ray voids such as the hard-disc or battery.
However as I've mentioned the big movie at the 2016 Oscars is "The Revenant." This is supposed to serve as a metaphor for the journey towards COP21 and finally win an Oscar for Leonardo DiCaprio who has been heavily involved in efforts to combat climate change for a number of years. I've also made clear that I'm in the process of writing up a full analysis of the the Oscars on an offline laptop computer that I will not publish until after the ceremony.
As I've said numerous times there is probably nothing worse than telling a bunch of spies that you know a secret. But you're not going to tell them what it is.
It has also emerged that DAO 159 was not the scheduled target. Apparently the passengers had brought tickets with Turkish Airlines only for the Turkish Airlines aircraft not to turn up. At the last minute Daallo Airlines stepped into take over the route.
With the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) claiming responsibility for 7K9268 Turkey has in turn being held responsible for the bombing because of its support for ISIL.
The purpose of the bombing of DAO 159 was always to cast doubt on ISIL's claim of responsibility for 7K9268 and suggest that a nation state had been responsible. Staging an ineffective bombing on a Turkish Airlines aircraft would certainly have served that purpose. However the fact that Turkey knew enough for their aircraft not to turn up certainly suggests they're in contact with those responsible for the bombing.
At the time I went on record blaming Saudi Arabia for the bombing of 7K9268. I'm not sure why I've suddenly become so coy.
Away from events in Somalia in the last couple of days there have been some big developments to do with the COP21 draft agreement itself.
The first of these is that on Tuesday (9/2/16) the Supreme Court of the United States (SCOTUS) issued a temporary injunction preventing the Intended Nationally Determined Contribution (INDC) going into force. This is not the same as saying the US won't be meeting its obligations but it certainly won't be doing so until SCOTUS has issued a final ruling on the legality of the proposal.
This has come as a surprise to absolutely no-one. In fact I used it to highlight why the 5-year commitment cycles are simply unworkable in my December 12th (12/12/16) post; http://watchitdie.blogspot.co.uk/2015/12/cop21-wow-what-press-conference.html
The other big development is that yesterday (10/2/16) COP21 President Laurent Fabius resigned from his main job as France's Foreign Minister. Even before COP21 we knew that Fabius' term was ending and he would be leaving the post. However he seems to have been forced out a little bit earlier then expected. For example his parting shots on ISIL seemed somewhat inconsistent with French policy for reasons I shouldn't even hint at without putting in their proper context.
Throughout I've been saying that the big problem with COP21 has been US President Barack Obama's desire to force through any old agreement to secure his legacy rather then producing an agreement that actually works. The same problem has also applied to Fabius. Apparently he also wanted to secure a peace deal between Israel and Palestine before leaving office.
Obviously now Fabius has left office it has become a lot easier to consign his legacy to the litter - er, sorry recycling - bin.
So overnight US Federal authorities have moved into to arrest the final four members of the occupation of the Malheur Wildlife Reserve in Oregon. This of course was the US comprehensive contribution to the post-COP21 debate. The main point it seemed to raise was that by getting bogged down in the argument over REDD+ and the associated argument over indigenous rights both the US and Brazil had managed to lose sight of the wider objective.
However after the initial couple of days of excitement the "Oregon Occupation" as it was dubbed just sort of sat there not doing very much.
As such it really became a debate about when the campaign to have the COP21 draft adopted would end. This element really began on January 20th (20/1/16) with Oregon Governor Kate Brown demanding that Obama took action to end the "Spectacle of Lawlessness." It escalated further with the arrest of 8 and the killing of 1 of the protesters on January 26th (26/1/16) while US Secretary of State John Kerry was visiting China.
After last night's developments the general tone I'm getting out of the US is that it is definitely going to end soon.
France obviously tried to include itself in the discussion with the crash of a school bus into a truck in Rochefort, south-west France that killed six.
As I mentioned in discussing The Revenant it is heavily inspired by a French TV show called "Les Revenants" that begins with children killed in a school bus crash returning as zombies. As I also mentioned this became something of a big issue across South America throughout 2015 with the Temple of Santiago Church being revealed by receding reservoir water in Mexico and the Bento Rodrigues dam collapse in Brazil.
What I forgot to mention though was that France also made reference to this with the death of 45 pensioners where their bus collided with a truck near Puisseguin on October 23rd (23/10/15). Puisseguin is around 125km (75 miles) south-east of Rochefort.
In talking about The Revenant I expressed concern that perhaps my failure to address Les Revenants might have contributed to the failure of COP21. However I remain adamant that was not such a significant factor as Obama's decision to swoop in and tear up the agreement everyone had been working on for five in order to replace it with essentially blank pages.
On Tuesday (9/2/16) twin suicide bombers struck the Dika camp for Internally Displaced People (IDP's) in Nigeria's north-west Borno state which has long been plagued by the Islamist terrorism of Boko Haram.
As I said during COP21 I view Nigeria and the neighbouring states such as Cameroon as active war-zones alongside Syria and Iraq. Therefore bomb attacks occur with such frequency that it is impossible for me to comment on every one. However with 56 killed this seems to have been a particularly nasty one. The fact that an IDP camp was targeted seems to be a reference to the situation on the Syria/Turkey border. I will have to deal with that separately.
Today 6 people have been shot and killed at Education Department offices in Saudi Arabia's south-western Jazan Province.
The targeting of an educational facility seems intended to invoke memories of both the December 16th 2014 (16/12/14) attack on a school in Peshawar, Pakistan and the April 2nd 2015 (2/4/15) attack on Garissa University in Kenya. The fact that Jazan sits on Saudi Arabia's border with Yemen seems intended as a reminder to east/central African nations of the threat that lurks just across the Gulf of Aden.
So it seems that while nations such as the US are casting doubt on the COP21 draft agreement ever being ratified Saudi Arabia is upping its intimidation of the poorer nations in the hope of forcing it through.
18:35 on 11/2/16 (UK date).
It now seems to be an exact carbon copy of the October 31st (31/10/16) bombing of Kogalymavia Airlines flight 7K9268 over Egypt in every way except for the death toll.
It appears that the bomb was smuggled through what little security there is at Mogadishu airport by a member of staff. It was then handed to the passenger who took it aboard only to be killed in the explosion. The main point of focus in the 7K9268 investigation is an airline mechanic who is suspected of smuggling the bomb aboard the flight under duress from persons unknown.
The bomb itself appears to have been hidden inside a laptop computer. Already containing the power supply, electronics and even the timer needed to detonate a bomb laptops have long been recognised as a convenient way to smuggle small bombs aboard aircraft. After all the explosive charge can be hidden in the X-ray voids such as the hard-disc or battery.
However as I've mentioned the big movie at the 2016 Oscars is "The Revenant." This is supposed to serve as a metaphor for the journey towards COP21 and finally win an Oscar for Leonardo DiCaprio who has been heavily involved in efforts to combat climate change for a number of years. I've also made clear that I'm in the process of writing up a full analysis of the the Oscars on an offline laptop computer that I will not publish until after the ceremony.
As I've said numerous times there is probably nothing worse than telling a bunch of spies that you know a secret. But you're not going to tell them what it is.
It has also emerged that DAO 159 was not the scheduled target. Apparently the passengers had brought tickets with Turkish Airlines only for the Turkish Airlines aircraft not to turn up. At the last minute Daallo Airlines stepped into take over the route.
With the Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIL) claiming responsibility for 7K9268 Turkey has in turn being held responsible for the bombing because of its support for ISIL.
The purpose of the bombing of DAO 159 was always to cast doubt on ISIL's claim of responsibility for 7K9268 and suggest that a nation state had been responsible. Staging an ineffective bombing on a Turkish Airlines aircraft would certainly have served that purpose. However the fact that Turkey knew enough for their aircraft not to turn up certainly suggests they're in contact with those responsible for the bombing.
At the time I went on record blaming Saudi Arabia for the bombing of 7K9268. I'm not sure why I've suddenly become so coy.
Away from events in Somalia in the last couple of days there have been some big developments to do with the COP21 draft agreement itself.
The first of these is that on Tuesday (9/2/16) the Supreme Court of the United States (SCOTUS) issued a temporary injunction preventing the Intended Nationally Determined Contribution (INDC) going into force. This is not the same as saying the US won't be meeting its obligations but it certainly won't be doing so until SCOTUS has issued a final ruling on the legality of the proposal.
This has come as a surprise to absolutely no-one. In fact I used it to highlight why the 5-year commitment cycles are simply unworkable in my December 12th (12/12/16) post; http://watchitdie.blogspot.co.uk/2015/12/cop21-wow-what-press-conference.html
The other big development is that yesterday (10/2/16) COP21 President Laurent Fabius resigned from his main job as France's Foreign Minister. Even before COP21 we knew that Fabius' term was ending and he would be leaving the post. However he seems to have been forced out a little bit earlier then expected. For example his parting shots on ISIL seemed somewhat inconsistent with French policy for reasons I shouldn't even hint at without putting in their proper context.
Throughout I've been saying that the big problem with COP21 has been US President Barack Obama's desire to force through any old agreement to secure his legacy rather then producing an agreement that actually works. The same problem has also applied to Fabius. Apparently he also wanted to secure a peace deal between Israel and Palestine before leaving office.
Obviously now Fabius has left office it has become a lot easier to consign his legacy to the litter - er, sorry recycling - bin.
So overnight US Federal authorities have moved into to arrest the final four members of the occupation of the Malheur Wildlife Reserve in Oregon. This of course was the US comprehensive contribution to the post-COP21 debate. The main point it seemed to raise was that by getting bogged down in the argument over REDD+ and the associated argument over indigenous rights both the US and Brazil had managed to lose sight of the wider objective.
However after the initial couple of days of excitement the "Oregon Occupation" as it was dubbed just sort of sat there not doing very much.
As such it really became a debate about when the campaign to have the COP21 draft adopted would end. This element really began on January 20th (20/1/16) with Oregon Governor Kate Brown demanding that Obama took action to end the "Spectacle of Lawlessness." It escalated further with the arrest of 8 and the killing of 1 of the protesters on January 26th (26/1/16) while US Secretary of State John Kerry was visiting China.
After last night's developments the general tone I'm getting out of the US is that it is definitely going to end soon.
France obviously tried to include itself in the discussion with the crash of a school bus into a truck in Rochefort, south-west France that killed six.
As I mentioned in discussing The Revenant it is heavily inspired by a French TV show called "Les Revenants" that begins with children killed in a school bus crash returning as zombies. As I also mentioned this became something of a big issue across South America throughout 2015 with the Temple of Santiago Church being revealed by receding reservoir water in Mexico and the Bento Rodrigues dam collapse in Brazil.
What I forgot to mention though was that France also made reference to this with the death of 45 pensioners where their bus collided with a truck near Puisseguin on October 23rd (23/10/15). Puisseguin is around 125km (75 miles) south-east of Rochefort.
In talking about The Revenant I expressed concern that perhaps my failure to address Les Revenants might have contributed to the failure of COP21. However I remain adamant that was not such a significant factor as Obama's decision to swoop in and tear up the agreement everyone had been working on for five in order to replace it with essentially blank pages.
On Tuesday (9/2/16) twin suicide bombers struck the Dika camp for Internally Displaced People (IDP's) in Nigeria's north-west Borno state which has long been plagued by the Islamist terrorism of Boko Haram.
As I said during COP21 I view Nigeria and the neighbouring states such as Cameroon as active war-zones alongside Syria and Iraq. Therefore bomb attacks occur with such frequency that it is impossible for me to comment on every one. However with 56 killed this seems to have been a particularly nasty one. The fact that an IDP camp was targeted seems to be a reference to the situation on the Syria/Turkey border. I will have to deal with that separately.
Today 6 people have been shot and killed at Education Department offices in Saudi Arabia's south-western Jazan Province.
The targeting of an educational facility seems intended to invoke memories of both the December 16th 2014 (16/12/14) attack on a school in Peshawar, Pakistan and the April 2nd 2015 (2/4/15) attack on Garissa University in Kenya. The fact that Jazan sits on Saudi Arabia's border with Yemen seems intended as a reminder to east/central African nations of the threat that lurks just across the Gulf of Aden.
So it seems that while nations such as the US are casting doubt on the COP21 draft agreement ever being ratified Saudi Arabia is upping its intimidation of the poorer nations in the hope of forcing it through.
18:35 on 11/2/16 (UK date).
So Jeremy Hunt's Resigning.
Britain's National Health Service (NHS) has long suffered from this problem that patients are more likely to die if they're admitted to hospital on the weekend.
There are a number of reasons for this. For example weekend admissions tend to be absolute emergencies. Therefore a patients chances of survival have already dropped dramatically long before they even arrive at hospital. However a significant part of the problem is that senior doctors such as consultants tend not to work on weekends.
Under the banner of the "Seven Day NHS" the UK Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has decided to exploit this problem by using it to impose a 30% pay cut on junior doctors.
Hardly being militant trade unionists the junior doctors have actually been extremely reasonable in the negotiations over these new contracts. For example they recently tabled a proposal that sticks within the governments budget with a 20% pay-cut. However they want to hold onto the concession that Saturdays are considered unsociable hours and therefore paid at a premium as they are for senior doctors.
After all if it costs a hospital more to have two junior doctors work on a Saturday then it does to have a senior doctor work they're going to get the senior doctor to work.
Obviously though conceding that junior doctors already work on weekends would also force Jeremy Hunt to admit that his slogan of the "Seven Day NHS" is simply a scam to slash everyone's pay. So Jeremy Hunt and the government have effectively gone into hiding refusing to meet with either the junior doctors or the media.
Today Hunt is predicted to announce that the government will simply impose the new contracts on the junior doctors without negotiation. This is likely to result in many junior doctors simply refusing to sign that new contract and instead going off to work in either private practice, the European Union (EU) or even as far afield as Dubai. This will leave the NHS without doctors.
So surely long before Jeremy Hunt makes his big announcement he's going to be sacked for gross incompetence.
11:40 on 11/2/16 (UK date).
There are a number of reasons for this. For example weekend admissions tend to be absolute emergencies. Therefore a patients chances of survival have already dropped dramatically long before they even arrive at hospital. However a significant part of the problem is that senior doctors such as consultants tend not to work on weekends.
Under the banner of the "Seven Day NHS" the UK Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt has decided to exploit this problem by using it to impose a 30% pay cut on junior doctors.
Hardly being militant trade unionists the junior doctors have actually been extremely reasonable in the negotiations over these new contracts. For example they recently tabled a proposal that sticks within the governments budget with a 20% pay-cut. However they want to hold onto the concession that Saturdays are considered unsociable hours and therefore paid at a premium as they are for senior doctors.
After all if it costs a hospital more to have two junior doctors work on a Saturday then it does to have a senior doctor work they're going to get the senior doctor to work.
Obviously though conceding that junior doctors already work on weekends would also force Jeremy Hunt to admit that his slogan of the "Seven Day NHS" is simply a scam to slash everyone's pay. So Jeremy Hunt and the government have effectively gone into hiding refusing to meet with either the junior doctors or the media.
Today Hunt is predicted to announce that the government will simply impose the new contracts on the junior doctors without negotiation. This is likely to result in many junior doctors simply refusing to sign that new contract and instead going off to work in either private practice, the European Union (EU) or even as far afield as Dubai. This will leave the NHS without doctors.
So surely long before Jeremy Hunt makes his big announcement he's going to be sacked for gross incompetence.
11:40 on 11/2/16 (UK date).
Wednesday, 10 February 2016
Grubby Marks.
If as you go about your day today you see people wandering around with soot smeared on their faces try not to panic. They haven't just been in a fire. It's part of a Christian rite that marks the start of Lent - the month that leads up to the most important Christian festival - Easter.
As with Ramadan in Islam Lent is all about sacrifice and spiritual renewal. However whereas in Ramadan you fast for dawn until dusk in Lent you identify a single vice and then abstain from it all day, every day for 40 days. For children this often means sweets which is what makes the chocolate Easter eggs and the end so amazing. For adults though - particularly Irish ones - it tends to mean alcohol.
So you can imagine my sarcasm when, at the start of 2016, the UK's cancer charities announced that they'd had this revolutionary new idea. Everyone could give up alcohol for the 31 days of January for what was dubbed "Dry January."
As apparently you can't so "No" to cancer charities. Nor impose a levy on them to compensate the National Health Service (NHS) for their nonsense this became almost compulsory. The UK's "E4" TV network even put on a special season of programs to promote the idea and support people throughout the month.
I of course spent the month drinking heavily and trying to suppress the urge to point out to them that perhaps there's a reason why Lent doesn't take place during the most depressing month of the year.
15:50 on 10/2/16 (UK date).
As with Ramadan in Islam Lent is all about sacrifice and spiritual renewal. However whereas in Ramadan you fast for dawn until dusk in Lent you identify a single vice and then abstain from it all day, every day for 40 days. For children this often means sweets which is what makes the chocolate Easter eggs and the end so amazing. For adults though - particularly Irish ones - it tends to mean alcohol.
So you can imagine my sarcasm when, at the start of 2016, the UK's cancer charities announced that they'd had this revolutionary new idea. Everyone could give up alcohol for the 31 days of January for what was dubbed "Dry January."
As apparently you can't so "No" to cancer charities. Nor impose a levy on them to compensate the National Health Service (NHS) for their nonsense this became almost compulsory. The UK's "E4" TV network even put on a special season of programs to promote the idea and support people throughout the month.
I of course spent the month drinking heavily and trying to suppress the urge to point out to them that perhaps there's a reason why Lent doesn't take place during the most depressing month of the year.
15:50 on 10/2/16 (UK date).
Monday, 8 February 2016
Super Bowl 50.
The main theme of last night's Super Bowl was the way that US President Barack Obama has seemingly taken the nation to the brink of civil war through his divisive, racial politics.
The Black Lives Matter (BLM) were represented by the Carolina Panthers while white America was represented by the Denver Broncos.
Although I'm really not qualified to comment I think that on paper the Panthers were considered the stronger team. Therefore it would have been extremely easy for the NFL to try and recruit a whole legion of new fans from within the ranks of BLM by endorsing their point of view by handing the Panthers a resounding victory. After all most white football fans would simply put it down to the result following the form.
Therefore the result was something of a surprise. Due to a problem with the UK scheduling I missed the entire first quarter and the start of the second quarter. However from the bits that I need see at no point were the Panthers in the lead nor ever looked like winning.
As such the game and the Broncos eventual 24-10 victory was a big victory for white America and a huge snub to BLM. It was also a huge victory for the Broncos star quarter-back Peyton Manning who is nicknamed "The Sheriff" and has recently been subjected to some baseless smears by the Al Jazeera America news network who were big supporters of BLM.
I thought this was rather brave of the NFL because it is easy to be popular. However for their own good sometimes you have to tell people things they don't want to hear.
The Half-Time Show: I think I largely covered this yesterday.
The show was headlined by Coldplay. Their stage decoration was heavily inspired by the hippyish "Flower Power" iconography that California's San Francisco - where the Super Bowl took place - was famous for in the 1960's. This movement was heavily inspired by the mysticism of Hinduism and Buddhism from India. Therefore it is an example of the cultural appropriation that the video for Coldplay's latest single "Hymn For the Weekend" has been accused of.
Although their costumes and their props were all references to Flower Power some of the dancers looked to me as if they were participating in a Mardi Gras type carnival such as the one that is currently going on in Brazil.
Part of the reason why Coldplay annoy me is that they headlined the closing ceremony of the 2012 Summer Olympics in London, UK. This saw Rihanna being handed to me ahead of her 2013 Diamonds World Tour. As such I think it's clear that Coldplay hate me.
This summer will see the 2016 Summer Olympics take place in Rio de Janerio, Brazil. Coldplay and Rihanna will be part of the Olympic legacy that is passed from Britain to Brazil. So I for one would have really preferred it if Rihanna had released what is effectively her comeback album last year rather than last week.
In an effort to lighten the mood Coldplay were joined on stage by Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson to perform "Uptown Funk." This was one of the huge songs of 2014/15 and is frequently used to get the party started by getting everyone up and dancing.
Then away from the main stage Beyonce did her performance of "Formation" which is sort of the anthem of support for BLM that she released on Saturday (6/2/16). The context I took away was that Beyonce and BLM were separate and therefore a bit weird.
After doing her little bit Beyonce joined Coldplay, Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson on the main stage. Beyonce of course performed during the 2013 Super Bowl half-time show while Bruno Mars performed at half-time in 2014. So having them both on stage together hinted at a bit of a retrospective of Super Bowl history in its 50th year.
The show then decided to do an actual retrospective montage featuring all the acts who'd appeared over the years while this year's performers did a medley of their songs.
It is of course subjective but I think lent heavily on Micheal Jackson's 1993 half-time performance at Super Bowl 27. Both Beyonce and Bruno Mars' costumes featuring black and gold seemed to be little tributes to Micheal Jackson with Mars' costume in particular having a distinctly 1990's feel to it.
In the 1980's Micheal Jackson was one of the first solo black male performers to break through into the mainstream. As a result he continues to be idolised by many black Americans. However Micheal Jackson was also a drug addicted paedophile who was the product of an extremely violent childhood. As such I'm certain that Micheal Jackson is not a man I would want my kids to grow up to be like.
I think the montage also lingered on Whitney Houston's 1991 performance at Super Bowl 25. Again Whitney Houston is considered an iconic trail-blazer by many black Americas. However she also had a massive drug problem and was almost destroyed by a domestically violent relationship with Bobby Brown. The day before last year's Super Bowl their daughter Bobbi Christina Brown at the age of 21 amid the same rumours of drug abuse and domestic violence.
As such the half-time show posed questions about the type of role models black America chooses and whether it is that rather than racism that is holding them back.
To avoid sticking the knife in too far the show ended with literally everyone involved - apparently even Coldplay's taxi driver was included - all standing together holding hands and linking arms on stage. This was a show of and a plea for unity over division.
I have to say though that my main impression of the half-time show though was that it just wasn't as spectacular as previous years.
The reason for this is that the really spectacular shows rely heavily on lighting effects, pyrotechnics etc. For those to work you need darkness. With this year's Super Bowl being all the way out in San Francisco the half-time show actually took place in mid-late afternoon rather than early evening. This meant that the famous California sunshine was still in full effect.
California is famously the US state without an American Football team although I think this year there are plans to bring the Saint Louis Rams to Los Angeles. This somewhat flat half-time show rather poses of the question of whether California is just cut out for American Football?
Explaining my behaviour rather than the show itself I should point out that in the UK there is this nursery rhyme called "Nellie the Elephant."
Essentially this is just a silly song to amuse very young children. However it's about an Elephant who runs away from the circus and travels to Hindustan - an colonial era name for India - and Mandalay which technically is in Burma/Myanmar but is often used to refer to some mythical place in the Chinese far east.
Although I couldn't find it on Youtube in one version a Monkey tries riding on the Elephant's back but falls off, sliding down her trunk. This version ends with essentially the chant of; "What became of the Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, Monkey."
I've had that song stuck in my head ever since I've realised what the Super Bowl was trying to do in terms of using India to put pressure on China while they were celebrating the start of the Year of the Monkey.
At 15:45 on 8/2/16 (UK date) I'll be back to make a start on the commercials.
Edited at around 16:30 on 8/2/16 (UK date) to add;
The Commercials: With it being such a provocative year I wouldn't have been at all surprised if many advertisers chose to stay away. Their absence itself would make a statement about all the division being bad for business.
I have to say though that this year Budweiser absolutely nailed it.
Their main commercial featured British actress Helen Mirren in what was essentially a public service announcement urging people not to drink and drive.
One of BLM's big cause celeb of 2015 was Sandra Bland who committed suicide after being arrested for Driving Under the Influence (DUI) of alcohol/drugs. BLM argued that this offence wasn't serious enough to justify the arrest.
On December 20th 2015 (20/12/15) a woman crashed her car into a crowd outside a hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada killing one and injuring 36. This highlighted to BLM the very serious effects that DUI can have. Budweiser have obviously chosen to reinforce that message.
Helen Mirren played the Queen of England in the 2006 movie "The Queen." Therefore having her telling off Americans off for being so stupid is a reference to how throughout 2015 many nations - led by the UK - queued up to tell Obama to stop being so stupid and end the BLM campaign.
At the end Ms Mirren tells Americans to stop being a "pillock." This is a minor British swear word that Americans might not be familiar with. Literally translated it means "penis" however it's used in the same context you would use "dick." As in; "Stop being a dick."
While I'm on the topic of teaching Americans to swear more effectively I should point out that the word "Twat" is pronounced "Tw-At" not "Twot." There is neither an "O" nor a "H" in there. Except when I'm involved ; )
The commercial for Budweiser's "Bud-Light" brand featured comedians Seth Rogen and Amy Schumer as political candidates for the Bud-Light Party. Their message was that rather than focusing on the things that divide them Americans should concentrate of the things that unite them - such as Paul Rudd and Bud-Light.
Featuring bawdy jokes about things like checking out the size of some-ones 'Caucus' this was intended as an antidote to all the endless election campaigning. However with Bud-Light's branding sharing the blue of the Democrat Party it seemed to be having a specific dig at Obama and the Democrats.
What is also interesting is that Seth Rogan is actually Canadian. Part of the UK Commonwealth Realm Canada was among that long queue of nations lining up to tell Obama to stop being a pillock.
Back in October 2015 Amy Schumer teamed up with her cousin - Democrat Senator Chuck Schumer - to campaign for more gun control on Obama's behalf. This led to a rather unfortunate photograph doing the rounds after this year's Golden Globe awards which showed anti-gun campaigner Amy Schumer being guarded by lots of men with guns. She may have opted to do this commerical to apologise for the gun control campaign.
With it being such a provocative and controversial year many brands seem to have steered into the skid as it were and gone for shock-value.
Doritos: Their most talked about commercial this year features a heavily pregnant woman having an ultrasound. Because they're so delicious the woman's husband - they're both clearly wearing wedding rings - can't stop eating Doritos even during this medical procedure. As a joke he offers the unborn baby some Doritos.
They then notice on the ultrasound screen that the baby is actually reaching for the Doritos. So the father tries to see if he can get the baby to move about by sort of playing keep-away with the Doritos. The woman snatches it out his hands and throws the Dorito across the room.
At this point the baby chases the Dorito by escaping the woman's vagina at great speed. That made even me wince.
Although I can't be sure I think the pregnant woman is played by an actress called Christine Woods and if not she certainly resembles her.
Ms Woods is probably most famous for playing an FBI agent in the 2009/10 TV show "Flashforward" in which everyone keeps having blackouts - the loss of consciousness rather than the BLM campaign tactic. Despite being gay during her blackouts Ms Wood's character keeps having visions of herself pregnant and having an ultrasound scan.
I remain convinced that Christine Woods was cast in Flashforward because she resembles Robin Tunney who up until recently starred in "The Mentalist." When she's not in character Taryn Manning who plays Tiffany "Pennsatucky" Doggett in "Orange is the New Black" also resembles Robin Tunney. So much so that in the final season of The Mentalist they made a whole big joke out of it.
These are obviously the sort of in-jokes that I enjoy.
Mountain Dew: This starts with three young men sitting on the couch complaining they don't have the energy to go out partying. Then a trap door in the wall opens and the weirdest thing walks in carrying a bucket of Mountain Dew Kickstart which is essentially an energy drink.
Christened the "PuppyMonkeyBaby" this thing has the legs of a diaper wearing baby, the body of a monkey and the head of a Pug-like dog. It just repeats the words "Puppy, Monkey, Baby" over and over again in a hypnotic chant while shaking a maraca. At one point it licks one of the men on the face before leading all three men out of the apartment to what we assume is a party.
If you were sitting there watching that as either the parent of a new baby or the partner of woman who really wants a baby and perhaps has brought herself a little Pug-like dog to compensate I can imagine this commerical being extremely uncomfortable viewing.
The thing that really annoys me about the Super Bowl is that here in the UK we don't get any of the commercials. As it was broadcast on the BBC this year we didn't even get British commercials. This ends up meaning that I'm being forced to stay up until almost dawn and actually only getting to see about 40% of the spectacle.
I try and compensate by watching some of the commercials online when they get mentioned on Twitter. In reading up on the PuppyMonkeyBaby commerical I clicked on a dodgy link that downloaded a virus. This obviously spoilt the evening somewhat.
If this had happened on a PC or a device using the Android operating system I could have quite easily got into the code to identify this virus and the best way to remove it. However this happened on my Amazon tablet which uses a specially adapted version of Android which effectively prevents you from accessing the code.
This is a long-term irritation of mine because led by Apple as we move towards Smartphones and apps people don't really understand what they're doing and what their devices are doing anymore. My advice is to read the terms & conditions on apps very carefully before choosing to install them.
With the Super Bowl taking place close to Silicon Valley and Beyonce trying to use it as an opportunity to promote her "Tidal" app I suppose this could lead into a discussion about net neutrality and technology more generally.
However I'm pretty sure it was just me drunkenly pressing the wrong button and then throwing an absolutely massive tantrum.
Heinz: This features Dachshund puppies dressed in hot-dog costumes racing across a field towards humans wearing Heinz ketchup costumes.
The Super Bowl is accompanied by something called the "Puppy Bowl" where cute puppies try and play American Football. Also a lot of food gets eaten during the Super Bowl including America's favourite the hot-dog. Therefore this image of puppies dressed as hot-dogs is pretty common
However the scenery resembled that scene from the BBC show "War & Peace" that I mentioned yesterday which features a man's penis. The challenge for any US broadcaster showing that episode is to edit out the penis before the character starts talking. I suppose you could describe that as; "A Wiener Race."
The thing that's really annoyed me about Super Bowl this year is that it would actually be quite fun to spend a whole hungover day watching funny commercials on the Internet. It's also quite fun to spend a whole day writing about them.
However with the World being what it is at the moment I can't really justify doing that. If anything catches my eye I might be back to comment on it. I think though this abridged version is going to be it for this year.
18:10 on 8/2/15 (UK date).
The Black Lives Matter (BLM) were represented by the Carolina Panthers while white America was represented by the Denver Broncos.
Although I'm really not qualified to comment I think that on paper the Panthers were considered the stronger team. Therefore it would have been extremely easy for the NFL to try and recruit a whole legion of new fans from within the ranks of BLM by endorsing their point of view by handing the Panthers a resounding victory. After all most white football fans would simply put it down to the result following the form.
Therefore the result was something of a surprise. Due to a problem with the UK scheduling I missed the entire first quarter and the start of the second quarter. However from the bits that I need see at no point were the Panthers in the lead nor ever looked like winning.
As such the game and the Broncos eventual 24-10 victory was a big victory for white America and a huge snub to BLM. It was also a huge victory for the Broncos star quarter-back Peyton Manning who is nicknamed "The Sheriff" and has recently been subjected to some baseless smears by the Al Jazeera America news network who were big supporters of BLM.
I thought this was rather brave of the NFL because it is easy to be popular. However for their own good sometimes you have to tell people things they don't want to hear.
The Half-Time Show: I think I largely covered this yesterday.
The show was headlined by Coldplay. Their stage decoration was heavily inspired by the hippyish "Flower Power" iconography that California's San Francisco - where the Super Bowl took place - was famous for in the 1960's. This movement was heavily inspired by the mysticism of Hinduism and Buddhism from India. Therefore it is an example of the cultural appropriation that the video for Coldplay's latest single "Hymn For the Weekend" has been accused of.
Although their costumes and their props were all references to Flower Power some of the dancers looked to me as if they were participating in a Mardi Gras type carnival such as the one that is currently going on in Brazil.
Part of the reason why Coldplay annoy me is that they headlined the closing ceremony of the 2012 Summer Olympics in London, UK. This saw Rihanna being handed to me ahead of her 2013 Diamonds World Tour. As such I think it's clear that Coldplay hate me.
This summer will see the 2016 Summer Olympics take place in Rio de Janerio, Brazil. Coldplay and Rihanna will be part of the Olympic legacy that is passed from Britain to Brazil. So I for one would have really preferred it if Rihanna had released what is effectively her comeback album last year rather than last week.
In an effort to lighten the mood Coldplay were joined on stage by Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson to perform "Uptown Funk." This was one of the huge songs of 2014/15 and is frequently used to get the party started by getting everyone up and dancing.
Then away from the main stage Beyonce did her performance of "Formation" which is sort of the anthem of support for BLM that she released on Saturday (6/2/16). The context I took away was that Beyonce and BLM were separate and therefore a bit weird.
After doing her little bit Beyonce joined Coldplay, Bruno Mars and Mark Ronson on the main stage. Beyonce of course performed during the 2013 Super Bowl half-time show while Bruno Mars performed at half-time in 2014. So having them both on stage together hinted at a bit of a retrospective of Super Bowl history in its 50th year.
The show then decided to do an actual retrospective montage featuring all the acts who'd appeared over the years while this year's performers did a medley of their songs.
It is of course subjective but I think lent heavily on Micheal Jackson's 1993 half-time performance at Super Bowl 27. Both Beyonce and Bruno Mars' costumes featuring black and gold seemed to be little tributes to Micheal Jackson with Mars' costume in particular having a distinctly 1990's feel to it.
In the 1980's Micheal Jackson was one of the first solo black male performers to break through into the mainstream. As a result he continues to be idolised by many black Americans. However Micheal Jackson was also a drug addicted paedophile who was the product of an extremely violent childhood. As such I'm certain that Micheal Jackson is not a man I would want my kids to grow up to be like.
I think the montage also lingered on Whitney Houston's 1991 performance at Super Bowl 25. Again Whitney Houston is considered an iconic trail-blazer by many black Americas. However she also had a massive drug problem and was almost destroyed by a domestically violent relationship with Bobby Brown. The day before last year's Super Bowl their daughter Bobbi Christina Brown at the age of 21 amid the same rumours of drug abuse and domestic violence.
As such the half-time show posed questions about the type of role models black America chooses and whether it is that rather than racism that is holding them back.
To avoid sticking the knife in too far the show ended with literally everyone involved - apparently even Coldplay's taxi driver was included - all standing together holding hands and linking arms on stage. This was a show of and a plea for unity over division.
I have to say though that my main impression of the half-time show though was that it just wasn't as spectacular as previous years.
The reason for this is that the really spectacular shows rely heavily on lighting effects, pyrotechnics etc. For those to work you need darkness. With this year's Super Bowl being all the way out in San Francisco the half-time show actually took place in mid-late afternoon rather than early evening. This meant that the famous California sunshine was still in full effect.
California is famously the US state without an American Football team although I think this year there are plans to bring the Saint Louis Rams to Los Angeles. This somewhat flat half-time show rather poses of the question of whether California is just cut out for American Football?
Explaining my behaviour rather than the show itself I should point out that in the UK there is this nursery rhyme called "Nellie the Elephant."
Essentially this is just a silly song to amuse very young children. However it's about an Elephant who runs away from the circus and travels to Hindustan - an colonial era name for India - and Mandalay which technically is in Burma/Myanmar but is often used to refer to some mythical place in the Chinese far east.
Although I couldn't find it on Youtube in one version a Monkey tries riding on the Elephant's back but falls off, sliding down her trunk. This version ends with essentially the chant of; "What became of the Monkey, Monkey, Monkey, Monkey."
I've had that song stuck in my head ever since I've realised what the Super Bowl was trying to do in terms of using India to put pressure on China while they were celebrating the start of the Year of the Monkey.
At 15:45 on 8/2/16 (UK date) I'll be back to make a start on the commercials.
Edited at around 16:30 on 8/2/16 (UK date) to add;
The Commercials: With it being such a provocative year I wouldn't have been at all surprised if many advertisers chose to stay away. Their absence itself would make a statement about all the division being bad for business.
I have to say though that this year Budweiser absolutely nailed it.
Their main commercial featured British actress Helen Mirren in what was essentially a public service announcement urging people not to drink and drive.
One of BLM's big cause celeb of 2015 was Sandra Bland who committed suicide after being arrested for Driving Under the Influence (DUI) of alcohol/drugs. BLM argued that this offence wasn't serious enough to justify the arrest.
On December 20th 2015 (20/12/15) a woman crashed her car into a crowd outside a hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada killing one and injuring 36. This highlighted to BLM the very serious effects that DUI can have. Budweiser have obviously chosen to reinforce that message.
Helen Mirren played the Queen of England in the 2006 movie "The Queen." Therefore having her telling off Americans off for being so stupid is a reference to how throughout 2015 many nations - led by the UK - queued up to tell Obama to stop being so stupid and end the BLM campaign.
At the end Ms Mirren tells Americans to stop being a "pillock." This is a minor British swear word that Americans might not be familiar with. Literally translated it means "penis" however it's used in the same context you would use "dick." As in; "Stop being a dick."
While I'm on the topic of teaching Americans to swear more effectively I should point out that the word "Twat" is pronounced "Tw-At" not "Twot." There is neither an "O" nor a "H" in there. Except when I'm involved ; )
The commercial for Budweiser's "Bud-Light" brand featured comedians Seth Rogen and Amy Schumer as political candidates for the Bud-Light Party. Their message was that rather than focusing on the things that divide them Americans should concentrate of the things that unite them - such as Paul Rudd and Bud-Light.
Featuring bawdy jokes about things like checking out the size of some-ones 'Caucus' this was intended as an antidote to all the endless election campaigning. However with Bud-Light's branding sharing the blue of the Democrat Party it seemed to be having a specific dig at Obama and the Democrats.
What is also interesting is that Seth Rogan is actually Canadian. Part of the UK Commonwealth Realm Canada was among that long queue of nations lining up to tell Obama to stop being a pillock.
Back in October 2015 Amy Schumer teamed up with her cousin - Democrat Senator Chuck Schumer - to campaign for more gun control on Obama's behalf. This led to a rather unfortunate photograph doing the rounds after this year's Golden Globe awards which showed anti-gun campaigner Amy Schumer being guarded by lots of men with guns. She may have opted to do this commerical to apologise for the gun control campaign.
With it being such a provocative and controversial year many brands seem to have steered into the skid as it were and gone for shock-value.
Doritos: Their most talked about commercial this year features a heavily pregnant woman having an ultrasound. Because they're so delicious the woman's husband - they're both clearly wearing wedding rings - can't stop eating Doritos even during this medical procedure. As a joke he offers the unborn baby some Doritos.
They then notice on the ultrasound screen that the baby is actually reaching for the Doritos. So the father tries to see if he can get the baby to move about by sort of playing keep-away with the Doritos. The woman snatches it out his hands and throws the Dorito across the room.
At this point the baby chases the Dorito by escaping the woman's vagina at great speed. That made even me wince.
Although I can't be sure I think the pregnant woman is played by an actress called Christine Woods and if not she certainly resembles her.
Ms Woods is probably most famous for playing an FBI agent in the 2009/10 TV show "Flashforward" in which everyone keeps having blackouts - the loss of consciousness rather than the BLM campaign tactic. Despite being gay during her blackouts Ms Wood's character keeps having visions of herself pregnant and having an ultrasound scan.
I remain convinced that Christine Woods was cast in Flashforward because she resembles Robin Tunney who up until recently starred in "The Mentalist." When she's not in character Taryn Manning who plays Tiffany "Pennsatucky" Doggett in "Orange is the New Black" also resembles Robin Tunney. So much so that in the final season of The Mentalist they made a whole big joke out of it.
These are obviously the sort of in-jokes that I enjoy.
Mountain Dew: This starts with three young men sitting on the couch complaining they don't have the energy to go out partying. Then a trap door in the wall opens and the weirdest thing walks in carrying a bucket of Mountain Dew Kickstart which is essentially an energy drink.
Christened the "PuppyMonkeyBaby" this thing has the legs of a diaper wearing baby, the body of a monkey and the head of a Pug-like dog. It just repeats the words "Puppy, Monkey, Baby" over and over again in a hypnotic chant while shaking a maraca. At one point it licks one of the men on the face before leading all three men out of the apartment to what we assume is a party.
If you were sitting there watching that as either the parent of a new baby or the partner of woman who really wants a baby and perhaps has brought herself a little Pug-like dog to compensate I can imagine this commerical being extremely uncomfortable viewing.
The thing that really annoys me about the Super Bowl is that here in the UK we don't get any of the commercials. As it was broadcast on the BBC this year we didn't even get British commercials. This ends up meaning that I'm being forced to stay up until almost dawn and actually only getting to see about 40% of the spectacle.
I try and compensate by watching some of the commercials online when they get mentioned on Twitter. In reading up on the PuppyMonkeyBaby commerical I clicked on a dodgy link that downloaded a virus. This obviously spoilt the evening somewhat.
If this had happened on a PC or a device using the Android operating system I could have quite easily got into the code to identify this virus and the best way to remove it. However this happened on my Amazon tablet which uses a specially adapted version of Android which effectively prevents you from accessing the code.
This is a long-term irritation of mine because led by Apple as we move towards Smartphones and apps people don't really understand what they're doing and what their devices are doing anymore. My advice is to read the terms & conditions on apps very carefully before choosing to install them.
With the Super Bowl taking place close to Silicon Valley and Beyonce trying to use it as an opportunity to promote her "Tidal" app I suppose this could lead into a discussion about net neutrality and technology more generally.
However I'm pretty sure it was just me drunkenly pressing the wrong button and then throwing an absolutely massive tantrum.
Heinz: This features Dachshund puppies dressed in hot-dog costumes racing across a field towards humans wearing Heinz ketchup costumes.
The Super Bowl is accompanied by something called the "Puppy Bowl" where cute puppies try and play American Football. Also a lot of food gets eaten during the Super Bowl including America's favourite the hot-dog. Therefore this image of puppies dressed as hot-dogs is pretty common
However the scenery resembled that scene from the BBC show "War & Peace" that I mentioned yesterday which features a man's penis. The challenge for any US broadcaster showing that episode is to edit out the penis before the character starts talking. I suppose you could describe that as; "A Wiener Race."
The thing that's really annoyed me about Super Bowl this year is that it would actually be quite fun to spend a whole hungover day watching funny commercials on the Internet. It's also quite fun to spend a whole day writing about them.
However with the World being what it is at the moment I can't really justify doing that. If anything catches my eye I might be back to comment on it. I think though this abridged version is going to be it for this year.
18:10 on 8/2/15 (UK date).
Sunday, 7 February 2016
COP20: Heroes To Us All.
So Super Bowl 50 in summary;
A long time ago some muppet convinced a moron that this was a sport.
So tonight a bunch of twats have battled another bunch of twats and arbitrarily declared themselves winners.
Eschewing the Protestant Orange in favour of the more tolerable all white tonight's bunch of twats are the Denver Broncos. A such "The Sheriff" has finally won the Super Bowl.
I suppose we should all just be grateful the NFL didn't do a "Jay-Z" and try and use it as an opportunity to recruit a whole new bunch of niggers to this nonsense.
Anyway. When does the Stanley Cup start. Clearly I've got some issues to work through.
04:00 on 8/2/16 (UK date).
A long time ago some muppet convinced a moron that this was a sport.
So tonight a bunch of twats have battled another bunch of twats and arbitrarily declared themselves winners.
Eschewing the Protestant Orange in favour of the more tolerable all white tonight's bunch of twats are the Denver Broncos. A such "The Sheriff" has finally won the Super Bowl.
I suppose we should all just be grateful the NFL didn't do a "Jay-Z" and try and use it as an opportunity to recruit a whole new bunch of niggers to this nonsense.
Anyway. When does the Stanley Cup start. Clearly I've got some issues to work through.
04:00 on 8/2/16 (UK date).
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